The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 3.23.11

March 23rd, 2011 // 336 Comments

I might be taking this feature a tad too literally.

And now for that special time of the day where I pepper you in the face with celebrity photos I don’t want to write posts about. Ambition, I gots it. Here we go: Brooklyn Decker got a new haircut, but more importantly, what do her breasts think about it? They have feelings, too, you know. Reese Witherspoon is apparently going to turn into this, Joe Jonas isn’t even hiding it anymore and Kevin Federline will take one of everything, but use the Light Ranch.

Putting the shat in Shatner,

- The Superficial

Click Here to Start The Gallery

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Carrot Top
    Commented on this photo:

    Like being born a Ginger of the Orangutan variety wasn’t bad enough… Poor bastard…

  2. Carrot Top
    Dino Spumoni
    Commented on this photo:

    “But drugs, that’s a dirty business.”

  3. Kevin Federline Fat
    Commented on this photo:

    The only shock is seeing him on the customer side of the counter.

  4. William Shatner
    Ze German
    Commented on this photo:

    All jokes aside, he looks damn good for a guy who just turned 80.

  5. William Shatner
    That's Retarded
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s Retarded

  6. Reese Witherspoon
    Aquatic Fajita
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess they named her after the peanut butter cups.

  7. Kevin Federline Fat
    Commented on this photo:

    “but sir…we don’t even HAVE a fryer even if we wanted to “Brittneyfy” your sandwich”

  8. Reese Witherspoon
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh come on. These people are not celebrities & aren’t trying to be either.

  9. January Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    carefully concealling her vibrator in that matt.

  10. Joe Jonas
    Commented on this photo:

    upset he didn’t get a chance meet his Twlight crush,Rob Patterson. is now asking people to help hook him up.

  11. Clive Owen
    Commented on this photo:

    Not another Pink Panther remake…

  12. Clive Owen
    Storm
    Commented on this photo:

    “I drink your milkshake.”

  13. Carrot Top
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Gender?

    • That seems a dangerous guessing game my friend…
      I got the one about Chyna wrong so I will abstain…
      I should have trusted my instincts and never guessed female…

  14. Tom Hanks
    MrsEllis
    Commented on this photo:

    When will Hollywood stop raping novels that I liked?

  15. Carrot Top
    Commented on this photo:

    This is why Ronald McDonald should never have kids.

  16. Kevin Federline Fat
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah, I’ll have a footlong meatball. Extra cheese, mayo and meatballs.”

    “Any other toppings, sir?”

    “Yeah..three footlong meatball subs.”

  17. Kevin Federline Fat
    Agwings
    Commented on this photo:

    NOT the next Jared Fogle.

  18. Chris Brown
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    A scheming woman will deliberately set him up to lose his shit, perhaps on camera, & punch her out. Jackpot. Payoffs, money for interviews, & awesome media exposure. Come on hos, I know you’re out there!

  19. Tom Hanks
    Storm
    Commented on this photo:

    I sure hope he didn’t use method acting while preparing for the role of child molester.

  20. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Commented on this photo:

    you’re role was a Melinda Gordon of “Ghost Whisperer” NOT Slimer from Ghost busters.

  21. Clive Owen
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Goddamn it. That facial hair just ain’t right.
    I tell myself it’s for a part & will be gone soon.

  22. Clive Owen
    Commented on this photo:

    Overheard at Double Helix Laboratory Projects in New Haven, CT:

    “OK guys, we’ve spent decades perfecting the technology in the movie ‘Twins…” Now I present to you the our master creation….a perfect genetic blend of Tom Selleck, Tom Hanks, and John Travolta….VIOLA”

    “OK, who the FUCK dropped the Saddam DNA into the mix?”

  23. Kevin Federline Fat
    eab74
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess Celebrity Fit Club didn’t take…

  24. Tom Hanks
    erin
    Commented on this photo:

    I see he’s reprising his role in ‘Big.’

  25. William Shatner
    Martinkle
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know how much work he’s had done, and I’m sure it has a lot to do with the fact his eyes are about as wide open as possible, but that man looks phenomenal for 80 years old.

  26. Carrot Top
    GeorgeWBush
    Commented on this photo:

    Hmmm, Joe Jonas and Carrot Top at the same place and at the same time..a repressed closet gay Christian and a sad looking tranney…who knew.

  27. Joe Jonas
    Tip Your Veal
    Commented on this photo:

    He is wise to be practicing his hand-out pose.

  28. Reese Witherspoon
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well I’ll be DAMNED Betty. That’s the last cotton-picking time I go to a Cracker Barrel on the West Coast. I told ya time and time again IHOP is the way to go!”

  29. Reese Witherspoon
    Tip Your Veal
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s not her dad. That’s her brother.

  30. William Shatner
    KC
    Commented on this photo:

    Where will you be when your laxative kicks in?

  31. William Shatner
    noooooooooo
    Commented on this photo:

    So much for shit my dad says, looks more like the shit that slipped past the goalie.

  32. William Shatner
    Commented on this photo:

    Today’s segment should have been titled: “The Crap We Didn’t Miss”.

  33. William Shatner
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Tossed salad and scrambled eggs?!!! Not on my fuckin’ show.

  34. Brooklyn Decker Haircut
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    You’re kidding right?

  35. Joe Jonas
    Jeremy Feist
    Commented on this photo:

    “Only one finger? No no no… You best come correct. Anything less than the whole fist is an insult to Joe Jonas.”

  36. Reese Witherspoon
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Hard to believe they’re from Tennessee.

  37. Arnold Schwarzenegger
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He is saying ‘Douglas Quaid’, you know that right?

  38. Julianne Hough
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank you for not mentioning Ryan Seacrest in this post. Ah fuck!!!

  39. Tom Hanks
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Dockers? Seriously?

  40. Kevin Federline Fat
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘The biggest loser’ can mean so many things.

  41. Joe Jonas
    Commented on this photo:

    The race is on for which will grow in first… The rest of that beard of his uni-brow.

  42. Brooklyn Decker Haircut
    AC
    Commented on this photo:

    What was she arrested for?

  43. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently Ghost Whispering doesn’t really burn that many calories.

  44. Carrot Top
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d make a joke but I am too good to pick on the low-lying fruit.

  45. Clive Owen
    AC
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture makes me want to issue an APB for a lady tied to some train tracks.

  46. Carrot Top
    Commented on this photo:

    It is not a question of whether he WILL eat the booger in his hand but a question of WHEN.

  47. Jennifer Love Hewitt
    noooooooooo
    Commented on this photo:

    She walks, mouth open while emitting a sound that only unfortunate canines can hear. She is… the bitch whisperer.

  48. William Shatner
    Commented on this photo:

    It canna’ take more Botox, captain. One more shot’ll shatter the eyes for sure.

  49. Crabby Old Guy

    Kahnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn!

  50. Brooklyn Decker Haircut
    Commented on this photo:

    Hmmm…as a real person she looks pretty good.

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