The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 51

November 12th, 2011 // 135 Comments

Welcome to the 51st installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, a gathering of the terrible shit you see in the threads throughout the week that give me pause to reflect on the human spirit. I’m kidding, I just laugh and go, “Haha! It’s true. Christina Aguilera IS fat.” It’s all very intellectual. On that note, my personal favorite comment – After the one at the end of this gallery, of course. – has to be from jsburg who actually feels the firing of Joe Paterno for doing close to jackshit while children were raped is a grave Constitutional violation and the beginning of the end of America as we know it. Because if football isn’t treated like a holy and sacred institution, then my God, what is? We might as well be under British rule again.

Don’t tread on me,

- The Superficial

P.S. Also, add every single perverted children’s book title JC came up with in the Sasha Grey thread. Jesus Christ, are they amazing.

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: GSI Media

superficial

  1. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison
    Lisa
    Commented on this photo:

    Why haven’t her parents thrown in jail for allowing this embarrassment? This girl is such a shell of a person. Shame on her parents for giving up on her and shame on that old guy (re: husband) for taking advantage of her blind eagerness to be famous.

  2. Lindsay Lohan
    Guy Rossi
    Commented on this photo:

    Mickey Rourke is kinda hot

  3. Kris Jenner
    Youdrink Waytoomutch
    Commented on this photo:

    Uranus? Hmm…

  4. Rihanna Butt Zebra Stripes Twitter
    ooooh
    Commented on this photo:

    her ass is wide and flat, disgusting.

  5. Lindsay Lohan
    Crankybitch
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s such a waste. I should have the housekeeper use her as a mop.

  6. Kris Jenner
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well, Kim and Kendall like to use their teeth, and kourtney won’t do it at all, but khloe and i do it like this…”

  7. Jonathan Lipnicki Shirtless Workout
    Buddy the Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    It looks like he is running from Judaism.

  8. Lindsay Lohan
    Buddy the Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    HIDEOUS.

  9. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    BAHAH
    Commented on this photo:

    She changed her occupation – from singer to clown.

  10. Rihanna Butt Zebra Stripes Twitter
    BAHAH
    Commented on this photo:

    Rihanna annoys the shit out of me.

  11. Liam Neeson Peed His Pants
    vlad
    Commented on this photo:

    *standing ovation*

  12. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison
    lida
    Commented on this photo:

    her bathing suit is the victoria’s secret bombshell bikini…its selling point is that it raises you two cup sizes. looks absolutely stupid on this useless cocksack. go choke on a dick, princess

    • dotmatrix

      You’re right. You can really see it in action in this pic, her little sandbags are really being forced into position.

  13. Chauncey

    You people are so messed-up about this couple. Let’s say she is 16/17. By law, in any of the fifty states she would have to have, at the bare minimum, her parent’s blessing and agreement for this wedding to be legal. Now, if she has been legally emancipated than all bets are off…

    I believe all the crap about this couple is related to the uneasy feeling you all hold about your past relationships with your family members!!!

    Again, if this relationship was illegal the authorities would have already stepped in!

    Now — irregardless of what I just said — I am a big X-files fan and I find Courtney’s incoherent interviews extremely arousing.

    • CranAppleSnapple

      Chauncey, let go of your cousin’s boob.
      And guess what isn’t a word? Irregardless. Not a word.

  14. Liam Neeson Peed His Pants
    Brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this in reference to something, or is it just awesome?

  15. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison
    Commented on this photo:

    I though the whole point in trying to legitimize your child-molesting cravings by marrying a child-bride was to have a bride who looks like a child. How does Skankie McLeatherglobes come into that equation?

  16. Lindsay Lohan
    imabrat
    Commented on this photo:

    What a grotesque individual.

  17. Karen

    This man has to stop trying so hard to be sexy…

  18. She is trying to hard and i hope that guy eat shit because he is a douchbag and more and also her boobs are to big for her head!!!

  19. Liam Neeson Peed His Pants
    Manowl
    Commented on this photo:

    From “Taken”. I admit I had to look it up:
    I don’t know who you are. I don’t know what you want. If you are looking for ransom, I can tell you I don’t have money. But what I do have are a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you let my daughter go now, that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you. But if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you, and I will kill you.

  20. Lindsay Lohan
    puzzled
    Commented on this photo:

    She as adorable as a child . . . and then . . . Hoolyweird.
    So sad. Only the strong survive.

  21. Lindsay Lohan
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d hit it…PS Can you stop blogging on this picture as it disturbs my masturbation. Wanks very much

  22. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    Great tits. Horrendous chin action. Act-chin even?

  23. Katie Holmes
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    I remember when she was happy.

  24. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage Shane Warne
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    I would kill for that

  25. Liam Neeson Peed His Pants
    arnieblackblack
    Commented on this photo:

    Very good

  26. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage Shane Warne
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy shit, that’s hilarious!

  27. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    occam's boner
    Commented on this photo:

    And I’ve been waiting for bloggers to quit with the tired Mrs Doubtfire refs for seven months!
    Who’s picking the winners here? Dat fucking Phan?? WTF

  28. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison
    454-Castel Holly
    Commented on this photo:

    Wearing those high heels in the sand? I don’t really think so, it’s quite rare to wear that in the beach, pretty bad walking traction.

  29. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:

    That is fucking nasty, what a waste

  30. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    Commented on this photo:

    Maybe after years of having to be skinny and fit she just wants to eat cake and cruise on her talent for a little while

  31. Lindsay Lohan
    john_thomas
    Commented on this photo:

    Afew years back she was really hot; now…not so much.

  32. Rihanna Butt Zebra Stripes Twitter
    Nina
    Commented on this photo:

    Gotta love that ass!

  33. Rihanna Butt Zebra Stripes Twitter
    Shaniqua
    Commented on this photo:

    sideshow bob

  34. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    Diggy
    Commented on this photo:

    Is it me or is Dog the Bounty Hunter’s wife lookin good… mmm mmm

  35. Liam Neeson Peed His Pants
    sweet princess
    Commented on this photo:

    amazing.

  36. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison
    Lisa
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she talking to her boob? Coaxing it to puff up more or something?

  37. Courtney Stodden Bikini Doug Hutchison
    Tromba
    Commented on this photo:

    Either of these are good bets in a death pool.

  38. Kate Gosselin
    Chupacabra
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha. She’s a receptionist now!!

  39. Russell Brand
    Bigblue
    Commented on this photo:

    is he the caveman in the Gieco adds

  40. Russell Brand
    riptide
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t believe Katy Perry lets this climb on top of her. She must have some self esteem issues or something.

  41. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    riptide
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember the Dirrty and Candyman videos? Let’s hope Beyonce has more pride than to let herself go like this after the baby.

  42. Katie Holmes
    riptide
    Commented on this photo:

    Another woman Tom sucked the life out of.

  43. Mariah Carey Midriff Weight Loss Jenny Craig
    riptide
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing strange to see here folks! Keep moving! No trick photography whatsoever.

  44. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage Shane Warne
    riptide
    Commented on this photo:

    She always looked great.. Here is to aging gracefully. Hear that Megan Fox?

  45. Mariah Carey Midriff Weight Loss Jenny Craig
    Anon
    Commented on this photo:

    She does look computer generated…

  46. Christina Aguilera Cleavage Fat Cheeks
    PinkyT
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, did she put tanning spray in her HAIR?

  47. Arnold Scwarzenegger
    Drew
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugly sweater. Check.
    Eating a Jello Pudding Pop. Check.
    White. Wait a second…

  48. Kate Gosselin
    furrylittleewok
    Commented on this photo:

    hahahaha! ya know she has to pay the rent somehow

  49. Lindsay Lohan
    Nug
    Commented on this photo:

    Playboy’s photoshopper is gonna be real busy.

  50. Lindsay Lohan
    Bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    Lindsay Lohan replaces Eric Stoltz in Mask II

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