The 2009 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show

If you don’t like looking at insanely hot women in lingerie, now would be a good time to go see New Moon and/or become a People subscriber. These are shots from last night’s 2009 Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show, and I started things off with Alessandra Ambrosio and Marisa Miller who seem to be engaged in some sort of epic ab battle where the only real loser is all of us who will never get to touch them. — Wow, I honestly didn’t set out to drive people to suicide, yet here we are. My bad.

- Added Miranda Kerr whose ass should’ve been the top pic. I’ve failed you.

- Added Selita Ebanks because I hope Nick Cannon is reading and sobbing in his butler outfit. This isn’t how you make Mariah’s sandwich.

- Added Doutzen Kroes. Do I really have to explain why?

Photos: Getty