If you noticed the dude’s face and went, “Who’s that guy,” congratulations on coming out.
Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed that none of you are reading because you’re probably out stocking up on high-capacity magazines for when President Nick Brody Obama orders the military to kick in your trailer door and force you to witness a homosexual wedding. It’s all part of his plan, if your eyes are truly open. Anyway, aside from today’s not-at-all-assault on the 2nd Amendment, it was also ‘Show Your Bra Day’ on Twitter, whether you do it at your job, or you have no discernible job or even if you’re Shakira and why dear God, why do you have to ruin everything, you bastard?! We’ve also got Kobe Bryant, who’s going to be shopping for another 48 carat diamond real soon, Kim Kardashian, whose calf-birthing hips are filling out nicely, Channing Tatum either hamm-boning or that’s the sexiest shadow I’ve ever seen, and Chris Brown looking his straight-up gansterest.
I said no sprinkles, BITCH!
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, NGRE/AKM-GSI, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
*shoes
When I was a kid I thought she was just the epitome of hot. Sigh, now all I see is my Aunt Agnes.
Cervixes don’t lie
He stole Jaden Smith’s eyebrows.
I’m looking at that sexy rear end and it looks like a Mercedes C-class.
That’s the most “don’t you wish you were me (yup, I’m tapping that)” face I’ve ever seen.
Wait a second…isn’t she married to an 86 year old Texan billionaire?
Not yet. But give it time, sagging body parts, turning 30, and desperation…
Nah, I want Kate Upton to stay a little hotter. Unless fitness isn’t one of her hobbies. :Z
First I thought Katherine Heigl got skinny again?!
Tell me, schatze, is it twue what they say about the way you people are… gifted?
So, that would make that guy about 5’2″.
Yeah, there is just no unseeing those thighs.
No clue who she is but the Hollywood Magicians probably sell her as hot.
Nothing says Fashion Show like Michael Madsen
I don’t get why men dress as women, I just don’t get it…
Oh, isn’t that the cutest thing! I just want to roll around and play with it all day and all night!
The dog is nice, too.
Sebastian: “Don’t look down, don’t look down, don’t look down, don’t look down, don’t look down.”
Hello 911? There’s a homeless person who keeps trying to pump my gas.
Unfortunately when the other Terminator came to the past and said “Come with me, if you don’t want to be a total douchy loser.” Edward declined.
Are none of these celebrities smart enough to hold their cellphone hand out of the mirror view?
The second Brown declares bankruptcy, those bodyguards are going to kick the ever living shit out of him. All I ask is for is iPhone footage.
Chelsea Handler: “Meet me in Colorado!”
I didn’t have sex with 50 cent, that’s how much I charge…
When the dude has the babe on his arm and is still eyeballing the cameraman during the shoot, you should probably consider casting any of the other guys in the background.
Cameron Diaz quickly regrets accepting the role in “Bride of Frankenstein.”
Edward, the gutter called and asked that you move out by the end of the month.
So wait, she’s already 8 months pregnant…?
Her ass has been, for over two years now.
Heffalump.
Nah, easily seven-eighths of a lump.
In moments like this I realize how depressing city architecture really is. Why can’t we have nice buildings to frame her ass against?!
…and you’re sure they’re not at an airport luggage carousel?
Looking to score some good new luggage.
Still worth a fap or two!
This is why God created yoga pants.
why did he create them in size XXL, and allow them to be sold to fatass broads?
I HATE these celebrity Xmas cards..
Why can’t you push your girlfriend ?
Maybe it was out of a 15th story window…
I don’t know who he is. Is he dying? Is this like some sort pervy make-a-wish gig?
Nothing but beef.
Mooooooooooooooooo.
“Crunch….Chomp, Chomp, Chomp….Burp”
Make a Wish Foundation strikes again.
That’s mostly the child’s booty.
It’s really sad that even with a pregnancy her boobs stayed small.
Wait till after she gives birth, milk = huge boobs
Of course it is perfectly normal for a person to record songs in their underwear. Of course.
Why didn’t they wait til the baby is out, just to be sure?
Yo Babe! I have this Ninja Turtle Fantasy!
Bluebell Madonna.. This is your Mummy speaking. Are the nanies treating you well? Have a nice life!
GROSS PIGGGGGGGGGG
This movie is gonna be so gay.. But she is BEAUTIFUL!!!
Still hot.
20 years of training and he still doesn’t know that dogs eat shit.
Dog sez: “I usually have to chew through the pants to get to the peanut butter.”
I’m sure Jimmy Fallon just started laughing for no good reason in mid-sentence.
“Yo Kobe, Fifty Cent is hung like a Chinaman”.
I literally just burped when seeing this.