The Return of The Most Important People on The Internet

January 3rd, 2011 // 98 Comments

LET THE YEAR OF THE BONER BEGIN!

Welcome to the eighth installment of The Most Important People on The Internet. Full Disclosure: There was supposed to be one of these the Monday after Christmas, but honestly, there wasn’t much to work with and I promised myself I’d be an even shiftlessier layabout than usual this holiday season. No one likes a liar. However, I do want to acknowledge commenter “Jones” for brilliantly dubbing Coco’s camel toe the “Bantha Knuckle,” so please add that one to our national lexicon alongside “Wookiee Wallet” for we are now richer for both. On that note, enjoy this week’s collection complete with the best comment saved for last because it’s so poetic, we very well might be in the presence of our generation’s Shakespeare. I literally sobbed after reading it.

Parting is such sweet sorrow,

- The Superficial

Click Here to Start The Gallery

Photo: Flynet

superficial

  1. Amber Portwood
    Billy
    Commented on this photo:

    He/She/It looks exactly like the dump I took this morning.

  2. Amber Portwood
    Billy
    Commented on this photo:

    Actually I take that back… my shit is better looking.

  3. Paris Hilton Bikini
    Billy
    Commented on this photo:

    old man ass

  4. Santa's Claus

    The one in the pink with the tits is the mother. The one in the shorts with the boner is her son.

  5. Stephanie Seymour
    Kelly
    Commented on this photo:

    First

  6. American

    Milfalicious!

  7. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Mercy Me
    Commented on this photo:

    “I would drag my salt-covered pecker through miles of broken glass just to hear her fart through a walkie talkie”

    This comment originated in a 4chan thread a few months ago when Ironman 2 came out. OP pic was Scarlett Johansen and the original comment was “>personally; i’d crawl butt naked through a mile of broken glass just to hear her fart through a wakie-talkie *green text*”

    I remember that comment because, well, you don’t forgot funny shit like that

    Do we have a plagiarist in our mists?

  8. Stephanie Seymour
    Paloma
    Commented on this photo:

    Moms has a banging body for her age. No wonder why junior has a woody.

  9. Octomom Bikini
    Mercy Me
    Commented on this photo:

    Bring back SGU

  10. lightdragon

    looks like the beginning of a real life “Taboo ” movie.

  11. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Mercy Me
    Commented on this photo:

    *midsts*
    eh, just wanted to point it out to Fish

  12. Stephanie Seymour
    Ed
    Commented on this photo:

    That picture is disturbing yet hot at the same time.

    That kid must be packing a tiny weeny, cause that stiffy is pathetic.

  13. Stephanie Seymour Bikini
    Ed
    Commented on this photo:

    This is so disturbing and hot! I can’t believe she’s banging her SON!

  14. Turtle

    Nice one, Mom.

  15. Stephanie Seymour
    MALE
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d blow that kid any old day….cute hardon….then I’d blow my load all over his chest.

  16. bimbamboing

    We’re moving on anyway. Success with that!

    • Gando

      *Tired voice* We came a long way, we went straight into hell without any trace of fear. After epic and heroic fights with Balrogs ( in my case) we kept on marching all the way through. Covered with battle wounds but still with heads up we landed finally, to our big surprise, in The Garden of Eden. Hell forced us to study and learn a lot. Usually the winner takes it all. Leaving people behind with even more hate and foam around the mouth. Losing that’s an art as well, for that you’ve to be a winner. But we don’t want to be part of that vicious circle, feeding and maintaining hate. We didn’t do this all on purpose of revenge. This was a surprise journey to us as well. All what we did fight for was the truth and nothing else than that. And we keep on fighting for that even if that leads to our dead. And finally we’re going to move on indeed.

      • God

        The Flower is mine but you can take the fruits.

      • Gando

        If your faith is big enough then you know that the real God won’t do ofcourse anything really bad. It’s safe and sound and he’s always trying to make things clear.

  17. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Danklin
    Commented on this photo:

    First of all why would your pecker be covered in salt?

  18. Stephanie Seymour Bikini
    shmatt
    Commented on this photo:

    The guy is a freaking Billionare, lets face it- He can do way better

  19. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    ac
    Commented on this photo:

    That one’s been knocking around at least 20 years.

  20. Mike Walker

    ♫ He does it all, yes he does
    He knows how to please in every detail
    He can do more than you’d ever imagine
    And do it with style, he does it with me, oh yes he does… ♪

  21. Stephanie Seymour
    Bi Guy
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t be fooled, that ain’t no hard on. That’s a bulge, kid is packin’

  22. Snooki New Years Eve Ball
    Megan
    Commented on this photo:

    This was from Weekend Update on SNL…

  23. Stephanie Seymour
    Barry
    Commented on this photo:

    Not sure what is going on there?

    • MALE

      She’s trying to get his swimmers open so she can pull out his dick, Barry. Wouldn’t you do the same thing?? I mean, really……..

  24. wim

    he is trying to hide his stiff little P*NIS caused by her appearence!!

  25. Stephanie Seymour
    No woody
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry, guys… but the kid is playing on the other team
    http://www.papermag.com/2010/09/peter_brant_jr_the_new_it-boy.php

    • Mike

      There’s nothing on that link that says or even suggests the kid is gay.

      Why is everybody assuming that the kid is boning up over mom? Let’s not forget she’s not the only girl on the beach. There’s another girl hidden right behind her.

    • JOHN

      White pants, legs crossed, hands on thigh like a girl and wearing a purple ascot, for Christ sake… Gay as a meatball… By the way, why is his mommy adjusting his shorts for him? Can’t he do that himself? What is he, a 5 year old???

  26. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Cartdaddydollaz
    Commented on this photo:

    My dad always used to say this but he would say “I crawl ten miles through broken glass and bb’s to watch her piss in a tin can in a phone booth.” lol

  27. Octomom Bikini
    TDog
    Commented on this photo:

    What, you mean full of an entire downtrodden culture of poor people living in tents subsisting on only what the overseers provide? Sounds about right.

    For god’s sake, get Spader out of there, though.

  28. new here

    Oh dear! Did mommy do that to you?

  29. Octomom Bikini
    Mortimer Duke
    Commented on this photo:

    yes! Loved this comment!

  30. Miley Cyrus
    Jenny
    Commented on this photo:

    Best comment I’ve seen yet on here!

  31. The Listener

    She is WAY too close to his penis while he’s got that hard-on. Poor kid. He has to be embarrassed.

    • The Listener

      It just occured to me that maybe he’s not aroused, but the trunks are so wet, it’s just clinging really tight to his skin.

  32. The Listener

    Funny. This just made me think of that photo of Hulk Hogan putting sunscreen on his daughter Brooke’s butt.

    In my opinion, some parents are just a little too comfortable with their kids’ bodies.

  33. anonymous

    Mom’s definitely giving him wood.

    You guys have to see the rest of the pics in the set. The oldest kid and mom are way too friendly on the beach. They are hugging and sideways kissing; it looks like they are on a date.

  34. Me

    Might as well keep it in the family…

  35. Stephanie Seymour Bikini
    zilly
    Commented on this photo:

    *wretching* The horror………*wretching* the horror!!!

  36. Stephanie Seymour
    jbfromptown
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude has on white pants, and crosses his legs like a Biotch. GAY!

  37. Hugh Hefner Crystal Harris
    Life Serial
    Commented on this photo:

    Maybe she’s not a gold digger. Maybe she just has a fetish for wrinkled things, like Shar Pei faces, elephant knees, and soggy old man wangs.

  38. Octomom Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t get over her face looking like an alien hybrid of Steven Tyler and a brick wall.

  39. Natalie Portman Pregnant
    Slick Rick
    Commented on this photo:

    lol nice

  40. Hugh Gentry

    what kid wouldn’t get a boner looking at those tits all afternoon? On top of that, her hands are a few inches away from his cock…I’m sure he got rid of the baby batter later that day.

  41. Steelerchick

    What’s with this kid getting a boner for his mother?? ICK!!!!!

  42. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    craigj
    Commented on this photo:

    Plagiarist or not, it’s still the funniest thing I’ve read on the net in a couple of months!

  43. Amber Portwood
    hugh
    Commented on this photo:

    hahahahahahahaha

  44. friendlyfires

    You know, Seth McFarland and his writers read the Superficial comments for break away jokes and punchlines.

  45. Snooki New Years Eve Ball
    eh
    Commented on this photo:

    That comment was funnier on SNL

  46. Katy Perry Without Makeup
    reformed_druid
    Commented on this photo:

    This woman looks disgusting. And news flash guys her boobs aren’t as big as you think they are either. False advertising only.

  47. Snooki New Years Eve Ball
    Clueless
    Commented on this photo:

    Disqualified!

  48. Amber Portwood
    chyo mama
    Commented on this photo:

    beautiful shiny hair

  49. Paris Hilton Bikini
    chyo mama
    Commented on this photo:

    aww poor paris, Paris who?

    U maybe a Hilton but you ain’t no Kardashian

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