The Crap We Missed – Wednesday 10.2.13

October 2nd, 2013 // 426 Comments

Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed where normally I’d take an offhand shot at a political hot topic, like the current government shutdown, but the bleak reality of our completely broken system isn’t geting me in the mood for snark. Plus, shoving ideology into a feature that on a daily basis contains pictures like this one where the only purpose is to bait a blow job joke isn’t appropriate or effective. So allow me to tee off the first blow job joke with Farrah Abraham, who’s probably requesting a procedure to have her throat widened. To fit more dicks. There’s also John Lithgow, who thinks your messenger bag is for fags, Joe Gorga‘s nightmare, David Beckham dangling above John Travolta‘s cage in an object lesson about the dangers of rejecting Scientology, and Kate Upton without makeup.

And cue guys trying to pretend a few zits would ever make them ignore the mind erasing magic of giant breasts. Try to tell me that face on anything under a C cup wouldn’t be ringing up gas,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Ja Rule Huge Muscles
    Commented on this photo:

    Prison, it does a body good.
    Except your butthole…

  2. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Tight Leather Dress Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Such a natural beauty.

  3. Ja Rule Huge Muscles
    Commented on this photo:

    Black dudes can get yoked up in a weekend.

  4. Rachel Weisz Daniel Craig Betrayal Broadway
    Juch
    Commented on this photo:

    Despite using his every connection and resource, Travolta was unable to get the role played by Weisz.

  5. Katie Holmes Legs Minidress Gravity Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, she looks good here.

  6. Ja Rule Huge Muscles
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll take a wild guess he’s not in fact on his way to a Mensa meeting.

  7. Geena Davis TSA Screening LAX
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    And thats what sleeping with the BrundelFly will get you.

  8. John Lithgow Carrying Purse
    Commented on this photo:

    I like him enough that I am just going to ignore the handbag this time.

  9. Hugh Jackman Loafers No Socks
    Commented on this photo:

    The dude has a bad case of chickenlegs…is that genetic, or does he only work out for movies shot waist up?

  10. Ciara Cleavage See Through Dress Mademoiselle C Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Mademoiselle C? Looks about right.

  11. Geena Davis TSA Screening LAX
    Bob Hopeless
    Commented on this photo:

    So, the kid’s in the bag, right?

  12. Jesse Ventura Balding Wispy Gray Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re all a bunch of slack jawed faggots! This stuff will turn you into a sexual tyrannosaurus. Just like me…”

  13. Ja Rule Huge Muscles
    Commented on this photo:

    When you listen to Ja Rule, the mob rules.

  14. Ian McKellen Orlando Bloom Natalie Morales Al Roker The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “The fuck you say?” both the old and the young version.

  15. Denise Richards Ultra Skinny Arms
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t get to use the word “sinewy” often, but this is definitely one of those times.

  16. Jesse Ventura Balding Wispy Gray Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    wow, he looks like shit.

  17. January Jones Bitchface Bra See Through Blouse
    Juch
    Commented on this photo:

    Wonder if the baby is in the red bag or the white bag.

  18. Sarah Michelle Gellar Legs Short Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit Buffy, you are supposed to wear a skirt and no panties when you do that.

  19. January Jones Bitchface Bra See Through Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Day 451: I still haven’t been able to sell what’s-his-name on the black market… Apparently, even the Chinese want to know the identity of his father…

  20. Denise Richards Ultra Skinny Arms
    Commented on this photo:

    GEEaaaaghhhh!

    that’s the closest I can come to spelling the sound I just had to explain to my coworkers.

  21. Kylie Jenner Legs Daisy Dukes
    Commented on this photo:

    Celly celly in her hand and on her legs.

  22. Janice Dickinson Sinewy Arms Paul & Joe Fashion Show Paris Fashion Week
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently, I get to use the word “sinewy” twice today…

  23. Janice Dickinson Sinewy Arms Paul & Joe Fashion Show Paris Fashion Week
    Qmak
    Commented on this photo:

    The elderly fembot’s chest is glowing red, which means USR is uploading information to her.

  24. Ja Rule Huge Muscles
    Commented on this photo:

    Jacked Rule.

  25. John Lithgow Carrying Purse
    Commented on this photo:

    The return of Roberta Muldoon.

  26. Farrah Abraham Cleavage No Pants Girls And Corpses Magazine Spread
    Commented on this photo:

    Attagirl… reach for those stars.

  27. Kendall Jenner Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, this chick is smoking. The fat and ugly ones must want to kill her so bad.

  28. John Lithgow Carrying Purse
    Minky Wail
    Commented on this photo:

    Your move, Dame Edna.

  29. Farrah Abraham Cleavage No Pants Girls And Corpses Magazine Spread
    Commented on this photo:

    Congratulations Farrah…you’ve risen all the way up to Courtney Stodden’s level.

  30. Malin Akerman Butt Tight Pants Suit CBGB Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Why on God’s earth did she get that ugly, shit tattoo? Ruined a beautiful canvas.

  31. Kelly Brook Butt Swimsuit Instagram
    beaver eater
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to floss my teeth with that bikini

  32. Geena Davis TSA Screening LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    Hope she has an EpiPen in one of those bags, that bag of mixed nuts might have had peanuts.

  33. Geena Davis TSA Screening LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    When did Pelican start making luggage?

  34. Kate Upton Acne No Makeup Workout Clothes
    diego
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope that’s Chicken Pox

  35. Rachel Weisz Daniel Craig Betrayal Broadway
    Commented on this photo:

    You just know Hugh Jackman is right about to walk in on this scene and he is not even in this play.

  36. Barbara Walters No Make Up Haggard Face
    Qmak
    Commented on this photo:

    Dammit…somebody say Betelgeuse three times again.

  37. January Jones Bitchface Bra See Through Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    By the time the coffee shop realized January Jones had misinterpreted the “Free Hot Chocolate for Your Kids!” promotion, she had already dropped her son off and disappeared over the horizon with her cup.

  38. Denise Richards Ultra Skinny Arms
    Commented on this photo:

    So she is dating A-Rod now?

  39. Barbara Walters No Make Up Haggard Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, just wow. She looks like she died about 10 years ago.

  40. Barbara Walters No Make Up Haggard Face
    Commented on this photo:

    BWAINS!!! BWAAAAINNSSS!!

  41. January Jones Bitchface Bra See Through Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    See she got rid of that pesky kid.

  42. Barbara Walters No Make Up Haggard Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Good Lord, that scared the shit out of me.

  43. January Jones Bitchface Bra See Through Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Has she considered pants that fit?

  44. Claire Sinclair Cleavage Legs Minidres Vegas Welcome Sign
    Commented on this photo:

    For some reason, I really like this girl. Well, besides the obvious ones.

  45. Kelly Brook Butt Swimsuit Instagram
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Dear Instagram, all your sins are forgiven. I don’t know how I could have been so wrong.

  46. Janice Dickinson Sinewy Arms Paul & Joe Fashion Show Paris Fashion Week
    I'mCool
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like she thinks her shit don’t stink. But I can smell it through my monitor and it stinks to high heaven. Oh, wait … that’s me. Nevermind.

  47. Kelly Brook Butt Swimsuit Instagram
    Unkempt Cheeseburger
    Commented on this photo:

    This pic is mad old, I’ve seen this thing thrown around for a while now…

  48. January Jones Bitchface Bra See Through Blouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor kid is trapped in an endless cycle of “Day Care/Night, Who Cares?”

  49. Estelle Harris Bandage On Nose CBGB Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Told you not to peep Chris Brown’s phone…

  50. Farrah Abraham Chim Implant Removal Consultation
    Icehawg
    Commented on this photo:

    “Jeez….I only see that kind of throat dent in 60 year old prostitutes with long histories of ridiculously hardcore anal sex. We might need to run some tests to determine what caus….”

    “uh…that’s okay Doc. Nevermind.”

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