The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 9.25.13

September 25th, 2013 // 381 Comments

“Alright, y’all, I don’t think the birds going to fly out. Probably shoulda paid more attention in Thailand. MEDIC.”

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed, brought to you by new Molly Shampooâ„¢ – Strengthens Roots And Feels So Fucking Awesome On My Skin Oh God It’s Like My Scalp Is Climaxing! Drugs, they’re both on a fuckton of drugs is what I’m saying. We’ve also got Gerard Butler making a waiter move his table closer to the bathroom, Peter Dinklage in need of a little assistance (I’d call for a rimshot, but I know I really deserve a slap on the face for that.), and Tom Selleck not understanding why this tiny homosexual hasn’t brought out the girl with the butt yet.

I’m not sure whether this set shot makes me happy, or really, really sad. Discuss,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Cher Cleavage Late Show With David Letterman
    Commented on this photo:

    Her handler has to watch her gimbals all day to make sure they don’t get out of whack.

  2. Amy Markham Sideboob Cleavage SBE Christmas In September Charity Event
    Rasputin's Evil Twin
    Commented on this photo:

    Nobody ever asks Santa what HE wants for Christmas, but this will certainly do nicely. No gift wrapping required.

  3. Woody Allen Grabbing Soon Yi By The Wrist Hugo Boss Store Opening
    Mcdoubler
    Commented on this photo:

    “One of these days..you’re gonna fall and break a hip and I’ll finally escape!”

  4. Corey Feldman Prostitutes Bootsy Bellows Nightclub
    Commented on this photo:

    “Wow, Charlie Sheen, you’re so awesome! I thought you were taller, though.”

  5. David Arquette Drunk Smelling Vanessa Hudgens Hair
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    The moment David Arquette quit drinking right after realizing instead of grabbing her ass he imagined grabbing a bottle of beer behind her.

  6. David Arquette Drunk Smelling Vanessa Hudgens Hair
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    It takes a masturbating Jedi to do the hands-free jerk off.

  7. Hugh Jackman
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    I recommend valium. Lots and lots of valium.

  8. Corey Feldman Prostitutes Bootsy Bellows Nightclub
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks 90 years old

  9. Hugh Jackman
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Bicycle shops must be the truck stop bathrooms of Europe.

  10. Peter Dinklage Erica Schmidt Talking To LAX Cop
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ma’am, hold on, I’m confused. Now tell me again, which one is your husband and which one is your son?”

  11. Rihanna Legs Spread High Leather Hooker Boots Perth Performance
    The Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    “Maybe they wont notice that I cant dance or sing.”

  12. Oliver Stone Untold History Of The United States 61st San Sebastian Film Festival
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Does the movie include the untold fact of history that Oliver Stone was vastly overrated?

  13. Dennis Quaid Spandex Bike Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    Dennis: “Yeah, I ride. Have been for years. Less impact on the joints than running. Feels good, too. Really gives a man…endurance, if you catch my drift. You should come do a 20-miler with me sometime, check it out, and then we could, uh, take in a little steam session in my two-person shower. Whaddaya say?”
    Daughter: “Daddy, who are you talking to?”
    Dennis: “I…no one. No one, okay? Just…just roll up the window. Daddy’s having a moment.”

  14. Woody Allen Grabbing Soon Yi By The Wrist Hugo Boss Store Opening
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the part where he breaks through the fourth wall, talks to the camera, and admits that it may have been a mistake letting her take karate classes.

  15. Woody Allen Grabbing Soon Yi By The Wrist Hugo Boss Store Opening
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    “I know she’s not much to look at now, but you had to see her when she was 11.”

    (and yes, typing that did make me sick.)

  16. Amy Markham Sideboob Cleavage SBE Christmas In September Charity Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, they’re treating those kids pretty good if they get vodka in their IVs. Only in Hollywood.

  17. Nick Carter Greeting Fans Planet Hollywood Times Square
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    5 minutes later all those girls were still untouched. But in the background someone heard ‘Giggity’ with a distinct Swedish accent.

  18. Tom Selleck Towering Over Mario Lopez Extra
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    His mustache alone has gotten laid more than Mario.

  19. Rihanna Legs Spread High Leather Hooker Boots Perth Performance
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she’s performing at a dirty sports bar in some bad cover band with a name like Hump Day or something.

  20. Gerard Butler
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now, don’t move, or it’ll hurt a lot worse. The blade’s got to cut clean through, alright? Hopefully this’ll teach you not to skimp on me coke stash, you bastard.”

  21. Nick Carter Greeting Fans Planet Hollywood Times Square
    Commented on this photo:

    that chick looks like a dude. And her Planet Hollywood jacket is so 1991

  22. Peter Dinklage Erica Schmidt Talking To LAX Cop
    Commented on this photo:

    Just a short trip probably.

  23. Toni Braxton Nipples Bra See Through Dress A Converstion With Toni Braxton And Kenny Babyface Edmonds
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks pretty good for her age…is what I thought until I found out she’s 45. She looks 45.

  24. Amy Markham Sideboob Cleavage SBE Christmas In September Charity Event
    Trek Girl
    Commented on this photo:

    Those shoes don’t go with that dress.

  25. Kirk Douglas Nick Cannon Anne Douglas
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Kirk’s whole cranial structure is in a stiff breeze.

  26. Katy Perry Wax Figure Madame Tussauds
    Commented on this photo:

    How do we know this is the wax figure and not the real Katy Perry?

  27. Amy Markham Sideboob Cleavage SBE Christmas In September Charity Event
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Dear Santa,

    For Christmas, I would like to see a woman with fake boobs and a fake ass. No, I don’t want any toys or a cure for cancer.

    Thanks, Lil’ Joey.

  28. Corey Feldman Prostitutes Bootsy Bellows Nightclub
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    I got off the bus to Hollywood and a manager met me right in the bus station! Ain’t I lucky?

  29. Sharon Stone Nipples No Bra Tank Top
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she forgot the top half of her Burger King uniform.

  30. Woody Allen Grabbing Soon Yi By The Wrist Hugo Boss Store Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    Me love you long enough already…

    • you should be invited as a commentator for award shows, then people would actually watch.

      • I’m not sure what network would want to be affiliated with my particular flavor of misogyny, misanthropy, sexism, agism, and mild racism (just a touch), but hey if they’ll write me a check, I’ll show up.

        Or if there’s a buffet.

  31. David Arquette Drunk Smelling Vanessa Hudgens Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    “You smell like raisins. I love it. Let’s see where this bottle of Goldschlager gets us…wait…where’s my bottle of goldschlager? You took it, didn’t you? You crazy bitch…”

  32. Alexander Skarsgard Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    Setting his clock for 9 months.

  33. Courtney Love Pretending To Read Poetry Book
    Commented on this photo:

    A photo of her reading a particular book has the opposite effect of making the Oprah Book Club list.

  34. Corey Feldman Prostitutes Bootsy Bellows Nightclub
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait a minute…1 hooker…2 hookers…3 hookers?? Looks like Corey finally got the 12th punch on his “Frequent Skanker’s” card.

  35. President Clinton President Obama Clinton Global Initiative Meeting
    Mitch
    Commented on this photo:

    These two, along with every other politician (Dem and Repub alike) make up the largest organized crime syndicate in the country.

    Run them all out of office.

  36. Cher Cleavage Late Show With David Letterman
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes, we see you. Hi Grandma.

  37. Hugh Jackman
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah! I know! Eau! Sounds like they’re saying ‘Oh’. Futtin’ hilarious!”

  38. Courtney Love Pretending To Read Poetry Book
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Accessorizin’.

  39. Ke$ha Buttcheeks Booty Shorts
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Kesha, Rihanna, Miley Cyrus. The good, the bad, and the ugly. OK, trick question, there is no good.

  40. Amanda Seyfried Butt Bikini Naomi Watts While We Were Young Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “Stop calling me Deep Throat!”

  41. Nick Carter Greeting Fans Planet Hollywood Times Square
    Commented on this photo:

    “Has anyone ever told you that you look like Ellen Degeneres? I mean, you have a dick, so I don’t care, but still….damn.”

  42. Alexander Skarsgard Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    “They say every 5 seconds another woman is impregnated by me. That leaves me only 4 seconds…”

  43. Corey Feldman Prostitutes Bootsy Bellows Nightclub
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s like oil. Every time we think he ran out of money we find him with two new expensive hookers.

  44. Gerard Butler
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’ll show you some ‘real wood’.”

  45. Nick Carter Greeting Fans Planet Hollywood Times Square
    Commented on this photo:

    “There is no WAY I’m letting this chick even get close to my winkie.”

  46. Nicki Minaj Nipple Slip Underboob Instagram
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s a pretty good friend who will agree to take a picture of you flashing your tits without laughing.

  47. Oliver Stone Untold History Of The United States 61st San Sebastian Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    In Stage Four Smugness, as seen here, the patient can no longer tilt their head forward, and their breathing becomes shallower and shallower as the patient is forced to contend with more and more air being distributed to the upper cheeks and eyebrow region. Sadly, there is no know cure, though some alternative and holistic medical practitioners have anecdotal evidence of rock bottom curing a small percentage of individuals diagnosed with this disease.

  48. Kirk Douglas Nick Cannon Anne Douglas
    journalschism
    Commented on this photo:

    Good to see Captain Pike getting out.

  49. Courtney Love Pretending To Read Poetry Book
    Commented on this photo:

    Just bidin’ her time until the coke dealer shows up.

  50. Woody Allen Grabbing Soon Yi By The Wrist Hugo Boss Store Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    “If I let her go, she runs. That used to be such a huge turn-on, but now, it just makes me tired. Really, really tired.”

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