The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 3.1

January 19th, 2013 // 85 Comments

Welcome to the triumphant, jam-packed return of The Most Important People on The Internet and while this week’s installment is extra-loaded, it’s not because I included comments from the week from hell, but because at least 20 of these were from Monday. 20. So a special thanks to you little deviants for being the Viagra for this edition’s word-boner. On a less-penis-jokey note, I want to call out the real winner of the Internet this week and it’s 19-year-old Zack Kopplin who’s making an actual difference in this backwoods country instead of flopping around the floor of a church gym on Wednesday nights pretending he’s possessed by his imaginary friend’s ghost. (Wow, that came off salty.) So screw Manti Te’o. Screw Megan Fox. Screw Taylor Swift. This kid’s story is the Jon Hamm’s penis tits. I love tits. Ahaha!

‘The hell’s a Freudian slip?

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

superficial

  1. Quentin Tarantino Django Unchained Premiere
    Mark
    Commented on this photo:

    Batman 1989! Nice reference.

  2. Noah Cyrus Pale Face Hooker Dress 13th Birthday Party
    Smylex
    Commented on this photo:

    I get a grin, again and again

  3. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Position
    Commented on this photo:

    Ha ha! Nice.

  4. Sarah Hyland 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    karlito
    Commented on this photo:

    it’s kind of sad when ordinary looking, flat chested girls try too hard to look super sexy and wild. she’s smashing those little cupcakes together like she’s trying to make a cake. she must be devastated that she’s 22 yrs old and her two 40 something co-stars and her 14 yr old co-star are sexier looking than her.

  5. Amanda Bynes Cheek Piercing Tumblr
    Edvard Munch
    Commented on this photo:

    Its so glamorous. The cheek pierce says both “look at me” and “I’m ashamed of myself”.

  6. Jeremy Renner Sunglasses Film Independent Filmmaker Grant And Spirit Awards Nominees Brunch
    Edvard Munch
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know whose the bigger douche. The guy in the photo or the guy writing a comment of said guy saying he has an imaginary black Lexus.

  7. Mark Wahlberg Toasting Wine Glasses With Fat Guy
    Nico
    Commented on this photo:

    This is great

  8. Mark Wahlberg Toasting Wine Glasses With Fat Guy
    coyote
    Commented on this photo:

    Say hello to your Mother for Me

  9. Jennifer Lopez 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  10. Sarah Hyland 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d frost those cupcakes for her.

  11. James Caan Bloated Red Face
    HumpinFrog
    Commented on this photo:

    ?

  12. Axl Rose Scarf Hat Cane
    shemp
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, Sam Kinison looks pretty good with a moustache…

  13. Mel Gibson Crazy Eyes WB In Style Golden Globe After Party
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry, folks. I didn’t write this one.

  14. Jessica Chastain 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Perfect.

  15. Jennifer Lopez 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    LOL!

  16. Dave Navarro Naked Bloody Peta Ad Animal Testing
    Commented on this photo:

    I agree completely.

  17. Larsa Pippen Scotty Pippen Lady Gaga Dead Taylor Kinney Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s fucking beautiful.

  18. Sarah Hyland 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s fucking beautiful.

  19. Axl Rose Scarf Hat Cane
    Commented on this photo:

    LOL!

  20. Quentin Tarantino Django Unchained Premiere
    Lea
    Commented on this photo:

    wanna marry whoever wrote that comment !! genius looool

  21. Amanda Bynes Cheek Piercing Tumblr
    kaylia
    Commented on this photo:

    am i the only person who cannot see any of the captions aside from the first one?. the pictures slide but the caption stays the same -_-

    • Refresh after skipping to the next picture. Kind of defeats the point of having a no-load system that people supposedly wants, but whatever.

  22. Molly Ringwald
    Commented on this photo:

    lol!

  23. Sarah Hyland 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Sandoucheky
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, this just made my day

  24. Amanda Bynes Cheek Piercing Tumblr
    disapointed
    Commented on this photo:

    The next button is not changing the captions…..whos the n00b that posted this one?!?! They will work is you launch each individual picture from the home page…..

  25. Jessica Chastain 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    totally dig this chick, but it kinda looks like she’s balding here. hope its just the picture. :/

  26. Larsa Pippen Scotty Pippen Lady Gaga Dead Taylor Kinney Instagram
    neen
    Commented on this photo:

    A+

  27. Daniel Craig Sunglasses Golden Globes
    Commented on this photo:

    Hoooooly shit, I almost died laughing at this one.

  28. Shanola Hampton Cleavage Audi Golden Globe Kick Off Cocktail Party
    Commented on this photo:

    It is fun when a caption carried over from the last picture still works.

  29. Jodie Marsh Bikini Six Pack Abs Dark Tan Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    The superman underwear was the only good decision here.

  30. Meredith Vieira
    alex
    Commented on this photo:

    She wishes! She’s 59…

  31. Meredith Vieira
    Commented on this photo:

    More like “Fuck you!”

  32. Erica Mena Cellulite Legs Tight Minidress
    Dish
    Commented on this photo:

    I believe it’s referred to as a sausage bottom.

  33. Amanda Bynes Cheek Piercing Tumblr
    Dick Smokehand
    Commented on this photo:

    Who has to listen to their phone/iPod in a local car ride?

  34. Sarah Hyland 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    nobody
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know this was a “dumbest” comment contest!

  35. Quentin Tarantino Django Unchained Premiere
    Cynthia
    Commented on this photo:

    Get over it, just about everyone has a foot fetish.

    • No they don’t. A lot of people have some sort of fetish, some even weirder (I know mine is), but you don’t see a lot of people (outside the porn industry) who make movies in order to satisfy their fetish. I may be taking this too far (OK, I AM), but I still haven’t gotten over Kurt Russell sucking Rosario Dawson’s toes in Death Proof…

  36. Quentin Tarantino Django Unchained Premiere
    Fishballs
    Commented on this photo:

    If they ever make a live action Family Guy movie…well…Giggity.

  37. Noah Cyrus Pale Face Hooker Dress 13th Birthday Party
    Walkaway_Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    LOL of the day!

  38. Meredith Vieira
    Dina
    Commented on this photo:

    “LEG UP” REFERENCE! Yay

  39. Simon Cowell Mezghan Hussainy Bikini Yacht
    Commented on this photo:

    Sad but [mmfff!] true.

  40. Sarah Hyland 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s absolutely adorable

  41. Larsa Pippen Scotty Pippen Lady Gaga Dead Taylor Kinney Instagram
    KC
    Commented on this photo:

    Best of the bunch

  42. James Caan Bloated Red Face
    Chinto
    Commented on this photo:

    Godfather

  43. Alexander Skarsgard Penis Golden Globe After Parties
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet! Like what’s in those slacks!

  44. John Travolta Kelly Preston GDay USA Los Angeles Black Tie Gala
    Chinto
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know which is worse, his hair or his douche beard

  45. David Hasselhoff Drunk Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Awesomeness!

  46. David Spade
    Commented on this photo:

    A+

  47. Adrian Grenier Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    money

  48. Macaulay Culkin Thin Smoking Cigarette
    Commented on this photo:

    money

  49. Amanda Bynes Cheek Piercing Tumblr
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s Amanda Bynes? My daughter and I watched an old eopisode of “The Amanda Show” the other day. She was a cute, funny little girl. I’m sorry she has turned into tabloid fodder.

  50. Jessica Chastain 70th Annual Golden Globe Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    she looks terrible. Looks like she’s gray and balding, and her dress is horribly cut for her chest. Her breasts are small and sit high, but the cut of the dress is saggy and low.

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