The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 8.13.14

August 13th, 2014 // 392 Comments

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed, a surprisingly robust collection considering the site shat its shorts for a good part of the day, resulting in a distinct lack of joy, which in turn slanted our lefty worldview right into a negative space. It’s a good thing pajama pants don’t require belts. (Back me up here, Rush.) In spite of all that scientific evidence for why God makes you super sad if you’re not cool with his son that he murdered, we prevailed and you’re still getting some good shit. Good shit like Joe Manganiello realizing that no tits are worth having to sit through a Justin Timberlake concert, Amanda Seyfried seriously considering how good that baby would look mounted on the wall in her den, and Paris Hilton earning hundreds of thousands of dollars right at the very moment that picture was taken.

So, still any takers on the whole God is real and loves you thing? Anyone? Helloooo?

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Jeff Bridges Katie Holmes Looking Confused The Giver Press Conference
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    The Dude does not abide

  2. Paris Hilton Djing Seven Nightclub
    Zohan
    Commented on this photo:

    Stupid cunt.

  3. Eddie Murphy Humping Paige Butcher At Coffee Shop Counter
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    And then later that night, they had an orgy with 7 people, all played by Eddie Murphy in costumes and makeup

  4. Andy Dick High Socks Sneakers Bree Olson Live Nude Girls Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Bree… still hanging up with junkies because of their money…

  5. Aubrey ODay Cleavage Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Since she doesn’t have a group to work with anymore, I guess she’s working on her Photoshop skills.

    C’mon, Audrey – you’ve been at it for years, you should be better at using this software…

  6. Kim Kardashian Huge Disgusting Fat Ass Tight Dress
    Short Round
    Commented on this photo:

    I read the Kardashian Whorus Attentius stores food in its butt for the Winter. By the looks of it Winter must be close.

  7. Jessica Alba Jon Gosselin Look A Like Makeup Artist Good Morning America
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    At the risk of appearing racist, I could swear there’s a Looper situation going on with Jessica Alba and Ariana Grande

  8. Harry Derbridge Fake Tan Dyed Blond Hair What If Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope this kid is doing well enough so that his parents can retire from the chocolate factory.

  9. Harry Derbridge Fake Tan Dyed Blond Hair What If Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Who designed his look, LittleBigPlanet?

  10. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Multiple Bikinis Instagram
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s nice of her to dress like an Old West showgirl to remind Hef of his boyhood years

  11. Leigh Lezark Bra Midriff Jeans Kiehls LifeRide Finale Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Very cute.

  12. Eddie Murphy Humping Paige Butcher At Coffee Shop Counter
    Commented on this photo:

    You know, I’m completely shocked that chick is still walking around, not been impregnated by Murphy.

    She must have an anal-only policy.. which he wouldn’t probably mind.

  13. Mel B Nipples Cleavage Tank Top
    Commented on this photo:

    Two women Eddie has tapped in a row.

    Will the Rule of Three apply here too?

  14. Amanda Seyfried Jessica Barth Baby Ted 2 Set
    Short Round
    Commented on this photo:

    Told you either 5 minutes of insult free conversation or the kid can sit in the Teddy Bear chair. But not both.

  15. Tori Spelling Chest Hole Of Death Super Skinny Limbs
    Commented on this photo:

    For a couple who are supposedly broke, they sure are out shopping a lot

  16. Kim Kardashian Huge Disgusting Fat Ass Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s hubby and kid?

    • Short Round

      My guess… Hubby in Paris with bunch of hookers. Kid in LA without any adult supervision. Because you don’t get a participation award in the Kardashian household if you don’t learn to fend for yourself by age 1. Sparta could learn from them.

  17. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Multiple Bikinis Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Why so serious?

  18. Paris Hilton Djing Seven Nightclub
    Odbarc
    Commented on this photo:

    This stupid cunt made 20 years worth of me working my ass off in an hour to press a fucking button.

  19. Lea Michele Legs Short Shorts Boyfriend Matthew Paetz Justin Timberlake 20/20 Experience
    guy from NY
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s got a big nose

  20. Frank Miller Sickly Bald Head Panama Hat Meet The Filmmakers Apple Store NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    “Whores? Oh yeah! There’s whores in this one, too! Let me tell you about whores! WHORES WHORES WHORES!”

  21. Bar Refaeli Bikini Instagram
    jl4
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s built like a little boy, no curves at all. ICK

  22. Jeff Bridges Katie Holmes Looking Confused The Giver Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    seconds later, she “billygoated” him.

  23. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Minidress
    Short Round
    Commented on this photo:

    Which one is her? All I see is four thin metal poles.

  24. Jennifer Lopez Butt Swimsuit Booty Album Cover Instagram
    gary_glitter
    Commented on this photo:

    photoshopped or not she looks damn hot for a woman in her forties with kids

  25. Rita Ora Legs Minidress
    Hmm
    Commented on this photo:

    Umm, why is she wearing my China pattern?

  26. Eddie Murphy Humping Paige Butcher At Coffee Shop Counter
    Hmm
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this the same photo being recycled over and over again or do they always go to the same place and he act super clingy like that?

    “I got me a white woman and I ain’t never gonna let go of her”

  27. Harry Derbridge Fake Tan Dyed Blond Hair What If Premiere
    Hmm
    Commented on this photo:

    What in the fuck type of creature is this?

  28. Jennifer Nicole Lee Buttcheeks Bikini Bottom Undone Hammock
    Short Round
    Commented on this photo:

    Have to be careful in hammocks. One big fart and you’re rocking like a boat and your bikini bottom rips off.

  29. Andy Dick High Socks Sneakers Bree Olson Live Nude Girls Premiere
    dreamcrusher
    Commented on this photo:

    Bree is slumming. Very good looking for a porn star. Natural boobs. Can cook. She can do better then that little homo nerd she is hanging with. Clearly she has gigantic self esteem issues.

  30. Jennifer Lopez Butt Swimsuit Booty Album Cover Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, Jennifer. We … we’ve seen your candid shots.

  31. Jennifer Nicole Lee Buttcheeks Bikini Bottom Undone Hammock
    Hmm
    Commented on this photo:

    And of course her fucking bikini bottom is undone. This chick? is a one trick pony.

  32. Mickey Rourke Crazy Hair And Clothes The Tonight Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet blazing balls of fuck what am I looking at?

  33. Leigh Lezark Bra Midriff Jeans Kiehls LifeRide Finale Event
    dreamcrusher
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a younger version of my ex. I hate her. Maybe she will join my ex in the club rat Hall of Fame.

  34. Jeff Bridges Katie Holmes Looking Confused The Giver Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    I love you forever, Starman.

  35. Frank Miller Sickly Bald Head Panama Hat Meet The Filmmakers Apple Store NYC
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck, I’m gonna see this shit in my nightmares tonight.

  36. Jeff Bridges Katie Holmes Looking Confused The Giver Press Conference
    b!tch-now
    Commented on this photo:

    She can “Giver” me a blowjob.

  37. Leigh Lezark Bra Midriff Jeans Kiehls LifeRide Finale Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Was everyone at this event wandering about in their bra and underwear?

  38. Corey Feldman With Prostitutes Bootsy Bellows
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, how I miss the three years in the 80s I had respect for him.

  39. Mickey Rourke Crazy Hair And Clothes The Tonight Show
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    What the hell did ‘Karma Chameleon’ mean, anyway?

  40. Neve Campbell Thick Legs Jean Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    That exciting of a photo, hm?

  41. Paris Hilton Djing Seven Nightclub
    Commented on this photo:

    More evidence of why Portugal’s economy is on the brink.

  42. Harry Derbridge Fake Tan Dyed Blond Hair What If Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    If Tilda Swinton and an android had a baby …

  43. Mickey Rourke Crazy Hair And Clothes The Tonight Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Never take a nap when your hair is still wet.

  44. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Multiple Bikinis Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    She really fucked up her nose. She has permanent gelfling face now.

  45. Rita Ora Legs Minidress
    o'chunt
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, those are nice legs.

  46. Jennifer Lopez Butt Swimsuit Booty Album Cover Instagram
    Cap'n Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    And the award for excellence in Photoshop goes to…

  47. Paris Hilton Djing Seven Nightclub
    Cap'n Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    What fucking idiot would pay her a dime to be anywhere?

    I hope they made her bring her own towel to sit on. Otherwise, they will need to burn the chair.

  48. Amanda Seyfried Jessica Barth Baby Ted 2 Set
    Cap'n Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    So bizarre looking, but she still pulls off “sexy as fuck”

  49. Lea Michele Legs Short Shorts Boyfriend Matthew Paetz Justin Timberlake 20/20 Experience
    Cap'n Obvious
    Commented on this photo:

    Whore. Shallow vapid whore.

  50. Andy Dick High Socks Sneakers Bree Olson Live Nude Girls Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’ll take ‘celebrities that can fit a bowling ball in their asshole’ for $200 please, Alex.”

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