The Many Court Faces of Mel Gibson

Shortly after I cashed out on Friday thanks to a Charlie Sheen overdose, Mel Gibson appeared in court where prosecutors either gave him a slap-on-the-wrist plea deal because of the precedent they set with Chris Brown (You just read that.), or simply feared dying in a courthouse fire. Regardless, his only penance to society is to do volunteer work at his ex-wife’s charity, so basically nothing. Mel Gibson was sentenced to nothing. But celebrity justice aside, at least he showed up to court and gave Lindsay Lohan a run for her money in the Who Can Give The Least Visible Fuck category while also managing to look like the anti-Semitic love child of Johnny Cash and Conway Twitty. “I wrote this one for my pa’s. It’s called ‘Women Won’t You Blow Me ‘Fore The Jacuzzi, I’m Feelin’ Mighty Arsonous.’ A here goes…”

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