The Search for Banner Girl: Day 1

June 29th, 2010 // 74 Comments

We’re only six hours into The Superficial Banner Girl Contest and already I’ve seen a ton of lovely ladies, a few not-so-lovely ones, a dude, one of my friends in her underwear, a porn star (No joke.) and most importantly, a chick with a giant black dildo in her mouth i.e. THE WINNER.

I’ve posted a few on Facebook, so feel free to hop over and scope out a few of the hot suckers who I can’t believe fell for this contestants:

Facebook: The Superficial Banner Girl Contest

In the meantime, there’s still time to enter, so don’t be shy. It’s not like I’m going to post your picture all over the Internet or something. — Oh, right.

Official Entry Page

superficial

  1. Debbie Downer

    Ahhahahahah to the chick with the dildo! WE HAVE A WINNER!

  2. Why does that dildo have an electric cord plugged into it?

    I’m no vagina electrician, but that seems like a serious electrical hazard if you ask me.

  3. Adoration
    Commented on this photo:

    From a weird angle I thought this was Amy Winehouse O.o

  4. Rough&Roses

    Black dildo, Jewish boyfriend I presume.

  5. Dave

    From now on all girls must have sex toys

  6. Rob

    lets see your friend in her underwear

  7. Piglet
    Commented on this photo:

    Dildo girl all the way!

  8. Louie
    Commented on this photo:

    If you look closely…it looks more like a stereo jack which could mean it’s an ohmybod vibrator…made to plug into your ipod and vibrate to the beat.

  9. Rough&Roses

    Miss Keys waiting for Bob hope estate to approve before she display a crack spread?

  10. Taz

    Why does Facebook get better pics than the site that gives you the Facebook friends?

  11. viggaz
    Commented on this photo:

    ugggh, it’s like she’s giving head to an Oh Henry bar.

  12. memem

    Post the entries somewhere other than Facebook, so the grown-ups can see them too!

    • Grown-ups? C’mon, my grandma is on Facebook (well her account got suspended for posting nudes, but that’s besides the point).

      Stop fighting technology – embrace it… like it was your electric dildo.

    • Deacon Jones

      I concur!!

      A lot of us have Facebook blocked on our work computers FISH! And I’m not motivated enough to log on from home (I’m jerking off to porn)

  13. tonybaloney
    Commented on this photo:

    When the nose is bigger than the dildo it ruins the effect.

  14. Richie Rich
    Commented on this photo:

    what an ugly bitch.. that does not look like a kitchen

  15. BC

    “Take a side-profile shot of yourself in the style of our seductress up top”
    Why has only one person managed to follow the first criteria of this?

    Also, which one is the ‘star?

    And just out of curiosity – why does everyone call the Superficial writer ‘Fish’? Where did this come from?

    • Montreal

      I think because none takes this seriously, duh. Plus if they did, they wouldn’t send pics of chicks with sextoys in their mouths and that would make baby Jesus cry. Second I think they call him fish because he is the super fi cial, super fic ial, super fish ial, then just fish.
      Can Randall tell me if this is right?

    • exactly what Montreal said

  16. Carolyn
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she’s sucking on a turd.

  17. Some Girl

    Girl that looks like Angelina Jolie with the heavy eyes on FB is hot but maybe the blond should win for effort.

    I should do this, hmms.

  18. Dr. Doogie McStickit
    Commented on this photo:

    Use my Ball-sack for your banner. I insist.

  19. Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    What a cry for attention.
    Let’s give it to her.

    I feel pity. She is so trashed.

    Are you sure it wasn’t her evil stepdad sending you a happy snap from last night’s torture session?

  20. crackatowa
    Commented on this photo:

    SRY

  21. melysa martinez
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope she was drunk or high when she submitted that, because it’s 100 percent the opposite of hot.

  22. JM
    Commented on this photo:

    What a fucking loser!

    So much of loser she should in fact be the winner so she has to live through the shame of being the ugly slut who’s whorish face is used as superficials banner so when her bastard child is old enough to use the web they can be proud to know that’s who they call mommy every single fucking day.

    (I’m going out on a limb here saying that she’s already got one bastard child because well, she probably has 2)

  23. JM23
    Commented on this photo:

    What a fucking loser!

    So much of loser she should in fact be the winner so she has to live through the shame of being the ugly slut who’s whorish face is used as superficials banner so when her bastard child is old enough to use the web they can be proud to know that’s who they call mommy every single fucking day.

    (I’m going out on a limb here saying that she’s already got one bastard child because well, she probably has 2)

  24. friendlyfires

    I simply cannot understand why Amy Winehouse has not entered. Her pterodactyl skull should be a shoo in.

  25. wtf
    Commented on this photo:

    What a fucking loser!

    So much of loser she should in fact be the winner so she has to live through the shame of being the ugly slut who’s whorish face is used as superficials banner so when her bastard child is old enough to use the web they can be proud to know that’s who they call mommy every single fucking day.

    (I’m going out on a limb here saying that she’s already got one bastard child because well, she probably has 2)

  26. wtf

    What a fucking loser!

    So much of loser she should in fact be the winner so she has to live through the shame of being the ugly slut who’s whorish face is used as superficials banner so when her bastard child is old enough to use the web they can be proud to know that’s who they call mommy every single fucking day.

    (I’m going out on a limb here saying that she’s already got one bastard child because well, she probably has 2)

    • Jon and Kate plus Haiti

      no no no wtf when a good girl like that swallows the baby-batter then there is no baby

      and where does one go to learn to be a vagina electrician? Is there a certificate for that?

  27. Cnickel
    Commented on this photo:

    Chest pimple/herpes. Just sayin.

  28. Oh, Hai!
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that Kim or Khloe Kardashian?

  29. Jack Mykokov
    Commented on this photo:

    I think the dildo chick should win, because she’s demonstrating the one thing that most of the “celebrities” on this site are any good at: SUCKING BLACK DICK!

  30. Spanxx
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that Randal with the big black cock in his mouth?

  31. Its Angela, not Randal but...
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve been reading this blog since it started and yes that’s exactly what Fish means. I thought that was ridiculously obvious.

  32. Gene
    Commented on this photo:

    May I apply for the position of vagina electrician please?

    And wtf is undoubtedly gay.

  33. captain america

    those lips fit a cock extremely well, folks!!

  34. Kim Kardashian
    Commented on this photo:

    Look at her oily, bulbous nose. She is disgusting! Put on some damn make-up, woman! Ew! xoxo Kim

  35. Pork
    Commented on this photo:

    LOOK AT THAT GIANT ZIT IN THE MIDDLE OF HER CHEST

  36. wantsHerBACK

    Bring back the old Superficial girl.

  37. Rhialto

    Excellent,excellent folks! It’s always good to know who or what our audience is.As far as i can see,to my delight,these are well educated good christian girls with diverse hobbies.

  38. Gando

    These might be the first non-airbrushed pics ever posted here.Congrats?

  39. Darth

    I guess we’re getting prepared for the latest promotional LiLo pics?

  40. TiTi
    Commented on this photo:

    hasnt anyone else noticed the ugly ass black toe looking things holding the electronic black dildo?! i mean granted i looked at the slutty face/dildo in mouth first, and yes im a girl, but im sorry….those man-toe nastys are SO very disturbing…
    (ps-shit, if youre gonna take a “sexy pic” a la dildo in mouth, ESPECIALLY one thats being sent to a website…at least clean yourself up and try not to look like a crackhead! put on some make up or something! at least thats my feminine opinion..lol)

  41. cocolover

    hi

  42. Commented on this photo:

    Some people have to hit rock bottom before they reach out for help.
    I sure hope this was voluntary. That would be icky, but better than being held prisoner by some gang in an inner city basement.
    Thank U for the star on this image. Gave me time to take that needed deep breath.

  43. Kris
    Commented on this photo:

    If that’s “giant,” I am clearly overdue for a career in porn. How much do dudes make again? Oh, right, they’re not in it for the money. NOW what am I gonna tell my wife?

  44. Did the fugly, drunken alley way looking bitch with the dildo stuffed in her mouth NOT read the DIRECTIONS??? What a whore.

  45. jacob
    Commented on this photo:

    WHAT the hell is that Orange crap inside her mouth, between the dildo and the corner of her mouth, this weird orange something, what the HELL is that???
    her tongue?

    Here she was, making a joke at the Superficial’s expense, sending a picture like this to freak him out,

    Now the joke’s on her, seeing how she is famous for this picture, and this is being seen by hundreds, maybe thousands of people, worst this is that she did this to herself,
    So i get that she is into black dudes ah???

    im white but i would LOVE to put my penis in her mouth, touch her boobs

  46. Fati87
    Commented on this photo:

    Fish, I think this one is trying to entice you. She is hinting that could be you.

  47. tkumarr
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t think so,we do need a girl who use diido to make her night colorful but to real one………Out Out Out………..

  48. jacob

    WHO is the Girl in the Picture now????
    I always thought it was Hayden Panettiere, the Girl From Heroes,
    Her lips look the same,

    Actually, I like the new picture A lot more than the old one,
    And I Am REALLY sad that is going to be changed,
    if it is changed then i hope is a brand new girl, and not the old picture

    WHO is the girl from the pic now?

  49. Britany
    Commented on this photo:

    How do you get the star off?

  50. jessluv
    Commented on this photo:

    just wondering how it is no one pointed out the nasty ass pimple on that girls chest that looks like its gonna explode. this pic is not hot, its effing gross!

Leave A Comment