The Most Important People on The Internet:
Volume 2.13

March 24th, 2012 // 122 Comments

After a two-week hiatus, welcome to the triumphant return of The Most Important People on The Internet which is stuffed to the gills with your horrible, celebrity-induced mind-sharts. And, seriously, you guys brought the goods this week, so I’m going to step right the fuck out of the way and let you dive into the gallery that gave me an asshole of time trying to decide who gets the coveted last spot which I’m already thinking about changing to the Michael Bolton one. Or, no, the Jon Hamm app one.

Goddammit,

- The Superficial

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet

superficial

  1. Jessica Simpson
    ali
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha!

  2. Kevin Smith
    Commented on this photo:

    I loled heartily and knowingly.

  3. Snooki Bikini Pregnant
    Coffee
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not sure if that’s snooki or the other one, but it needs to be milked.

  4. Snooki Bikini Pregnant
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s Snooki?
    Well it’s almost noon on a Saturday, I suppose I can start drinking now.

  5. Tara Reid Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does she do this? If it’s just a simple cry for attention is there any way to do it without hurting my eyes so?

  6. Josh Hutcherson
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I has no idea that Pumpkinhead’s cocktoy was so tall.

  7. Courtney Love
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    George Lucas must have left Death Star hookers on the cutting room floor. Just one of many mistakes made with that franchise.

  8. Jennifer Nicole Lee
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s an excess of male hormones in that one. She probably shaves stubble off of that mean mug every day.

  9. The Situation
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Drowning in a bathtub? Liver destruction via alcohol abuse and various strains of hepatitis? Car wreck? Bar fight? This weeny will not live to collect Social Security.

  10. Kevin Smith
    Commented on this photo:

    But it’s entertaining rambling and he’s giving his fans what they want.

  11. Courtney Love
    Commented on this photo:

    Laughed out loud.

  12. Michael Bolton
    DoucheMcGee
    Commented on this photo:

    I see what you did there!

  13. JWoww Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Win.

  14. Tara Reid Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Are you sure the sandwich isn’t singing, “Feed me, Tara…feed me allll night long”—specifically, feed it human blood?

  15. Olsen Twins
    radlad
    Commented on this photo:

    I lol’d

  16. The Situation
    Mike
    Commented on this photo:

    Fart

  17. Jon Hamm
    Blech
    Commented on this photo:

    LOL!

  18. Courtney Love
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    The much coveted “parlor pallor.”

  19. Paris Hilton Bikini
    Nick
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m pretty sure “bottom left girl” is Nicky Hilton. I guarantee she needed Valtrex long before this party.

  20. JWoww Bikini
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    She wrote that on her hat so if she forgets where she is all she has to do is look in the mirror. “Oh, THAT’S right, I’m in Nucnac!”

  21. Prince Charles
    Dick Hell
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa, a reference to The Prisoner. Cool.

  22. Kirsten Dunst
    suck it
    Commented on this photo:

    oooh she looks good here… it has been a few years since I have said that…

  23. Courtney Love
    suck it
    Commented on this photo:

    wtf…. she literally is looking like something from the Walking Dead. Wow. Terrible. Shoot it in the head now. NOWWW!

  24. Josh Hutcherson
    zombiegirl
    Commented on this photo:

    but…Hutch is so cute…and Tom Cruise is third thank you. Dinklage, Hutch then Cruise. But again.. HE’S JUST SO CUTE AND FUNNY I WANT TO PUT HIM IN MY POCKET AND KEEP HIM FOREVER.

  25. Jon Hamm
    zombiegirl
    Commented on this photo:

    He and Skarsgaard need to start a business for women having trouble conceiving. They just sit in a room, you pay at reception and are told where to go. You walk in, one of them looks at you and BAM! instant zygote forming.

  26. Kirsten Dunst
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    if she doesn’t smile I could hit that.

    • Cock Dr

      News flash: there are sexual positions where you don’t see the face. This has probably been a key factor in the continuing human population explosion.

  27. Courtney Love
    zombiegirl
    Commented on this photo:

    ok…I lawled. Good job.

  28. Jessica Simpson
    zombiegirl
    Commented on this photo:

    Sven Golly I think I love you.

  29. Josh Hutcherson
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Does he use a Scully box in the movie?

  30. The Situation
    Radadoon
    Commented on this photo:

    “The Situation’ doing his Weston Cage impersonation for the paparrazi… not only does he need rehab but serious mental health therapy.

  31. Snooki Bikini Pregnant
    Radadoon
    Commented on this photo:

    Apregnant Snooki looks like a minature whale…. God please forgive and protect that child… she really does not know what she does…

  32. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Radadoon
    Commented on this photo:

    I can see the sweep of Linsay’s straw mid-center right, just before someone pulled her away yelling, “Its Flour Lins, FLOUR!”

  33. Miley Cyrus
    Radadoon
    Commented on this photo:

    I mean she tries so hard, it must be tough for her knowing she will NEVER be thought of as cute again.

  34. Snooki Bikini Pregnant
    Tarkus
    Commented on this photo:

    Normally, bewbz always do it for me… Snooki proves there are exceptions to everything!

  35. Snooki Bikini Pregnant
    Grand Dragon
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d make a map of hawaii on those

    • mourning wood

      ahh yes – that cleavage looks like it’d be a nice cushy landing for a throbbing member…can’t say much else for her tho

  36. Miley Cyrus
    sweetlips
    Commented on this photo:

    Like my teef yall?

  37. Kim Kardashian Flour Bomb
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m glad this made it.

  38. Jon Hamm January Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    loved it

  39. The Situation
    squishy
    Commented on this photo:

    Just what we need…another Mario Lopez…bleh

  40. Josh Hutcherson
    squishy
    Commented on this photo:

    BAHHAHAHAHA

  41. Selena Gomez Vanessa Hudgens Spring Breakers
    Anna
    Commented on this photo:

    haha

  42. Jessica Simpson
    squishy
    Commented on this photo:

    EWOK siting! Someone tell George!!

  43. Courtney Love
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    Finally, a funny one.

  44. Kevin Smith
    Brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    Since I only watch his movies and listen to his commentary on DVDs I am still a Smith fan, but this made me laugh. Good show.

  45. Kirsten Dunst
    Brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    Lol

  46. Courtney Love
    Brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy fuuuuuuck….

  47. Goomba

    tizznitties!

  48. Jessica Simpson
    Brooke
    Commented on this photo:

    [IMG]http://i731.photobucket.com/albums/ww318/Styles_k/opera-singer.jpg[/IMG]

  49. Paris Hilton Bikini
    teagan
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah thats definitely Nicky Hilton.

  50. Snooki Bikini Pregnant
    Weaselmouse
    Commented on this photo:

    you could sweep a floor with those eyelashes.

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