The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 11.14.12

November 14th, 2012 // 545 Comments

“Honey, would you cover up? Your lady penises are practically falling out of that thing.” – Ryan Seacrest

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where it appears Gollum actually didn’t get too fucked up by the fires of Mount Doom after all, Jessica Simpson‘s weight loss selfishly robs me of a joke for this Topher Grace pic, and even Tobey Maguire needs to get super high to stand being around Tobey Maguire.

“Hey Madonna, want to help ruin everybody’s evening?” – Me, just now, because my soul is black,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

 

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Madonna Licking Microphone Madison Square Garden
    Sister Ray
    Commented on this photo:

    Another celebrity on whom the concept of aging gracefully is lost.

  2. Topher Grace Beard Popeyes Chicken Bag
    Taffy
    Commented on this photo:

    Never make another man carry your biscuits, Topher “Spicy 6 Piece” Grace!

  3. Ashton Kutcher Sitting Behind Laker Girls
    Commented on this photo:

    As close as I can tell from the uniforms… they are the “Carl’s Jr Cheerleaders”

  4. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    That gap has a uvula.

  5. Ashton Kutcher Sitting Behind Laker Girls
    Matt
    Commented on this photo:

    Does it make me a bad person if I want to beat him to death with an aluminum… You know what? Never mind. I know the answer.

  6. Topher Grace Beard Popeyes Chicken Bag
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s looking away wistfully wishing he had pursued the underage Mila Kunis when he had the chance.

  7. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll bet she made a fortune as the mold for those fake hillbilly teeth.

  8. Mischa Barton Andre Borchers Collection Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    Germany has become The Love Boat for America’s D-List celebrities.

  9. Ashton Kutcher Sitting Behind Laker Girls
    Moo Cow Hunter
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s easy to deduce who made a move on which girl.

  10. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Butt Yoga Pants
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    stick insect

  11. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she remaking that awful Jodie Foster movie “Nell”?

  12. Bill Maher
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahem….just walk away and pretend I just didn’t f**ck you in this sleazy motel here on Sunset Blvd….

  13. Chloe Simms Cleavage Book Launch Party
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    does she know breasts do not look like that???

  14. Bill Maher
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    He bought her beer and she gives him head. It’s an arrangement that works for everyone.

  15. Bryan Cranston TIME Person Of The Year Panel
    Commented on this photo:

    As long as he doesn’t pick the EU, then I’m cool with it.

  16. Chloe Simms Cleavage Book Launch Party
    Sister Ray
    Commented on this photo:

    Having bolt-ons is bad enough. Having extreme bolt-ons and displaying them with pride is beyond the pale.

  17. Jaden Smith Headphones
    Commented on this photo:

    Patiently waiting on the book he’s writing about how difficult his life was growing up…

  18. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    At dawn, just over a month from now, the sun’s going to shine all the way down to her tonsils

  19. Maria Shriver
    Commented on this photo:

    Will you look at that… the glare on her head looks like a blinding pine tree lit by Clark Griswald. It’s a Christmas Miracle.

  20. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Yoga pants… approved.

  21. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    Snoop Lion
    Commented on this photo:

    Gap teeth in ya mouth so my dick’s gots to fit. With my nuts on ya tonsils…

  22. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, now we know that Alfalfa had at least one kid.

  23. Jaden Smith Headphones
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d like to whip his neck back and forth.

  24. Madonna Licking Microphone Madison Square Garden
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that microphone a Vega or a Sennheiser?

    Sorry, I was just trying to find something that actually interested me about this picture.

  25. Topher Grace Beard Popeyes Chicken Bag
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Grace before dinner

  26. Chloe Simms Cleavage Book Launch Party
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    All of that and a mustache too!

  27. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Are her pants so tight that, much like John Hamm’s penis, her delicious cooter has nowhere to go but sideways?

  28. Tobey Maguire Tired The Ninth Annual CFDA Vogue Fashion Fund Awards
    Dr. Mantis Toboggan
    Commented on this photo:

    I got your test results! You’re positive! You’ve got the HIV! Yes, AIDS, big time! You’ve got the AIDS, big time!

  29. Sylvester Stallone Sunglasses Bullet To The Head Photocall
    Taffy
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that’s an ass my mom could read for days!

  30. Christina Ricci Midriff Miniskirt The Ninth Annual CFDA Vogue Fashion Fund Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She has a five-head…

  31. Topher Grace Beard Popeyes Chicken Bag
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    You can be a king or a sweeper but make no mistake, everyone loves that chicken from Popeye’s.

  32. Christina Ricci Midriff Miniskirt The Ninth Annual CFDA Vogue Fashion Fund Awards
    omgwtf
    Commented on this photo:

    Wednesday Addams

  33. Chloe Simms Cleavage Book Launch Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Who is this horrible implant job bucktooth-tard?

  34. Camille Grammer Cleavage TV Guide Hot List Party
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    No wonder she has irritable bowel syndrome.

  35. Vanessa Paradis Gap In Teeth Mouth Open Fading Gigolo Set
    Max
    Commented on this photo:

    Happy Halloween!

  36. Imogen Thomas Cleavage Pregnant Chloe Simms Book Launch
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    does everyone at that party require giant breasts?

  37. Madonna Licking Microphone Madison Square Garden
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    The road crew secretly replaced Madonna’s usual microphone with one dipped in liquid nitrogen. Let’s watch.

  38. Kristian Schuler Grabbing Penelope Cruz Breast Kiss Superstition Goodbye Campari Calendar Event
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now to complete the greeting, you have to massage my testicles with your right hand.”

  39. Cheyenne Tozzi Bikini Runway
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    would look better if her boobs were not crushed

  40. Maria Shriver
    Max
    Commented on this photo:

    Check your spelling, it’s Maria Shrivel.

  41. Christina Ricci Midriff Miniskirt The Ninth Annual CFDA Vogue Fashion Fund Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Six-head?

  42. Cheyenne Tozzi Bikini Runway
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    something…….not quite right there

  43. Chloe Simms Cleavage Book Launch Party
    Max
    Commented on this photo:

    Those artists and Madame Tussaud’s are amazing!

  44. Bryan Cranston TIME Person Of The Year Panel
    Moo Cow Hunter
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t believe that little shit won two Emmys. I was an actor before he was born. I’m the man in this. Me, Heisenb… I mean Bryan Cranston.

  45. Cheyenne Tozzi Bikini Runway
    Commented on this photo:

    Fucking tats again… Jesus…

  46. Rosie Huntington-Whiteley Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Regardless of what you may think about her acting, she’s obviously pretty good at auto detailing.

  47. Camille Grammer Cleavage TV Guide Hot List Party
    Sheppy
    Commented on this photo:

    Cracks are starting to appear…

  48. Madonna Licking Microphone Madison Square Garden
    Jade
    Commented on this photo:

    Icky :(

    Don’t get me wrong. When I’m her age I’d like to be fit, active, and youthful. But I don’t want to be a nasty whore, and I’d like my children and grand children to not be embarrassed of me.

  49. Madonna Licking Microphone Madison Square Garden
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’ve fallen and I can’t get up!”

  50. Bill Maher
    Commented on this photo:

    Man, he got old quick.

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