The Most Important People On The Internet:
Volume 3.34

October 19th, 2013 // 34 Comments

Welcome to the return of The Most Important People on The Internet, our shit-tastic grab-bag of tomshittery you little shitters shit in the comments. You had to make do last week with Chrissy Teigen and Brooklyn Decker‘s Vagina Raspberry on account of a comment deficit – Thanks, Obama. – but this time I won’t make you watch two beautiful models make drunken queefing (queeving?) sounds because we’ve got a splendid bounty of ridiculous. On that note, special thanks to all the usual suspects: McFeely, Georgio, Crouton, etc., and to a surprising amount of newcomers who bravely stepped forward to make jokes about Justin Bieber living under LL Cool J‘s penis. You’re doing God’s work.

- The Superficial

Photo: FameFlynet

superficial

  1. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Sideboob Swimsuit Selfie
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Awesome comments this week.

  2. Kathleen Turner Fat Neck Neck Rolls Womens Media Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Now i must watch Monsters Inc again. Thank you:

  3. Cynthia Nixon Yawning Morgan Freeman Life Itself Set
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Jeezus…that’s awful, and yet it made me LOL.

  4. Lacey Wildd Huge Fake Cleavage Holding Pumpkins
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    You can’t call those tits, they are just TOO big.

  5. Jessica Simpson Cleavage
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s got nice tits and a whole lotta money…there, fixed it for you.
    You left out the most important part.

  6. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Sideboob Swimsuit Selfie
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    MOO

  7. Cynthia Nixon Yawning Morgan Freeman Life Itself Set
    AnnaD.
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahahaha

  8. Lena Dunham Milking Cow Billy on the Street
    Mangina
    Commented on this photo:

    Perfection

  9. Kathleen Turner Fat Neck Neck Rolls Womens Media Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Brilliant!

  10. Dave Chappelle Signing Female Fans Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    The comment was amazing.

    The chick’s knockers are fantastic.

  11. Jenny McCarthy Donnie Wahlberg A Night With Janis Joplin Broadway Opening Night Afterparty
    no
    Commented on this photo:

    Jenny was annoying before it was cool.

  12. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Sideboob Swimsuit Selfie
    ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    LOLOLOLOL

  13. Lena Dunham Milking Cow Billy on the Street
    Commented on this photo:

    I wish we could ‘like’ the MOPOTI pictures. I like to show that enjoyment was had, but they aren’t the sort of posts that lend themselves to comments.

  14. Jenny McCarthy Donnie Wahlberg A Night With Janis Joplin Broadway Opening Night Afterparty
    Commented on this photo:

    Ha!

  15. Gillian Anderson David Duchovny X-Files Panel Comic-Con
    Commented on this photo:

    True story.

  16. Lena Dunham Milking Cow Billy on the Street
    Dick Feet
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is she milking Kanye’s wife, that kim pig?

  17. Lacey Wildd Huge Fake Cleavage Holding Pumpkins
    LA Juice
    Commented on this photo:

    See???? Mommy’s boobies are as big as Daddies nuts.

  18. Leah Remini Huge Butt Sweatpants DWTS Practice
    LA Juice
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh Leah. We were so proud of you when you escaped Scientology, but be careful. Is it really worth it to try and smuggle Willow and Jada out too?

  19. Arnold Schwarzenegger Sylvester Stallone
    Commented on this photo:

    Fucking awesome ’cause it’s probably true.

  20. Cynthia Nixon Yawning Morgan Freeman Life Itself Set
    Commented on this photo:

    *dead*

  21. Wayne Gretzky Yellow Tooth 10th Annual Alfred Mann Foundation Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    LOLing & wanting to take a bleach shower at the same time = TheSuperficial specialty.

  22. Russell Simmons Common 12 Years A Slave Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    AAAAHAHAHA!!!

  23. Leah Remini Huge Butt Sweatpants DWTS Practice
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, WTF?

  24. Terrence Howard White Suit Scarf Colorful Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    GOTS to be Billy D. William’s Studio 54 bathroom bastard child.

  25. LL Cool J Holding Mic To Crotch The Big Fresno Fair
    Commented on this photo:

    And another caption that’s funny ’cause it’s true.

  26. Ireland Baldwin Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    *cries*laughs*cries*

  27. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Sideboob Swimsuit Selfie
    Commented on this photo:

    Fun house mirrors are the new orange/black/whatever.

  28. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Spanx DASH Store
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought she’d got thinner.

  29. Cynthia Nixon Yawning Morgan Freeman Life Itself Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice work Fred.

  30. Bruce Jenner Creepy Face
    Forphel
    Commented on this photo:

    Genius.

  31. Bruce Jenner Creepy Face
    Ginger Fail
    Commented on this photo:

    Funny, his face has turned into a Wheatie.

  32. Lena Dunham Milking Cow Billy on the Street
    Commented on this photo:

    Who has the saggier teats, Bessie the Bovine or Lena the Bridge Troll?

    PS Nice outfit honey…you have to try to be that unattractive!

  33. Lena Dunham Milking Cow Billy on the Street
    Walter White
    Commented on this photo:

    Hideous, untalented bitch is hideous and untalented.

  34. Dave Chappelle Signing Female Fans Cleavage
    Edvard Munch
    Commented on this photo:

    Why do fat girls think their sloppy, saggy tits are sexy?

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