Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed that exists in a world where an innocent virgin love that could only be penetrated by undead sparkle-penis has been shattered to pieces. Why, Bella, WHY?! I managed to stop cutting myself over this for a few minutes to bring you Tara Reid still amazingly scoring way out of her league, Madonna promoting the new line of Poise™, designed by Frederick’s of Hollywood, and the continuing puzzle of how Chloe Sevigny ever became more than a graveyard shift waitress at Waffle House (No offense, Waffle House, but you were the dirtiest restaurant I could think of.)
Now, if you’ll excuse me, my bedroom wall and I have a date with some glue and several Jennifer Lawrence posters,
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Somewhere seven tail-less horses cry
that’s my joke from like 2 days ago.
jud
somewhere a poor indian woman is walking around bald
Jul 23, 2012 at 5:41 pm / Reply /91
jeffiner
somewhere a poor horse is walking around bald
Jul 23, 2012 at 9:07 pm / Reply /51
No one gives a fuck, dumb bitch. Check your thumbs down if you don’t believe me.
wow, i didn’t know this was a thumby war.
…and Shia Le Munster.
It’s like someone asked a Women’s Co-op to design a Barbie. Consider yourself ‘educated’.
Orville Reddenbacker is stone cold pimpin’ after his chemo.
From the thumbnail, I thought it was Lindsay
I thought it was Phoebe Price! Sorry, Marg!
Soon…
Ma’am! Put…the…baton…down!
I’m surprised Usher lets him wear a mask with the eye holes cut out.
Can’t believe Peter Jackson is nailing this hot ass
Weekend at Ryan Dunn’s.
Oh shit….I’m literally laughing out loud.
Yeah that hair looks natural
Awkward Family Taxidermy.
Hahaha! Exactly.
He looks like a menapausal lesbian now. Put THAT on a WHEATIES box!
When asked how many times Tom Cruise has seen him since Suri was born, all he could do was hold up his fingers.
Oooh those are bruises on her ass. I thought my computer screen was dirty. I kept licking my finger and… ugh let’s just say I feel really weird…
Those are just marks where someone touched her with a 10-foot pole.
Taxi Driver remake?
He’s called ‘The Brain’. They travel around in a Taxi solving crimes.
Oh fuck, that’s hilarious.
I think you just combined two characters from Escape from New York. Not that I’m complaining.
He’s thinking about that time when Adrianne Curry mistook him for Peter Brady.
Depends are now available in Cranberry
Glove and long sleeves.
Apparently, she DOES read The Superficial!
Did one of the surgeons accidentally sew her mouth closed?
Yes. It’s called proactive herpes treatment. If she busts those stitches, it’s Valtrex city for her “paying subscribers”. On a happy note, you do get a pickle as a consolation prize.
What do you mean, “accidentally”?
Early Halloween makeup this year?
Uppercut uppercut jab jab orgasm uppercut to show her you love her
Is she Audrey Hollander’s mom?
Jesus fuck, did he walk in the surgeons office and ask for the pointy and tight?
He looks like a wax dummy of George Washington with a cheap toupee.
It’s like Coco ate a Crayola factory and took a shit.
That’s awesome.
Looks like they found Katherine Jackson.
Drag queens always carry huge purses to make their hands look smaller…
Tara, when you find the Yeti you bring him home! Clean him up, make him a star.
She’s not getting ready to insert that thing, is she?
“Are you sure it says quarter past irrelevant?”
“‘allo paps, make sure you get me good side . . .”
Melissa Rivers has never looked so good!
Where is the batman shooter when you need him?
He reminds me that 1976 was a Lifetime movie ago.
What an asshole.
Face like a dog in a wind tunnel.
Were they eating red Smarties a minute ago, or does Heidi think it’s cool for kids that age to wear lipstick?
I think this is the first time her daughters have been photographed wearing lipstick or makeup of any kind. The girls are just playing dress up; there’s really nothing more to it.
Really Amy. Did you think you could go out of the house without a bra and no one would take your picture? REALLY?
…and she would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for those meddling nips!
I’ll bet she lays out his clothes for him to wear.
And I’ll bet she’s teaching him how to tie his shoes!
I do that. I also grab them and say Tits. It amuses one and all.
I think I love you
heheheheeh
*Marrying DeucePickle*
Sweet !
Truth: girls love playing with their own tits. It’s kind of comforting.
You sound like fun. We should hang out.
K, just bring your own weed.
I think the guy in the hat is Christian Bale, here to console the victims of Steven Tyler’s scarf fetish.
Well who else would it be?
The cross definitely makes it so classy.
Nice pube stache
“I call it – Penis McConaughey the Third.”
Still heinous.
Five seconds ago, that plant was bursting with life and in full bloom.
The “Ringu” hairstyle really works for her…