If you noticed the dude’s face and went, “Who’s that guy,” congratulations on coming out.
Welcome to Wednesday’s The Crap We Missed that none of you are reading because you’re probably out stocking up on high-capacity magazines for when President Nick Brody Obama orders the military to kick in your trailer door and force you to witness a homosexual wedding. It’s all part of his plan, if your eyes are truly open. Anyway, aside from today’s not-at-all-assault on the 2nd Amendment, it was also ‘Show Your Bra Day’ on Twitter, whether you do it at your job, or you have no discernible job or even if you’re Shakira and why dear God, why do you have to ruin everything, you bastard?! We’ve also got Kobe Bryant, who’s going to be shopping for another 48 carat diamond real soon, Kim Kardashian, whose calf-birthing hips are filling out nicely, Channing Tatum either hamm-boning or that’s the sexiest shadow I’ve ever seen, and Chris Brown looking his straight-up gansterest.
I said no sprinkles, BITCH!
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, NGRE/AKM-GSI, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
You ever listen to K-Billy’s “Super Sounds of the Seventies” weekend? It’s my personal favorite.
“Ahehheh, yeah….I did her…ahuhhuh”
The amazing backwards-walking Ali Larter
He pushed his girlfriend out of the line of fire from a Terminator. Duh! Don’t you guys understand, everything he does in life, is to prevent a future robot Armageddon! Set him free!!
More like Ali Harder amirite?
Kim,
You are blowing up faster than a family of red necks at Olde Country Buffet! You look miserable about it too, you fucking vain pig.
P.S. I pray to god your read this.
Get a good look, alcoholics. This is what sobriety looks like.
I’d pee in her butt
On this episode of The Walking Dead…
He was doing so well staying off public radar. Now he’s back on the grid. Skynet will find him.
who dick you suckin?
“Kobe, I handled that beast Fifty Cent, so i can take it ALL. Of course, I have gonorrhea and AIDS (look at my face), but that’s how I roll. Fuck, your wife is watching me.”
“Oh my gawd! This is way better than that time Terry Farrell kissed a girl on ‘Deep Space Nine!’”
Always surrounded by the guys he runs and hides behind when attacked by a man.
I don’t want to fight them. Can I just see the duck sized whores?
yo, yo, sparky, I hear ya DAWG.
Ahz got Pep Boys to put da labels back on my plastic chrome wheel covers yo, that shit is TIGHT.
Creepy. My grandmother was buried in that same dress.
I hear she was delicious.
She has always been super-hot! She needs bigger parts in movies and TV, so I can rub my 3 inch, on my 42 inch.
‘Hey……I filed for bankruptcy last year, this is the best I could do on short notice!”
MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Did you know that you should write down your favorite food in your clothes, just in case you get so high you forget to eat?
The More You Know . . .
LOL!
Definitely deserves a golf clap
too easy
He thinks his girlfriend doesn’t know he’s 50.
luckiest pooch!
Wow, Lena Dunham really does have a boyfriend.
So you get my soul and I get to have sex with you? Where do I sign?
great keister!
Nope, that dude isn’t making increasingly desperate calls to borrow money for meth.
A false bottomed tractor trailer would have been a more inconspicuous way of smuggling an illegal into the US.
One of these people is having a heart attack. The other is having a stroke. Try to guess which is which.
Invisible reacharound.
“Gawd, dad! Stop acting like I’m your ‘escort!’”
No, seriously, my face peels right off. Check it out…
This is the problem. If you cocktease don’t be suprised by the reaction. She has no problem posting half naked pics of herself but I bet if you looked at her longer than 3 seconds on the street she’d have a bitchfest. Either follow through or don’t do it. I hate cunts like her. – I don’t know why I just said all this.
From the thumbnail, I thought this was Jessica Simpson 10 minutes after conception.
“I WAS MARRIED FOR TWO FUCKING YEARS!”
Akward! That guy does not go for the bitches.
Did Lindsay Lohan and Snookie have a baby? If so, kill it.
DUHHH…tongues don’t work!
I can almost hear the Fran Drescher laugh.
Can I get a “What, what” for menopause?!!?
You dry hump a gas pump that hard and you risk it igniting.
It’s a shame a fake cheeta had to die to make that.
Hey, roadkill has to go somewhere.
What do Cesar Millan and Chris Brown have in common? They both teach bitches to obey.
Anyone else constantly searching for huge dick-prints after the Jon Hamm precedent was set?
This is the problem with fans. You show up to sign a few books, next thing you know they are all over you wagging their tail kissing you.
I’m serious, I was so high I thought I was Lord Helmet playing with my dolls again.
ASS TO ASS!!!
Most emotionally scarring movie ever. Still can’t watch it twice :-O
One of my favourite movies ever.
That will be written on her tombstone.
Hips don’t lie, but apparently her diaphragm does.
why is there blood on his shows and hipster sweats?