The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 2.16

April 14th, 2012 // 97 Comments

Welcome to this week’s installment of The Most Important People on The Internet, a collection of your comments that simultaneously makes me laugh and makes first time visitors wonder if they’ve stumbled upon a retard site for retards. (Maybe.) On that note, you might want to mentally prepare yourself for reading the worst thing anything could possibly say about Charlize Theron. I literally balked only to turn around and include it because pageviews are my pimp and I am but its lowly whore.

I’m back on the curb, I’m back on the curb! Jesus…

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Splash News

superficial

  1. Hugh Jackman Deborra-Lee Furness
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha

  2. Charlize Theron
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, I didn’t mean to be mean. But I saw the thumbnail, thought it was January Jones, and decided to go with that.

    • I hear Charlize has a pretty healthy sense of humor; this came off more as a comment on January’s everyday frozen-over demeanor than Theron’s airport deadpan.

  3. Hugh Jackman Deborra-Lee Furness
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice!

  4. Robert Wagner
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    Bob has been grinding that ax so long, he still refuses to spell Walken’s name correctly, even when he speaks it.

  5. Mark Wahlberg Shirtless Bathing Suit Rhea Durham Bikini
    hey
    Commented on this photo:

    I cant tell which one you are talking about.

  6. Kanye West
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    Brilliant!

  7. Elijah Wood
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    There were “brothas’ in Middle Earth, and Peter Jackson had them all play orcs.

  8. Britney Spears Jason Trawick
    ET Phone Home
    Commented on this photo:

    BERK!

  9. Hugh Jackman Deborra-Lee Furness
    O'chunt
    Commented on this photo:

    Brilliant!

  10. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    O'chunt
    Commented on this photo:

    Hahaha!

  11. Axl Rose Lana Del Rey
    Buddy the Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    Eminem is finally growing out his hair?

  12. Charlize Theron
    Buddy the Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    Cute how they coordinated boots.

  13. Britney Spears Jason Trawick
    dooood
    Commented on this photo:

    awww isn’t she cute

  14. Kanye West
    dooood
    Commented on this photo:

    they should make a remake except with kanye playing the retard

  15. Billy Zane
    Commented on this photo:

    Should I be depressed at the level of satisfaction and vindication I feel at making most important people for the first time?

  16. Kanye West
    Remz
    Commented on this photo:

    Wouldn’t require much acting then :-D

  17. Octomom
    Popeye
    Commented on this photo:

    You must pay the toll to cross the bridge!

  18. Courtney Love
    fartykins
    Commented on this photo:

    true dat

  19. shelly

    wow, I lover her body. She was great in YOGAPEOPLEMEET

  20. Britney Spears Jason Trawick
    Jamito
    Commented on this photo:

    Hi Y’all! How d’ya like my new tablecloth?

  21. Britney Spears Jason Trawick
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    hey ya’ll. how you like my good hand?

  22. Axl Rose Lana Del Rey
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    sometimes it’s better to die young.

  23. Hayden Panettiere Bikini Tennis Scotty McKnight
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    somewhere a 13 year old boy just got an erection. the rest of us yawned.

  24. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    He has to choose a diamond ring this big.

  25. Elijah Wood
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    Saruman all up in my coolaid talking ’bout don’t know the flavor . . . .

  26. Hugh Jackman Deborra-Lee Furness
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    Wolverine needs more dance kicks!

  27. Kanye West
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    she was all “waz up?” and I was like “yo you got a fat blouse!”

  28. Elizabeth Berkley
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    somewhere in the world a 13 year old boy just . . .aw forget it.

  29. Teen Mom Leah Messer Jeremy Calvert Married
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    this chick looks like every cashier at the Royal Farms.

  30. Mark Wahlberg Shirtless Bathing Suit Rhea Durham Bikini
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    So let a terrorist try and blow up the ocean . . cuase I’m ready!

  31. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ya ya, it was funny when she pushed out the baby and it looked like me!” (in heavy Austrian accent)

  32. Octomom
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    “This is my ‘O’ face!”

  33. Samantha Ronson
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    you know I never believed it before, but maybe sometimes God does make mistakes.

  34. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey guys. I see the bulges in your pants.”

  35. Ashley Judd
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’ll pay you $10 if you can get an erection.”

  36. Billy Zane
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    My greatest acting role was in Zoolander.

  37. Hayden Panettiere Bikini Scotty McKnight
    kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    “woot! woot!”

  38. Mark Wahlberg Shirtless Bathing Suit Rhea Durham Bikini
    Grand Poobah
    Commented on this photo:

    nothing in the belly, just one in the trunk

  39. Octomom
    Grand Poobah
    Commented on this photo:

    nice boots on the octotwat, lots of snow around I see

  40. Axl Rose Lana Del Rey
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah, gimme 500 extra hot buffalo wings. Oh, and a diet coke. I’m watchin’ my weight.”

  41. Hayden Panettiere Bikini Tennis Scotty McKnight
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t know strip-tennis existed.

  42. Octomom
    CranAppleSnapple
    Commented on this photo:

    There is so much wrong with her proportions. It’s as though she was kneeling on her shoes, trying to look like a child.

  43. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    CranAppleSnapple
    Commented on this photo:

    WOOF.

  44. Kanye West
    Haddo01
    Commented on this photo:

    ahahahahah. When I first saw the picture I thought “Shrimp cocktail”

  45. Kanye West
    Marie
    Commented on this photo:

    I see the douche nozzle but where is the douche hose?

  46. Hayden Panettiere Bikini Tennis Scotty McKnight
    Burt
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like a dude in this picture.

  47. Brooklyn Decker
    zomgbie
    Commented on this photo:

    courtney?

  48. Britney Spears Jason Trawick
    Vik
    Commented on this photo:

    Gary Busey?

  49. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Grand Poobah
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t sit down in the car right now because last night it was this long and it hurt..

  50. Octomom
    Grand Poobah
    Commented on this photo:

    gawd, she looks like she is going down again…

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