The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 9.4.12

September 4th, 2012 // 839 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which is bursting at the seams thanks to the long weekend, coupled with the bottomless reserve of celebs looking awful and/or amazing and my shameless disposition to exploit them on your behalf. That said, we’ve got Jeremy Renner just handing these to me on a platter now, ditto goes for Tobey Maguire, Willem Dafoe looking like he just sipped on a tasty Sarsaparilla, Gary Busey figuring out how to stop his kid’s constant shrieks of terror, Janice Dickinson trying to murder your eyes, Michael Fassbender stepping on it again, and finally, The Zac Efron Pussy Tour of Italy that literally stops only seconds before boarding the plane home.

Yes, kid, Prince Harry knows you want a Red Rider BB gun, now shut up so he can hear your sister,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Coco Cleavage Tight Minidress
    Oz Matters
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m not saying she has a wide cleavage, I’m just saying it would be like throwing a hot dog down an airport runway.

  2. Vanessa Williams US Open
    TheTrooffairy
    Commented on this photo:

    Using proactive = Face looking like Kim K’s cheese thighs…. BUYING IT!!!

  3. Jenna Jameson Lopsided Cleavage Crossed Eyes
    Commented on this photo:

    More like crazy tits III. One is defining the laws of gravity and one is obeying.

  4. Jenna Jameson Lopsided Cleavage Crossed Eyes
    mfb
    Commented on this photo:

    her boobs are off kilter WTF???

  5. Michael Fassbender Laughing  69th Venice International Film Festival
    Orevet
    Commented on this photo:

    Fish are friends, not food.

  6. Jenna Jameson Lopsided Cleavage Crossed Eyes
    Mig
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait, what happened to Lucy Lui and why is she wearing a blond wig?

  7. Lady Gaga Anchor Tattoo Twitter
    Sparky
    Commented on this photo:

    so unique

  8. Nick Nolte Red Face Bumper Cars Malibu Chili Cook Off
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    They ought to have a sign that reads: “If your blood pressure is above 300/180, you are not permitted to ride the bumper cars, Mr. Nolte.”

  9. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face US Open
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    Meanwhile at the Nickleback concert…

  10. Gary Busey Shirt Over Head Sunglasses Steffanie Sampson
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s right America! Obama would have us live in some kind of crazy pseudo reverse Muslim nation!!! Pretty soon guys will be forced to wear pants… you just mark my words!

  11. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face US Open
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    FUN FACT: Aussie actress Nicole Kidman loathes tennis!

  12. Vanessa Williams US Open
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    God Emperor of Dune Leto II of House Atreides

  13. Katie Holmes Butt Tight Jeans Suri Cruise
    TheTrooffairy
    Commented on this photo:

    “And then I held daddy in my arms like this…”

  14. Nick Nolte Red Face Bumper Cars Malibu Chili Cook Off
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like he just ate Brian Dennehy and it doesn’t agree with him.

  15. Tobey Maguire Bermuda Shorts White T Shirt Daughter Ruby
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Fancy men use only “premium” ice.

  16. Janice Dickinson Upskirt Panty Flash
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    And she was [hopefully] never photographed again.

  17. Kim Kardashian Kanye West Ridiculous Clothes
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Two A-holes walk into a wall.

  18. Jenna Jameson Lopsided Cleavage Crossed Eyes
    Commented on this photo:

    Through the amazing phenomenom of evolution, in only a few short years, the “Jennajameson” has developed small, squinty eyes, in order to best avoid the constant barrage of sperm to her face. Isn’t nature wonderful?

  19. Nick Nolte Red Face Bumper Cars Malibu Chili Cook Off
    Commented on this photo:

    Here we see Nick Nolte’s screen test for the role of “Red Hulk” in the new, upcoming Marvel motion picture.

  20. Prince Harry WellChild Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    So…Who’s up for a quick game of pool then?

  21. Kirstie Alley Fat Legs Spandex
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    How many large bags can you find in this photograph?

    [Hint: Five.]

  22. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face US Open
    Commented on this photo:

    How could there not be a Stepford Wives 2, 3 and 4?

  23. Phoebe Price Bikini
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    she’s modeling for a flotation device company now?

  24. Spike Lee Tuxedo 69th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s weird…I always thought that Damon Wayans played the role of Handi Man.

  25. Katie Holmes Butt Tight Jeans Suri Cruise
    Commented on this photo:

    Suri: Mirabile dictu, don’t you agree?
    Katie: You speak Latin?
    Suri: Ego te absolvo.
    Katie: Quod nomen mihi est?
    Suri: Bon Jour.
    Katie: Quod nomen mihi est?
    Suri: La plume de ma tante.

  26. Tobey Maguire Bermuda Shorts White T Shirt Daughter Ruby
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    “gotta run, play date with Suri …”

  27. Michael Fassbender Laughing  69th Venice International Film Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Did I think Prometheus was a good movie? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
    ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
    ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
    ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha,
    ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!

  28. Joaquin Phoenix The Master Premiere 69th Venice International Film Festival
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    gotta dress nice for the arraignment

  29. Gary Busey Shirt Over Head Sunglasses Steffanie Sampson
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s the only way that she will go out with him.

  30. Janice Dickinson Upskirt Panty Flash
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought she died back in 1984?

  31. Melissa Molinaro Cleavage Rob Riley Shirtless
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess how many minutes later that the police were called.

  32. Pierce Brosnan Belly Unbuttoned Shirt Love Is All You Need Premiere 69th Venice International Film Festival
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    OMG … is that Tara Reid on the left?

  33. Janice Dickinson Upskirt Panty Flash
    Commented on this photo:

    In all fairness, her middle toe on the left foot still looks really, REALLY good!

  34. Amber Rose Huge Butt Yoga Pants
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    She really should wear stripper heels with that outfit

  35. Kim Kardashian Kanye West Ridiculous Clothes
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is he wearing white?

  36. Kim Kardashian Kanye West Ridiculous Clothes
    Commented on this photo:

    They must be going to a party, she’s wearing her shoe “sperm guards.”

  37. Vanessa Williams US Open
    Commented on this photo:

    My God…didn’t we learn our lesson from Nicole Kidman? Keep all attractive women away from tennis matches!

  38. Kirstie Alley Fat Legs Spandex
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    this is what Scientology will do to you

  39. Kirstie Alley Fat Legs Spandex
    Commented on this photo:

    She was so lucky that Shelly Long decided to quit Dancing with the Stars!

  40. Olga Sorokina Nipples The Master Premiere 69th Venice International Film Festival
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    the open top almost – almost – distracts you from her terrible make up job.

  41. Carrie Fisher Cigarette Blanket
    Commented on this photo:

    Drop the blanket and TA DAH! Oh wait, the elephant didn’t disappear.

  42. Carrie Fisher Cigarette Blanket
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, she could play Bruce Campbell’s mom on “Burn Notice,” Sharon Gless needs a smoking and drinking buddy

  43. Nick Nolte Red Face Bumper Cars Malibu Chili Cook Off
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    is it just me … or is Nolte morphing into Jack Nicholson?

  44. Kourtney Kardashian Cleavage Mason
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    evidently LA does not have a Child Protective Services agency

  45. Tobey Maguire Bermuda Shorts White T Shirt Daughter Ruby
    TheTrooffairy
    Commented on this photo:

    Forgot his training bra….AND they’re wearing almost matching prints. I’d say their outing was a success.

  46. Nicole Kidman Frozen Face US Open
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    “I … must … watch … tennis …”

  47. Janice Dickinson Upskirt Panty Flash
    TheTrooffairy
    Commented on this photo:

    “Alright, let’s go. I just sharted.”

  48. Amber Rose Huge Butt Yoga Pants
    TheTrooffairy
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like somebody took 2 fine hams & shoved them down the back of her pants….oooor she ate them…

  49. Nicole Richie Bikini
    Martina
    Commented on this photo:

    You know she’s D-Listed when she’s vacationing in Cabo.

  50. Coco Cleavage Tight Minidress
    TheTrooffairy
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like herpes to me.

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