The Spice Girls keep things ‘sisterly’ and not ‘lesbiany’

December 7th, 2007 // 65 Comments

The Spice Girls in defiance of all logic and reason have been on a comeback tour. They appeared at the 12th Victoria’s Secret Fashion show and had a concert in L.A. on Wednesday where they spoke to FOX News about their strictly “sisterly” love:

On being back together:
“All of us together again, it is like a marriage,” Geri “Ginger Spice” Halliwell told us. “You just learn to understand each other, celebrate the differences.”

On what goes down behind closed doors:
“We don’t fight and we don’t share clothes,” Melanie “Scary” Brown said. “And we don’t sleep together.”

On Scary Spice’s attempts to lesbi-fy things:
“She has tried it on us though,” Victoria “Posh Spice” Beckham told Pop Tarts while pointing at Scary with arms entwined around Emma “Baby Spice” Bunton. “I’ve had to say ‘no’ so many times.”

On Geri Halliwell and I’s mutual obsession:
“I mean, could you imagine waking up to this (points to Scary’s body) every day of your life?” Geri laughed. “I just can’t stop staring at your boobs…”

I dream about the Spice Girl’s having lesbian orgies all the time. I mean, who doesn’t? In my fantasy Baby Spice just pulled off Posh Spice’s plastic head which upsets Ginger Spice causing her sick man abs to glow fire red. Ginger decides to Tae Bo Baby in the face then they make up by massaging each other inside a tank filled with pudding. But don’t think I left out Scary and Sporty Spice. Those two are having a kinky pillow fight over who gets to vacuum my apartment. I never really got to find out who wins because some idiot wanted to use the copier room to actually make copies. Then he had the nerve to ask me where my pants were. It’s none of your beeswax, Mr. CEO of the company.

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Comments (65)

  1. Shit BitchCarl | December 7, 2007 at 3:04 pm

    Forrest

    Reply
  2. Sir Friday | December 7, 2007 at 3:04 pm

    Lookn good

    Reply
  3. veggi | December 7, 2007 at 3:12 pm

    It’s about Thyme. Get it! Thyme… *hides head in shame*..

    Reply
  4. Mr Semprini | December 7, 2007 at 3:18 pm

    Blehh, they’re all lesbians. I went backstage to invite them to my Vroom-Vroom-Room-a-Luvin and they turned me down. Flat. So they gotta be lesbians coz no one can resist the Semprini. Woka-chikka-bow-wow!

    Reply
  5. Nefarious Crotch Kicker | December 7, 2007 at 3:24 pm

    Why are they dressed like air mattress/space waitresses?

    Reply
  6. Jimbo | December 7, 2007 at 3:29 pm

    @5 They are dressed like that so you will be asking yourslef that question and not listening to them sing. I think I would rather go see Hanna Montana than these animated fembots.

    Reply
  7. everyoneisdumb | December 7, 2007 at 3:31 pm

    haha veggi – did you post that just so you can make that joke? by the way, meat is AWESOME!

    Reply
  8. Auntie Kryst | December 7, 2007 at 3:32 pm

    I thought Sporty Spice was the dyke because of her name. I figured she used to play volleyball and was on women’s basketball team. By the way, who is the asshole that asked for this reunion anyway?

    Reply
  9. D. Richards | December 7, 2007 at 3:33 pm

    I don’t understand the big deal. Were the Spice Girls ever really famous? Do people really care if the Spices tour again;or record music that a whole staff of song writers limp-dicked through?

    It’s fun to watch the Spice-cunts perform because they’re not very confident. They’re just up there lip-syncing. It would take a tremendous set of balls to perform as a Spice Girl. They know that nobody gives a shit about them. But they forge ahead. They’re pros. Victoria’s the best. She’s almost not even there. She’s just following her compadres around like a little sister or something.

    Reply
  10. raven | December 7, 2007 at 3:35 pm

    geez baby got fat

    Reply
  11. raven | December 7, 2007 at 3:35 pm

    geez baby got fat

    Reply
  12. raven | December 7, 2007 at 3:35 pm

    geez baby got fat

    Reply
  13. HollywoodMom's | December 7, 2007 at 3:44 pm

    They look like they are made out of plastic (Victoria Beckham) or like very rich mom’s off to the boarding school to see there kid perform in the school play. The magic is gone. All that’s left is the memories.

    Reply
  14. LL | December 7, 2007 at 3:45 pm

    I hate to say anything nice about them because their “music” is so heinous, but they’re all looking pretty good. Even Posh looks OK. Any one of them beats Britney now, looks-wise. Britney’s the one who should hang her head in shame.

    Reply
  15. FRIST!!! | December 7, 2007 at 3:46 pm

    It took me so long to get rid of them, and now they are “coming back”???

    Wasted efforts…I suppose next you’ll tell me Britney’s making a comeback!!!!!

    Reply
  16. veggi | December 7, 2007 at 3:49 pm

    FRIST!!! Brit only makes back come.

    gawd, that was fucking gross!..

    bloody mary time!!!!!!!!! see ya fuckers!..

    Reply
  17. D. Richards (Saint.) | December 7, 2007 at 3:57 pm

    How much would it cost to have all of them take turns doing me with a strap on? Cause I’m kinda gay like that.

    Reply
  18. john's girl | December 7, 2007 at 3:59 pm

    What’s going on with Posh’s shins?

    Reply
  19. ! | December 7, 2007 at 4:01 pm

    haha…

    Reply
  20. leeshka | December 7, 2007 at 4:03 pm

    Ok, so… is that Posh, or is it that McCartney fellow’s exwife? I’m seeing some prothesis going on. HOLY SHIT… that’s not Posh Spice. That’s freaking Pan! Amazing that a Satyr can lipsync that well.

    Reply
  21. #6 Hey watch it man | December 7, 2007 at 4:18 pm

    Don’t talk trash about Hanna Montana. She is easily the most talented entertainer alive.

    Reply
  22. D. Richards (Clone.) | December 7, 2007 at 4:20 pm

    #17? I think I may have a fan-boy. You a fan, Dick? I like the way you immitate me. You’re good, kid. Damn, good.

    Reply
  23. Jaan Kanellis | December 7, 2007 at 4:29 pm

    Posh is a human robot.

    Reply
  24. George Best | December 7, 2007 at 4:36 pm

    The Spice Girls are all hot. Posh is the best!!

    Reply
  25. brian t | December 7, 2007 at 5:37 pm

    Um… has everyone forgotten that “Scary” was doing Shrek’s Asinine friend a couple of years ago, and has the baby to prove it? Oh, wait, I get it… she didn’t jump, she was pushed?

    Reply
  26. R. Dickards (lunatic) | December 7, 2007 at 6:10 pm

    I really liked the Spice Girls tour. They are a fantastic vocal group with great dancing.

    Reply
  27. Ted from LA | December 7, 2007 at 6:20 pm

    I don’t know who any of these people are, but I like the Spice rack on a couple of them.

    Reply
  28. Niche interracial dating | December 7, 2007 at 7:01 pm

    They are sexy. They had hot videos with black guys. Someone saw their videos at interracialconnect.com which is a niche interracial dating site. someone thought it is naughty. but I don’t think so. I think they are hot. passionate love sen*e

    Reply
  29. endoftheshityear | December 7, 2007 at 7:03 pm

    the soccer one, is her fake name Ploosh or something,
    the one on the far-right in the pic,
    is starting to look like Nancy Reagan

    ….. the geriatric Nancy I mean, of course, so that’s not a compliment

    Reply
  30. Ript1&0 | December 7, 2007 at 7:03 pm

    God this is too much to take. Potential spankings, fish butter, and now D Richards has a troll, and I’m just not cool enough to be a fan. Not cool enough at all.. oh my god… I want to be. Say something nasty and mean, it’s hot as hell.

    I gotta go.

    Reply
  31. Dude | December 7, 2007 at 10:20 pm

    The performance was lame, and the song is terrible. Posh looked as talentless as ever, and twice as clunky. Im not really sure how these chicks made it to begin with, and I hope nothing but failure for the reunion. I hear they’re opening for Tool.

    Reply
  32. Dan | December 7, 2007 at 10:38 pm

    “I’s”?

    Reply
  33. Dan | December 7, 2007 at 10:42 pm

    Hold on, I’m still checking I’s dictionary…

    Reply
  34. gerard Vandenberg | December 7, 2007 at 11:17 pm

    Maybe paris wants to lick some kind of PUSSIE and make a sex-tape of it. She is used to make sex-tapes of everything that gives her person extra attention. I would not be surprised when someday a new sex-tape will be released called: ONE NIGHT IN PARI’S HORSE-STABLE!!
    Fucked by a gigantic HORSE!!

    Reply
  35. magpie | December 8, 2007 at 2:07 am

    I’d make a sex tape with em. harharhar

    Reply
  36. Blondamnation | December 8, 2007 at 3:19 am

    OK I’ll say it if no one else is going to. BABY GOT BACK.

    Her hips are wider than 3 ‘Posh’es all mashed together.

    God #34, do we have to listen to you again?? Go find that lonely guy porn site you’re addicted to, please, and leave this site alone. You make me want to vomit more than the spice girls..

    Reply
  37. Blondamnation | December 8, 2007 at 3:22 am

    @34 and what the fuck, by the way, are you reading? Some old Paris post? Wipe of your computer screen and take a look.
    And please leave that horse alone. If you’re that desperate I hear Tara Reid needs a date.

    Reply
  38. lisa630 | December 8, 2007 at 4:56 am

    Come on! Girls! What you are doing is alluring the guys to commit.
    Guys, the pubspa.com is a good place for you to make friend and get new information you want.

    Reply
  39. Grape Ape Pees Wine on You | December 8, 2007 at 10:20 am

    #38 — thanks for the extremely insightful post.

    Hmmm…I think each of these ladies looks pretty good. Just because Posh doesn’t smile much doesn’t make her a robot. She’s actually got a decent self-deprecating sense of humor.

    If you’re a woman, you’d kill to look like any of those ladies.

    Reply
  40. Grape Ape Pees Wine on You | December 8, 2007 at 10:21 am

    #38 — thanks for the extremely insightful post.

    Hmmm…I think each of these ladies looks pretty good. Just because Posh doesn’t smile much doesn’t make her a robot. She’s actually got a decent self-deprecating sense of humor.

    If you’re a woman, you’d kill to look like any of those ladies. If you’re a dude, you’d kill to have any of those ladies.

    Reply
  41. Grape Ape Pees Wine on You | December 8, 2007 at 10:21 am

    #38 — thanks for the extremely insightful post.

    Hmmm…I think each of these ladies looks pretty good. Just because Posh doesn’t smile much doesn’t make her a robot. She’s actually got a decent self-deprecating sense of humor.

    If you’re a woman, you’d kill to look like any of those ladies. If you’re a dude, you’d kill to have any of those ladies.

    Reply
  42. A | December 8, 2007 at 3:19 pm

    Better girls i see walking on the streets… They are medium, nothing special. Come to Ukraine and see how NATURAL beauty looks :D

    Reply
  43. D. Richards (Bastard.) | December 8, 2007 at 7:20 pm

    #30. Hello, Ript. You’re just a greasy little sponge; soaking up the grease that comes from my testicles after I fuck you with the hate that courses through my veins. Aren’t ‘cha? Aren’t ‘Cha?! Yes! You are. Yes!

    Was that filthy enough? I can be filthier. I promise. God, I don’t want you to see how fragile I really am. Oh, god..

    I like Ript1&0. Most of these people that post shit here at The Super are just so fucking “real”. You can’t say anything without their problems showing. Ript isn’t one of those people.

    Reply
  44. felix | December 8, 2007 at 10:34 pm

    they are great, the clothes, hat, and the hair. i signed in the site
    sugarmommymeet.com and some men were talking them and said they are
    attractive.

    Reply
  45. Ript1&0 | December 9, 2007 at 6:02 am

    YES!!! YES!!! I almost came on myself reading that. Fuck man.

    Filthy and fragile is a good combination. So is being real and having problems.

    But anyway back to the hate, please. Just keep being a dick and I’ll keep having to leave periodically to fuck myself.

    Reply
  46. casualpal.com | December 9, 2007 at 7:21 am

    hot girls, like the girls I’ve met on casualpal.com

    Reply
  47. Roses | December 9, 2007 at 12:12 pm

    Posh looks so much nicer with her hair like this. She is almost beautiful now and not her normal alien looking self.

    Reply
  48. Nando | December 9, 2007 at 8:55 pm

    They all look so hot!! Geri’s abs are SIIIIIIICCCKKK!!!! Mel B’s body is a perfect hour glass shape.

    Reply
  49. tc | December 9, 2007 at 9:40 pm

    In order of preference :

    Scary (missionary, then arse)
    Ginger (bj, then missionary)
    Baby (missionary only)
    Sporty (arse only)
    Posh / a blow up doll (bj, missionary, arse).

    Reply
  50. fhf | December 10, 2007 at 12:18 am

    hot

    Reply

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