“And wha-la! Yeast Infection!”

Wasn’t it more of a workout for the people who kind-heartedly pushed her back into the ocean?

Can we just start calling her Harry Carey…. Makes so much more sense in conversation.

The sea was angry that day, my friends.

Oh shit a beached whale, anyone wanna push her back in?! lol

Umm, Maria…….your water broke.

Compared to her that’s a whole ocean of smart water.

Please, don’t come any closer, and thank you photographer for not zooming in.

I’m not sure that dodging harpoons counts as a workout.

I hope everyone else is staying on the beach. The water just got chummed.

RELEASE THE KRAKEN!
GET THE SACRIFICE ON!

yeah, when whales do it, it’s called “beaching”.

What a diva…she kicked out the rest of the geriatrics doing their aquarobics

You’re gonna need a bigger ocean.

The Right Whale’s tail rose majestically out of the water and paused at it’s apex, flukes spread wide, before slapping back down on the surface.

Happy happy joy joy! I got the part on the new ‘Jersey Shore’!

“Oh, great, now we know who to sue!” – Japan

When she fell off the ship the cruise passengers wondered “Which is more buoyant, her boobs or her ass”. And then they got their answer.

Not 100% sure on that military term, Fish, but I think it has something to do with dragging da bottom!

“All that most maddens and torments; all that stirs up the lees of things; all truth with malice in it; all that cracks the sinews and cakes the brain; all the subtle demonisms of life and thought; all evil, to crazy Ahab, were visibly personified, and made practically assailable in [Mariah Carey] Moby Dick.”

Great, now the whole ocean smells like fish.

I just watched a video of a diver getting his face bitten off by a shark he was trying to kiss. I could have watched it twice, but instead I came here…you win some, you lose some.

I think making the ocean work out using Mariah is just cruel. The ocean looks great just the way it is.

Close to perfect photo. To make it an A+? All you see is her head as she is sucked in by a riptide.

Call me Ickmael.

That must be a beach in LA, the water is so nasty looking. I hope she didn’t step on a used needle or a bong.

Some of the funniest comments I’ve EVER read due to this post! LOL after LOL!

Cue Hayden Panettiere

This recently published photo taken on Mar. 11, 2011 is believed to be the first photograph to capture the origin of the Japanese tsunami.

Just stay away from Japanese waters. Those people have suffered enough.

“Gojira!!”

Solo! Hay lapa no ya, Solo!

“Ariel, watch out! Ursula has come back for you!”

All the Salt in the Dead Sea couldn’t keep this heiffer afloat…

Nick Cannon needs to tie more rocks to her ankles….

I didn’t know they were making a movie out of Little Mermaid.

“I told the plumber I wanted a BIG hottub! What the fuck is this?”

I am quite optimistic…this picture was taken during shark week. Can we hope?

Doubtless alarms and sirens are going off all over Tokyo right now….

I thought those were extinct.