The Superficial’s Top 25 Moments of 2011

December 30th, 2011 // 235 Comments
Best of 2011
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“Suck it, tall people.”

The Best of 2011 posts are great and everything, but let’s be honest, they’re purely dominated by tits, ass and somehow Lindsay Lohan because you people make me sick. Anyway, what falls through the cracks are the tender moments that truly reflect the human condition, but mostly involve Derek Jeter banging chicks and thanking them with sports memorabilia. So here are our favorite moments of 2011 that readers didn’t repeatedly click on because you’re too homophobic to appreciate the rich, sexual thunder of Alexander Skarsgard that thrusts its way into you and awakens a lust you yourself never knew existed.. is how Photo Boy described it. I’ve never seen those words before in my life. My diary’s a liar!

Back on Tuesday,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Flynet, GSI Media, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Anthony Weiner
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He got one of those emails about ‘guaranteed 3″ growth in a month with our secret formula’ so he sent a pic back saying ‘Can you help me with this?’

  2. bob

    holy shit, how many fucking more times am i gonna click on this site to see this guys mug. who the fuck is he anyways, dont answer i dont actually care

    • If you don’t know who he is, and can’t (or won’t) figure it out, that would indicate something lacking in your constitution. That narrows down to either laziness or stupidity. Your choice. If clicking here annoys you, there is one very simple solution…

  3. Pippa Middleton Butt
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Kate’s ass is much better.

  4. Weston Cage Karate Kick
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Imagine the kick in the balls you could give him when he does that. Better still, imagine the satisfaction of doing it.

  5. Scarlett Johansson Pregnant
    Snack pack
    Commented on this photo:

    Of all the pics I saw on this site, this is the one that haunts me. How is it possible for her to look like this, then a month or so later be walking the red carpet with her usual hourglass figure and sizeable chest? Do these starlets wear fat-suits to get attention so that everyone will pay attention when they attend something? I just now realized that in 2012, I resolve to get more life than I have now so I don’t fret over these things. Ugh.

  6. Amanda Seyfried Stuffed Dead Baby Horse
    Snack pack
    Commented on this photo:

    WHACK – A – DOODLE – DOO!

  7. Billy Ray Cyrus
    Snack pack
    Commented on this photo:

    Is there a hole in the Sugar Pops box for easy (and private) access like a popcorn tub in the movie theater?

  8. Michelle Duggar Jim Bob Duggar
    Snack pack
    Commented on this photo:

    I know, I know, I know. But almost no one creeps me out more than these two.

  9. herbiefrog

    so…

    happy 2012 to lindsay : )))

    we’re sure we will all have a pretty good year… : )

    nite nite [you illiterate b*stards]

  10. Anthony Weiner
    Weiner-Hater
    Commented on this photo:

    This useless SOB got everything coming to him, I’m so glad he’s a has-been so I don’t have too hear his stupid-ass on radio or TV again, he is such a “Prick”. LOL!!

  11. Samantha Slopes Cleavage Slash
    Ravi Sethna Ramalamadingdong
    Commented on this photo:

    Was Slash’s wife ever seen again or has she totally disappeared into that mound of blubber? She should have one of those tracking devices that they recommend for avalanche prone areas.

  12. Alexander Skarsgard
    Commented on this photo:

    I still check for Askars return to the Superficial every day. It was a good work day when his pic popped up on my phone….

  13. Michelle Duggar Jim Bob Duggar
    Debutante
    Commented on this photo:

    What a bunch of Weirdo As**Hol(# !!!

  14. Kelsey Grammer Kayte Walsh Make Out
    Commented on this photo:

    In my experience it’s never a great sign when they won’t uncross their arms.

  15. Chris Evans Captain America The Avengers
    GuyLeDouche
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m going to go with he has just emerged from his secret hideout in San Francisco.

  16. Peter Dinklage
    squishy
    Commented on this photo:

    Absolutely love Peter Dinklage and he is going to rock Season 2!!

  17. Frank Sorrentino
    Commented on this photo:

    What? No pinkie ring?

  18. Alexander Skarsgard
    Weaselmouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Skarsgaard and Fish’s concocted soundtrack tribute to him have been my favorite things this year. I came back to this page a few times today just to click the ‘play’ button and stare at that vampie hotness.

  19. Weston Cage Karate Kick
    Commented on this photo:

    If he’s trying to look like Benjamin Millepied, he needs to improve his point.

  20. Ryan Seacrest Fondles Julianne Hough Breast
    Commented on this photo:

    Put down your fucking phone and go at it two-handed like a man!

  21. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Too bad he can’t run for president. He looks like a young Ronald Reagan (i.e. 70-ish).

  22. Weston Cage Karate Kick
    Commented on this photo:

    What happened to Dreg, anyway? Rehab?

  23. Amanda Seyfried Stuffed Dead Baby Horse
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    No, no… she’s desperate for a blockbuster so she’s practicing her Spielberg Face.

  24. January Jones Cleavage
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    I just can’t imagine the cost and time involved in producing a ladder made of Raggedy Ann hair and turning it into a dress. Either that or her designer REALLY hates gingers…

  25. Benjamin Millepied Ballet Dancing
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    The sad thing is that this pic was taken in the Bronx just minutes before he was set upon by a roaming gang of foaming homophobes who beat him silly while he screamed: “I knocked up a girl! Weely!! Oh, stop!”

  26. Tom Brady Disneyland Waterslide
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Bet he giggles like Anderson Cooper.

  27. Frank Sorrentino
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    “Maybe one day, you can do ME a favor — by whacking my son.”

  28. Anthony Weiner
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought at first it was a young Bela Lugosi…

  29. Michelle Duggar Jim Bob Duggar
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    What weirds me out is the way she’s looking at beady-eye squash-nose in this photo — like a dog hoping for a pat. Puts women’s lib back at least 60 years…

    • Amy

      Lol. This comment made me laugh. Makes me think of that small dog from Loony Tunes that hopped around and tried to please the big dog, Butch. “I dun good din’t I boss?” SMACK! “Shaddup.”

  30. Weston Cage Karate Kick
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s got a surprisingly strong build and Nick is such a stringbean. Maybe Weston’s mama was burly.

  31. Ryan Seacrest Fondles Julianne Hough Breast
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy shit, I still think it looks like he’s groping a little kid!

  32. Hugh Hefner Planking
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    The maid really needs to clean off that table.

  33. Chris Evans Captain America The Avengers
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Actually, it’s hard to beat the “official” caption on this one.

  34. Ryan Dunn Drunk
    Bobby Light
    Commented on this photo:

    At least he died the way he lived, with a car up his ass.

  35. Shia LaBeouf
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Thanks to his last name, the guy in Vancouver probably just thought he was French Canadian.

  36. January Jones Cleavage
    butt juice
    Commented on this photo:

    Her eyebrow situation is just too much for me to handle right now.

  37. Alexander Skarsgard
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    BTW, Fish, remember the girl from Austin who was the SF avatar for a while? Can you get her back for a second round? I will stoop to begging.

  38. Benjamin Millepied Ballet Dancing
    Amy
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah well he is hot and was around. I mean, how does someone like Natalie Portman meet someone new? Most likely work where everyone is an actor/ess, dancer, producer, etc.

  39. Billy Ray Cyrus
    Bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    This photo shopped moment was brought to you by Walt Disney

  40. Samantha Slopes Cleavage Slash
    Linds
    Commented on this photo:

    wtf is an online relationship

    no such thing, that’s like saying you have an invisible friend.

  41. Shia LaBeouf
    Bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    Shia LaBeouf gives the world his freshly gerbiled look

  42. Samantha Slopes Cleavage Slash
    Jon Hex
    Commented on this photo:

    The story makes more sense when you realize Slash is half black and have seen any midday talk show.

  43. Weston Cage Karate Kick
    Bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    Weston Cage starts his own gang. The Gay Weirdo Posse, current membership one.

  44. Ryan Seacrest Fondles Julianne Hough Breast
    Bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    Close your eyes and think of me baby, there are cameras!

  45. forrest gump

    hollywood even thinks of awards for the biggest losers in the industry?

  46. Pippa Middleton Butt
    Not here
    Commented on this photo:

    It was used to deter attention from the royal couple to give media something else to focus on

  47. Quentin Tarantino
    Not here
    Commented on this photo:

    Big deal so what.

  48. Peter Dinklage
    Cartman
    Commented on this photo:

    Midgets are always hilarious.

  49. Samantha Slopes Cleavage Slash
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet twenty bucks that her online profile lists her body type as “curvy”, any takers?

  50. Peter Dinklage
    LadyMoustache
    Commented on this photo:

    Wowza.. he’s the James Bond of Little People. Sexy!

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