The Most Important People Ever. (Until about noon-ish.)

February 23rd, 2009 // 56 Comments

Here are the most important actors of the moment despite the fact not one of them has been a guest star on Lost. Try and figure that one out. Anyway, the winners of the 81st Annual Academy Awards:

Best Actress: Kate Winslet, The Reader
Best Supporting Actress: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Best Actor: Sean Penn, Milk
Best Supporting Actor: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight

I feel kind of bad that I’ve only seen one of the four movies listed above, and it wasn’t even the one where Penelope Cruz makes out with Scarlett Johansson. That’s like sleeping through Christmas. Twice.

NOTE: For the whole 2009 Oscars enchilada scope out I Watch Stuff.com’s liveblog coverage. Because I’m lazy.

Photos: Getty
superficial

  1. wettster

    aw yeah.

  2. wettster

    aw yeah.

  3. You’re up early.

    I watched “The Reader” last night!

    There’s like an hour of fucking, and then there’s some other stuff.

  4. I'm Barack Obama and I approve...

    So…it turns out there is a formula to winning an Oscar.

    Make a movie about fags, for fags, and walk away with a prize.

    That’s why Hollywood is so friggin’ pathetic. Can anyone honestly say that Sean Penn deserved that Oscar over Mickey Rourke or Frank Langella??

    Insane.

    I’m off to write my fag movie.

  5. #3 just made me decide to cave in and see The Reader.

    And can anyone tell me what Heath Ledger wore last night, I didn’t see it on Joan Rivers report!

  6. SB

    i didnt get a chance to watch. does anyone know if Ledger was there to accept his award…..? hahha zinnnger!!

  7. So nothing for Nailin’ Palin? What a disgrace…

  8. John Fisher

    Thank god the Oscars are over so the cast of Slumdog can get back to their tech support jobs.

  9. cady

    Ladies all like to join _____Millionaire Romances com_____. I really do not know why? Just cuz many wealthy men and celebrities there? or the men there are all handsome?

  10. johnnybravo

    To # 8
    Dont hate the players, Hate the Game ! Just because they make more money than it doesnt give you the right to whine about it in public. You can whine about it when you go home to your miserable and pathetic life as well as your $ 200 a week job !

  11. johnnybravo

    To # 8
    Dont hate the players, Hate the Game ! Just because they make more money than you doesnt give you the right to whine about it in public. You can whine about it when you go home to your miserable and pathetic life as well as your $ 200 a week job !

  12. @4 Maybe they’ll make some “Milk” action figures like the “Philadelphia” ones on SNL. Langella needs an Oscar for “Masters of the Universe”.

    @5 Winslet did no full frontal worth mentioning. Just so everyone knows that going in. Poignant movie, though. “Underworld 10: Attack of the Hissy Fits” had already played and I’d already seen “The Wrestler”.

  13. Barry O

    Guess the gays had to get at least one consolation prize w/ Sean Penn in (Ass)Milk. Betw Prop 8 & the latest gonorrhea outbreak, it’s been a rough year to be brokeback.

  14. Bickus Dickus

    Nice to see Hollywood hasn’t changed from the bunch of queer-ass homo cocksmoking pillowbiters that they are. I’m suprized they didn’t do a tribute to Pedro Zamora to cap off the whole anally lubed event.

  15. Frickin' Beaners

    Also, congrats to Penelope Cruz, for winning the “Mexican celebrity who never bothered to learn to speak English but still gets cast in tons of American movies Award”.

  16. Candy0

    I’m the real CandyO
    As sure as the stink within my hole
    Rank and sweaty like a dirty sock
    Filled with cheese from daddy’s cock
    On my knees at the circle-k
    Making rent from day to day
    The n|ggers pass me round and round
    But I don’t let it get me down
    I crawl back home full of jizz and poo
    And go to my room to sniff some glue
    My nasty habits take their toll
    I’m a white trash whore named CandyO

  17. TJ

    The Oscars are garbage. The products are usually immoral, the hosts America-hating jerks, and the winners are either Affirmative Action or political picks. Ergo Penn over Rourke so he could bash the majority of California voters.

  18. Richard McBeef

    ledger is looking pretty good in pics 7 & 8. I wonder what he’ll do about that receding hairline?

  19. alish

    Kate is awesome!! hard work finally pays off!!!!!!!!!!
    she’s still attractive to many people! you don’t know how hot cougars and sexy old folks on ” ___Agelessmate.com___ ” go crazy about her act!! she’s like kinda role model to many people there!!

  20. I’m never watching again – I got all I need to know from last night in these two paragraphs and three minutes of Stiller:

    http://tinyurl.com/dkrjnm

  21. Shannon

    Kate FINALLY won! About friggin’ time.

  22. carol

    Kate looked great!!!!!. I love her.

  23. carol

    Kate looked great!!!!!. I love her.

  24. Apes in the White House

    You could see the sperm spilling out of the side of Sean Penn’s mouth last night. What a tool. Figures the “Academy” would give an Award to an America Hating cocksmoker like Penn, who hasn’t made a decent movie since Bad Boys in 1982. Spicoli was his crowning achievment and all his movies since then have sucked almost as much cock as he does.

  25. Harry Balsac

    Heath Ledger was there?

    weird.

  26. who knew?

    well, heath looks dead in those pictures.

  27. who knew?

    well, heath looks dead in those pictures.

  28. Jrz

    What a mercy fuck to give Heath Ledger the Oscar. BOO!!
    Robert Downey, Jr. deserved it…primarily because he did drugs right, unlike Heath Ledger….fuckin novice.

  29. Bigo

    Penelope Cruz won the Oscar for playing a lesbian? and Penn for playing a homo?

    Next year, all the Oscars will go to gays.

  30. Racer X

    Kate Winslet > all

  31. rub a map

    hey 15 even if I think Penelope is a mediocre actress and should not have won the oscar, she is not mexican,she is from Spain,you know that european country that discovered America.

  32. CandyO

    I liked it better when acting like a retard was the golden ticket to the Oscar. I’ve been perfecting my Oscar winning performance for years!

  33. truk

    @10,11 ..don’t hate the game, players or anything like that, We all just hate the idiots like you who keep spitting out the same stupid sayings.

  34. Fucking Brits are reinvading… Grammy and Emmy Awards, Oscars, fuck, even that show Brink on the Science Channel. Blood sausage eatin’ warm beer drinkin’ beeotches…

  35. CandyO

    Hahah #10 you are a tremendous faggot. way to defend a bunch of strangers on the internet from the vicious slings and arrows of superficial commentors

  36. Apes in the White House

    @29, these are the rules that the “Academy” voters must follow:

    1) If you’re a black nominee, they have to vote for you, because if they don’t, they’d be racist.

    2) If you or your character is in any special interest group, i.e. Faggot, Dyke, Lesbo, Athiest, Pedophile, etc… they have to vote for you, because every “Academy” voter falls into one of those categories themselves.

    3) If you’re a foreigner, and the first two categories didn’t take dibs over your situation, then the Academy votes for you, whether you can speak English or not…(i.e. Penelope Cruz)

    4) If the movie you’re in has a left-wing communist/radical adjenda and portrays the US as evil, then you garner the vote.

    5) If none of the above applies, then the “Academy” examines previous movies the actor was in, and if any of the above applies, then you will get the vote.

    6) You are Brittish and were in a shitty, unwatchable piece of shit movie.

    7) If you’re a plain old white guy and none of the above apply, then it’s possible you may garner consideration.

  37. #4 – “I’m off to write my fag movie”

    I think you meant to say “autobiography”.

  38. RichPort's Vaginal Odor

    #4, I’m sorry, I meant, could you write my biography, it would make a great fag movie. Because no one is a bigger fag than me. My fagginess is the faggiest of the faggoty-fag fags.

  39. sin

    STUPID. These awards are given by fags to fags and the only critics they listen to and print reviews from are fags. Hollywood is an AIDS infested blight on the Nation and should be forcefully removed.

  40. grobpilot

    It’s amazing how Sean Penn can be controversial and so fucking insignificant as the same time. Like 99.9% of Hollywood, if he suddenly, mysteriously disappeared today, within two weeks he would fade from thought. THAT’S how much of an impact this fucking communist has had on the world.

  41. grobpilot

    It’s amazing how Sean Penn can be controversial and so fucking insignificant as the same time. Like 99.9% of Hollywood, if he suddenly, mysteriously disappeared today, within two weeks he would fade from thought. THAT’S how much of an impact this fucking communist has had on the world.

  42. Jennyjenjen

    @31 How does one “discover” a country already inhabited?

  43. therush

    Jennyjenjen, you try to kill all the heathens and have the pope declare you the “discoverer”.

  44. kate

    Kate is sooooooooooooooooooooo awesome!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Wanna join hot cougars and milfs’ dating party???
    It’s going hot right now at ___ AgelessMate Com ____ sexy oddies there simply rock N rule!!

  45. Chad

    I find it funny how the bashers on here whine about how insignificant Hollywood is yet ummm….they all seem to be on a ……what kind of website is this again…..ummm….oh ya….. a celebrity gossip site. Give me a break. You all worship Hollywood as much as Hollywood (given the results of last nights show) worships the cock.

  46. Katherine

    @15…First of all she’s not even Mexican…indeed, she is from Spain. You know, Spain being that country south of France that at one point controlled more than half of the known world.

    And just because she has a thick Spanish accent doesn’t mean she doesn’t know English, and I’d rather be Penelope with her looks and millions than your white trash self. And don’t act like your broke ass isn’t at Taco Bell stuffing your face with $0.89 bean burritos… please, eighty percent of Americans would be beaners if that were considered.

  47. Jennyjenjen

    @43 ahh yes.. the Pope..

  48. AirMail

    Someone should tell Penn to stay away from his Thug friend in Venezuela. In Latin America, the distinction between a guy that is gay, and a guy only playing it in a movie will not be understood. If he tries to turn down some guys advances, he will be thought of as playing ‘hard to get.’ In which case he will wake up with a knot on his head and a butt hole the size of eggplant.

  49. Mike Oxbhig

    Heath Ledger?…for a total of about 40 words and 3 minutes total screen time? Are you kidding? His role was nothing short of…mediocre. What a waste, just like these awards.

    Where is a suicide bombing al queada fucknut when you need him? He could have gotten those terrorist shitstains back on the good side of America by show…er…blowing up there.

  50. Anita Hanchob

    @49

    HAHAHA…so true. You Rule Dude!…I havent seen you on in a while. I remember when you used to hand elliot_spitz_on_her , jonesy, the irish drunk mick guy and a few others on here their asses on a daily basis. Need I say again. YOU RULE!! WELCOME BACK!

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