The Crap We Missed: Valentine’s Day Edition

February 14th, 2013 // 498 Comments

Welcome to a very special Valentine’s Day Edition of The Crap We Missed that’s totally going to score you the beej that those gas station roses weren’t going to. Just Kidding! Relationships are awful prisons of doubt and remorse which no amount of candy or $8 cards with grade school poetry could ever fix. That said, this ridiculous holiday gives Fish and me a reason to finally use these ball gags to skip out early, so I’m all for it. I’m also all for a solid 4th day in a row of SI swimsuit models pimping their obsolete magazine, so enjoy Kate Upton, Katherine Webb, Nina Agdal, Natasha Barnhard, Hana Davis…trust me it keeps going.

Your daddies love you guys,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Ed Westwick Blue Steel Face Tommy Hilfiger West Coast Flagship Grand Opening Event
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    Team Edward much?

  2. Heather McDonald Book Signing Humped By Joe Francis
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    That old bag actually has a great bod!

  3. Cintia Dicker Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
    o'chunt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dicker? But I hardly know her!”

  4. Jodie Marsh Bikini Twitter
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Nurse? I need help. I caught a nasty STD and I think . . . Y’know what? I’ll wait for the doctor. You look like you’ll just create more problems.”

  5. Hanna Davis Cleavage Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Guess who’s in these pictures . . . Guess . . . You’re not guessing!”

  6. Hayden Panettiere Henry Winkler Twitter
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Fonz has still got the better hairline.

  7. Jerry Lewis
    contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Jerry Lewis peeks out of his casket and screams “SCHMELMAN!!!!!”

  8. Jerry Lewis
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Could be his next to last ride in a long black Caddy!

  9. Lydia Bright Red Nose Groping Mickey Doll Crotch Disney Store
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Why do I have to show you on a Mickey Mouse doll where he touched me?”

  10. Jodie Marsh Bikini Twitter
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder if she keeps Valtrex in those first aid kits.

  11. Liberty Ross Cleavage Legs Minidress Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Let’s see that bitch from Twilight smile.”

  12. Bar Refaeli Cleavage 63rd Sanremo Song Festival
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Beat the dick like a motherfucking drummer chick.

  13. Pauly Shore Crouching Shirtless Small Bathing Suit
    USDA Prime McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure I can see his biodome.

  14. Paris Hilton Tight See Through Dress Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    Happy VD!

  15. Madonna Flabby Old Buttcheeks Instagram
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    The latest BF needs to bang her harder so we won’t be subjected to this sort of thing.

  16. Bar Refaeli Cleavage 63rd Sanremo Song Festival
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    She really raises the BAR when it comes to- I hate myself.

  17. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Dres Oz The Great And Powerful Premiere
    karlito
    Commented on this photo:

    she loves showing her ass.

  18. the whole enchilada

    Gives Fish and me a reason. Not, “Fish and I a reason” learn some basic grammar before you write.

  19. Pink Abs Crazy Hair
    karlito
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s built like a African pygmy. there s nothing sexy when a woman bulks up and has muscles pointing to her snatch.

  20. Hanna Davis Cleavage Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
    Beer Baron
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t tell if her lips are normally that “dick-sucky” or she has botox.

  21. Vanessa Hudgens Handstand Booty Shorts Twitter
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    This, we need to see more of this. This needs to become a “thing”. Hot girls doing handstands against fences. Someone please turn this into a meme.

  22. Ed Westwick Blue Steel Face Tommy Hilfiger West Coast Flagship Grand Opening Event
    tom
    Commented on this photo:

    Fucking hipster.

  23. Wilmer Valderrama Joe Jonas Nick Jonas Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    Testicle Toes
    Commented on this photo:

    3 Douche Bags. I remember watching punks. THe homo in the middle was on the show and screamed like a baby.

  24. Wilmer Valderrama Joe Jonas Nick Jonas Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    Testicle Toes
    Commented on this photo:

    EDIT: Punk’d

  25. Kate Upton Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Clothes just get in the way and make her look frumpy.

  26. Paris Hilton Tight See Through Dress Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    karlito
    Commented on this photo:

    i thought it was a drag queen dressing as a drag queen trying to look like Paris Hiton.

  27. Willow Smith Jada Pinkett Smith Masked Security Guard
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Bane died in the end……

  28. Jude Law Tongue Out Side Effects Premiere Berlin International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Hair style by the Lollipop Guild.

  29. DMX Mugshot
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    If he ever does get a license again, they should use that mugshot for the picture. This way next time he gets busted they can just use the one they have one file for the next mugshot. It would save a lot of time.

  30. Wilmer Valderrama Joe Jonas Nick Jonas Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Douchefecta.

  31. Jerry Lewis
    Commented on this photo:

    I think he’s #1 on the Dead Pool.

  32. Heather McDonald Book Signing Humped By Joe Francis
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Promoting her new book “MILFS Gone Hog Wild”

  33. Vanessa Hudgens Handstand Booty Shorts Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    There really is a pot of gold at the und of the rainbow.

  34. Bruce Campbell Middle Finger Oz The Great And Powerful Premiere
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is this squarehead so angry?

  35. Michael Douglas Fashion Week
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought it was Ellen doing her Karl Lagerfeld impression

  36. Bruce Campbell Middle Finger Oz The Great And Powerful Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Who’s laughing now!!

  37. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Dres Oz The Great And Powerful Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    I just hate her…okay, I’ll be nicer…I strongly dislike her.

  38. Heather McDonald Book Signing Humped By Joe Francis
    Commented on this photo:

    So let’s see….. joe francis would ply young women up with liquor and then get the intoxicated you women to have their naked bodies filmed. And in process joe francis became a gazillionaire.

    joe francis sound like a great upstanding fellow no?

  39. DMX Mugshot
    Commented on this photo:

    Where’s my bitches!!?

  40. Nina Agdal Celavage SI Swimsuit Issue
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes, please…preferably bent over the arm of my sofa.

  41. Michael Douglas Fashion Week
    Commented on this photo:

    Viagra, bitches!

  42. Michael Douglas Fashion Week
    Commented on this photo:

    Size of my penis? This.

  43. Pink Abs Crazy Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    And in the middle, Willow Smith in 10 years.

  44. Rose McGowan Butt Tight Dress Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    Commented on this photo:

    still would…my penis is nostalgic that way.

  45. Pink Abs Crazy Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    Whats the chances she’s str8?

  46. Paris Hilton Tight See Through Dress Topshop Topman LA Opening Party
    Commented on this photo:

    “I got a new one, Bobby. Winky-Dinky Ho Cake…ho’s gotta eat too”.

  47. Heather McDonald Book Signing Humped By Joe Francis
    Commented on this photo:

    Surprise Anal!

    (he learned it in prison – from the other end)

  48. Heather McDonald Book Signing Humped By Joe Francis
    Commented on this photo:

    “If you’re drowning in pussy, you can always swim to the butt.”

  49. Hayden Panettiere Henry Winkler Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    “I fucked Marion Ross on the closed set of Happy Days, and this shit happened.”

  50. Kate Upton Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue
    Commented on this photo:

    From the top:
    Outline of great tits – Check.
    Outline of nice stomach – Check.
    Outline of penis – Che….WTF?

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