I have no idea know how, but this photo is way more awesome than it has a right to be.
Welcome to the mid-week/Hump Day/teachers can’t wait for the weekend, too, because they’re giant fucking slackers, spoon-feeding our children Communism and gay marriage’s The Crap We Missed brought to you at a reasonable hour because it’s a pretty desolate celebrity landscape out there as you’ll learn by the last five photos of this post. (Do I know how to sell, or do I know how to sell?) On that note, your assignment is to tell me the word I’m trying to think of when I look at this pic of Mariah Carey doing her “ocean workout.” Whatever the technical term for battleships approaching a shore is. Beaching? Berthing? Vinnie Sandbarino-ing? I suck at military lingo.
Drop and give me 20,
- The Superficial
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
This one is titled The Calm Before The Storm, as it is snapped the moment before that bucket of piss hits them.
I realize that you have never ACTUALLY had sex Orlando, but the fact that you have to be told that it goes on the other head is just sad.
Man, that Meryl Streep is an incredible method actress!
Isn’t Paris around 50 years old now?
Ricky Gervais laughs at his own distasteful and incredibly insensitive joke about getting a double-header from the Siamese Twins (sorry, conjoined twins) behind him.
Not sure where in NYC she is, but did she just squeeze through a picket fence to get there?
Aged Pop Singer, Rick Springfield, spotted in drag in NYC earlier this Week. Details after the jump…
Backstage at The Bunny Ranch….
All the Salt in the Dead Sea couldn’t keep this heiffer afloat…
Its okay honey, mommy’s just feelin a little nuts is all!
Singer Michael Bolton finally opts for hair plugs…
Courtney Love launching her much-anticipated, boozy Comeback Tour…
without the 5 lbs of makeup and post baby tits, she looks like a retarted whore
I seriously thought this was Bradley Cooper with a wig from the thumbnail.
…With a face that only a paper bag could love…
Just admit that she looks great, people. Those abs and legs are tight!
I’ll be expecting that this movie will suck ass just like the rest
was Gymboree closed?
and here’s Demi trying way too hard to be “different”
who gives a shit about this no talent skeleton?
Seriously, all i want to do is punch this dude in the fuckin face.
this asshole looks like the walking definition of herpes
Could benefit from makeup.
nice tits, but she has herself the butterface
Nick Cannon needs to tie more rocks to her ankles….
who is she ?
I’ll second that. Really, who the hell is this girl amongst the thousands of irrelevant pseudo celebs?
Ozzy: bites the head off a big-ass chicken.
Kelly: bites the big ass of a chickenhead.
l
The look of disappointment on the face of just-over-the-should girl upon learning that Apu Nahasapeemapetilon is actually a white guy is priceless. But it’s on sale at Kwik-E-Mart, 3 for $1.99.
“It’s called a pole smoking jacket. Do you like it?”
Raspberry Beret is just a cute way of saying Prolapsed Anus which is just a technical way of saying Failed Asshole which is just an accurate way of saying Lil Wayne. What kind of douche wears a shirt with his name on it?
David Hasselhoff.
What a homo.
“Must resist eating all this fat. Am on diet”.
She looks like Mr. Burns with hair.
I didn’t know they were making a movie out of Little Mermaid.
Damn, Granma broke into Granpa’s wardrobe again.
Another one bites the dust.
JLo has gone all Method for her role as Crazy Bag Lady.
So Egyptians were part Gremlin then? They don’t teach you that in history class.
Serial killers always look so creepy when they smile.
she is so damn hot, love the dress!
I think he is cute)
I didn’t know color existed when Sid Caesar was young.
For a second there I thought David Lee Roth was wearing a dress.
“I told the plumber I wanted a BIG hottub! What the fuck is this?”
“Bent over a table … whatever you want, cutie. UHHHHHHHHHHH!!!”
Looks like somebody bumped into the windchimes again.
Jesus, those eyes are so close, when he blinks his eyelashes must get tangled up.
Briefcase AND a purse. Jimmy be going bi.
i didn’t know they made Spanx out of Kevlar
See? Jews can’t sink.
Who cares about this chick? Seriously