Welcome to a very special Valentine’s Day Edition of The Crap We Missed that’s totally going to score you the beej that those gas station roses weren’t going to. Just Kidding! Relationships are awful prisons of doubt and remorse which no amount of candy or $8 cards with grade school poetry could ever fix. That said, this ridiculous holiday gives Fish and me a reason to finally use these ball gags to skip out early, so I’m all for it. I’m also all for a solid 4th day in a row of SI swimsuit models pimping their obsolete magazine, so enjoy Kate Upton, Katherine Webb, Nina Agdal, Natasha Barnhard, Hana Davis…trust me it keeps going.
Your daddies love you guys,
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Closeup of the back seat of Anne Hathaway’s car.
I had no idea Hannibal Lecter had gotten into the bodyguard business. He looks good.
If even Hannibal Lecter had to serve his Community Service what does that say about Chris Brown…
She’s waaaayyy out of his date range….
Also, a woman.
Yes!!
This is what happens when you bang everything in sight: You start playing for the other team…
“When I’ve made you look like the spoiled douche you are, then you have my permission to die…”
“I was wondering what would break first. Your spirit, or your handbag.”
That’s how you sprain a testicle…
What’s the Maximum Douche-pency of that room? I think they’re over the limit.
That guy in the back with that wry smile wants to take them all from behind, in the behind.
Look at him, it’s true!
The guy in the back has already had those Jonas bros….twice. Then he got a little sore and handed them off to Wilmer.
Lesbian.
Which one?
Yes, I know they stink, but that’s not nice!
Bane wearing the latest in menswear from the Fashion League of Shadows.
Miley Cyrus, stage 3 gender transformation…
And Instagram just filed for bankruptcy.
How cute, she’s growing a gunt just like her BFF Kim…
Please, someone take the camera away from grandma.
Flapjacks in the rear, not a good look, still her best side tho.
This looks like a girl on the cross country team I used to fuck in college.
When she slept, she’d oink like a pig and paw the air with her wrists together, in a digging motion. But man, the sex was great.
Wait, you screwed Jessica Simpson??
Oh, my bad, you said cross-country team and college.
Your life sounds like it was way cooler than mine.
Notice how most of his exploits were in college. I don’t think his life’s been that cool for 10 or 15 years now.
Still, what’s that old saying? “It is better to have plowed and fled, than to have never spelunked in the bunk at all?”
Tom,
You are correct about that one!
Which college, barber or clown?
(Yes, I know that is an ancient joke, but it still makes me lol).
This Harlem shake bullshit has got to stop.
Happy V-D Day my greek goddess.
see u soon, kisses
I put a coin in, where does it dispense the gumball?
“Alright you Primitive Screwheads, listen up! You see this? This… is my fuck you stick!”
I have nothing to add. fucking well said
I like those tom toms.
It’s black history month Fish.
Jus sayin!
Well this guy’s black history keeps repeating itself.
Couldnt have said it better.
He’s been popped 6 FUCKING TIMES for driving without a license.
Driving without a license is the gangsta shit.
*barks like dog*
“WHeRe’S mA BaiL BonDSmen, ARF ARF!”
Luv it Deuce!
LOL!
Skeletor’s daughter, but who’s the mom?
Kudos to Mr. Westwich for accomplishing the difficult task of making both members of ‘Jedward’ look masculine by comparison.
It’s Lady’s Night somewhere…..else.
“Help! I’ve fallen and I’ve got big breasts!”
I guess our punishment must be more severe.
joker….
Joker….
JOKER!
Ha! No one under 35 will know what this is in reference to, though.
That’s what those shoes are made for…to be up in the air.
I almost didn’t recognize them not behind her ears.
Really???
She put her hand down there, what an effin tease.
“M-I-C, K-E-Y, H-A-N-D-J-O-B”
I hate you with all that I am.
MMMM, banana tits!
Even more banana tits.
Should have eaten an apple today.
He’s got the motivational soundtrack and everything… Pauly takes his Kegels seriously.
I suddenly have the taste for a nice Chianti.
No man is coming forward to claim this one.
Film from the first spycam, 1953.
also the date Madonna could last pass for sexy
Why wasn’t this a nude beach?!?!
The old coot looks good.
She aint that old Doc.
He is such a douche.
I hope she turned around and slapped him with an entrenching tool.
Fish says he’s for gun control and then posts pictures like this?
This brain-trust really thinks he’s “The Fonz.”
Trying to make those body proportions look normal – it’s not working.
“Eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee- OH, GOD! MY HEART!”
I am Bel Aire’s reckonning!
I didn’t know The Fonz was only 4’2″.
5′ 2″ bruhhh.