Sorry to hit you guys with two Jersey Shore posts in one day, but watching massive egos being handed a soapbox is my crack. This time around, ABC Nightline sat down with The Situation who proceeded to go on a tangent about how his natural talents are far greater than that of mortal men – not counting the cucumber stuffed in his pants. They’re rich in Vitamin A, you guys:
On being more than just the abs:
“I work very hard on my body, and I’m not just known for my six-pack or my body. I also believe that I have pretty good camera presence. … Those one-liners, those are not practiced. They just come out naturally.”
On playing a character:
“It is a part of my personality, but not the full circle. That character that you see is ‘The Situation.’ It’s not Michael Sorrentino. You’re seeing ‘The Situation,’ almost like Clark Kent and Superman.”
On his future with Jersey Shore:
“I was very upset and, and contemplated — not necessarily retiring from reality TV, but possibly retiring from ‘Jersey Shore,’. I give ‘Jersey Shore’ exactly what it needs, okay?”
Yes, please, let this guy quit Jersey Shore to finally become the superstar years preening in front of the mirror has told him he is. Because there’s no way MTV could find five random nobodies, shove them in a beach house and suddenly have a hit show on their hands. Just the mere thought of it is dumb on its face. They might as well cancel the whole network.
Photos: Splash News
Oh my cock!
His abs aren’t even that good.
And his arms look like midget arms. He’s the farthest thing from a gentleman there is. I wish somebody would kill him.
i like his cock!
I think you mean sock.
ha,..
Look at pic 3 – he looks like such a flamer… I’ll bet that sock is laden with all kinds of smegma, ass hair, and poo from his last twink-out…yummy!!!
first
missed it by three posts.
and u will hereby live with the shame..
He’ll be working at a carwash within 3 years.
I wish he would drown in a vat of boiling vomit!
Tasty!
He could stand to do some incline presses.
Nice tits homo. Seriously any guy whos into the male form so much to do that to himself.. is probly gona wake up one day in hospital like rod stewart, getting cum pumped out his stomach
“he’s gay, he’s gay”. Yeah, good one. Why do people jump to the obvious pathetic insult of calling somebody gay???
B/c just like women start hating on whatever incredibly hot piece of ass the SW posts, so do men start hating on dudes with incredibly ripped bodies. It works both ways, you see. Chicks call other chicks that are way hotter than them “slut”, “bitch”, etc while dudes rail at other extremely fit dudes with “homo”, “fag” and “cum guzzler”. See? Men and women aren’t so different after all, lol.
LOL.
Sassyfrass wins the internet!
girl-hands
Totally…hahaha!!!
Good call. And in that last pic his legs look girly in those pants.
dude is tiny, if he’s 5’5″ id be surprised.
little boy big mouth
i bet the dude is depressed in fat within the next 5 years. he’ll be on some where are they now show talking about how good he had it but it was gone in a flash.
His hands look like a womens.
Totally… They look like they should be playing a piano… Or a skin flute… I bet he is secretly gay…
Walking around with a sock stuffed in his tights?? Not sure if it’s such a secret.
“The Situation” refers to the situation he looks forward to after his grueling glamour-muscle workout: chocolate choo-choo train in the locker room!!
Actaully, I think it’s sewn into the underwear. You can buy them online, not that I would ever own one, or even know of them except I was surfing the net one time and came upon the page by accident. Yeah, that’s it.
With tight pants like those, even the chick looks “well gifted”
Nigel Tufnel: We’ve got Armadillos in our trousers. It’s really quite frightening
Master of the skin flute.
You will cream in your jeans when you see….”Bronx High School Dropouts in Trouble”
Hahaha was that from kf movie?? Had a sudden flashback of boobs smashing into the shower door.. Unless thats some old acid creepin up on me
Sam& Dude, you are both comedy scholars. The popcorn you’re eating has been pissed in, film at 11.
What is the Situation?
“The Situation is… long term chances of Valtrex overdose = HIGH.
I would suck his dick any day.
I love this guy. Super entertaining. Best “reality star” pretty much ever.
How so, exactly? I’ve suffered through that show a few times now, and can’t remember a single thing he’s said.
I can’t wait till this fucking tool is back swirling pizza dough.
If that is a euphemism for fudge-packing, not sure he was ever on hiatus…
Only if the pizza dough is chocolate…
Seeing him in the stretchy pants like that reminds me of the “Keep It Gay” scene in “The Producers”… You know that ‘package’ he’s packing nothing more than a sock or a bean bag… GROSS!!
He might dethrone Spencer Pratt for Duesch of the Year.
There is nothing in his pants that even remotely resembles a penis or ball sack. Nice stuff job there homo!
In pic #4 I swear he looks like Fisher Stevens’ ‘roided-up younger brother. Hopefully it runs in the family, since that one also had about 10 minutes of fame before he cheated on Michelle Pfeiffer because he thought he could do better.
I don’t know what’s more ridiculous: the carefully posed girlie hands, the delusion of “camera presence” or that stuffing that’s worthy of Mrs. Cubbison’s.
Lot of jealous dudes here, lol. Me and my bff hooked up with Mike one night and he did us both at the same time. His dick went into my vajay, out my butt, and into my bff. That’s no sock, that’s real italian sausage.
I think the nurse is calling. Hurry up and log off, it’s time for your meds!
I’m off the meds I took after surgery for my rectovaginal fistula, and I no longer need a nurse, thank you.
Wow, CherylX…never heard of a rectovaginal fistula, but please don’t leave us in the dark. Or, maybe you should!
Lol
I wonder if he feels like glenda when he wears his glittery outfits.
OMG , this is what my girlfriend wheres to the gym, minus the cod piece and hat to cover up the bad hairplugs.
Dude I love ya but don’t hate– I think he’s just hung. (He IS Italian) That ain’t no cucumber.
Take a closer look– looks like a real cock to me. He IS italian after all
Stupid wop has no symetry, no lats, skinny legs, arms don’t look right, skinny neck, no calves whatsoever…
Sam & dude: You are both gentlemen and scholars.
Wait, he has one-liners? and he comes up with them all by his lonesome? Man, I must be missing something. Of the few episodes I have seen all I have witnessed is a series of grunts, lame cheesy hand gestures meant I believe to look cool & looking at himself in the mirror. I half way expect his to say “who is the fairest in all the land?”. Or in my wildest fantasy he just falls in a lake looking at himself and drowns like Narcissus did. Mean, I know but tere are already too many stupid people out there leading the even dumber. We dont need a new king.
Okay… full disclosure… not only have I seen the show, but I think Pauly D is kind of funny and cute. The Situation is about 3% as attractive as he thinks he is, though.
Not trying to be funny here. I’m seriously asking.-
Are those GIRL TIGHT PANTS? (you know the kind, like the ones Kim Kardashian *loves* to wear)
To me he looks like Johnnie from the cartoon Ed, Edd, and Eddy. Google it and tell me he doesnt look like a live action Johnnie. All he needs is sum sandles and Plank the piece of wood (haha) Johnnie carried with him everywhere. I’m sure the s(h)ituation knows alot bout hardwood =)
accuse him for the bankruptcy of america!!
What BS. Sitch. PLEASE use a little less “stuffing” next time.
I’m embarrassed for ya.
My DH is – ahem – shall we say, large. (Lucky me!)
They DON’T stick out like that when you are just walking around in shorts.
It looks like he got kicked hard in the cojones and they swelled up.
Please try again lil’ Mike. Maybe back to the sock?
It’s because he gives so many guys hand jobs
LOL – he’s got a sock stuffed in down there…
It’s so obvious this dude has had botox (along with sticking a roid needle in his ass daily) and maybe some fillers too. I mean, look at the difference in his face between Season 1 and Season 2, it’s ridiculous. He needed it though, he does look better now, but that’s like saying a corpse looks better once it has some make-up on in the casket.
Just compare these pics to the ones above…
Example A: Season 1: http://jerseyshorestreaming.com/wp-content/gallery/michael-sorrentino/Mike-jersey-shore-episode1-005.jpg
Example: B: http://jerseyshorestreaming.com/wp-content/gallery/michael-sorrentino/Mike-jersey-shore-episode1-012.jpg
Of course, the guy is still beat no matter what.
He looks like a muscular old Jewish man. Check the nose and forehead!!! Not only that, his legs are like 50% too short for his torso. Yikes. Glad he’s not too bright for his own sake, he can still convince himself he’s “got it”.
He’s on the fast track for a future “Celebrity Rehab” season. I rarely use the word hate, but I hate this tool!
And he’s got girly hands. Ick.
I was going to make a snarky comment about how he looks like he’d smell like ass. But, after reading all the other comments I am shocked at all the dude haters. Jealous much?
Jealous of what? A loud-mouthed “grenade” banging semi-meathead with girl hands, stuffed undies, a pea brain, and no style who fell back-asswards into tens of thousands of dollars who is laughed at by millions? Yep, you got us there…
Clark Kent? Superman? More like Karl Malden with that schnozz!! (BTW: Nice sock stuff, Schnozz)
Trolololo! Lololooo-loo-lolooo
..I am sure he stuffed his pants..