The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 8.14.12

August 14th, 2012 // 519 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed that isn’t quite the behemoth that yesterday’s post was, but you probably missed that anyway on account of Katy Perry getting shitfaced and mooning an entire waterpark. Anyway, today we’ve got Jessie J subbing a guitar in place of a big black microphone, Brigitte Nielsen somehow stowed away in Stallone‘s luggage for The Expendables 2 press tour, and I continue my quest to always juxtapose Kim Kardashian‘s bag of chewed gum with an ass actually worthy of a feigned candid pose.

Speaking of asses, remember that chick from yesterday who was getting hers massaged by an aging Italian singer? She’s back in today’s Final Five,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Michelle Rodriguez Nipple See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    How Constantine keeps finding work, I’ll never know.

  2. Verne Troyer Scooter LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    BAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHA

  3. Gwyneth Paltrow No Make Up Tired Looking
    Kono Kalakaua
    Commented on this photo:

    Barbiturates and bitchiness don’t mix

  4. Taylor Swift Bikini Top Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    The band-aid on her knee? She was in a little plane crash after an assassination attempt made her late for an afternoon car accident.

  5. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt See Through Tights
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s having a Minaj with her butt cheeks.

  6. Ariane Bellamar Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    She is going to stand out in Barferly Hills.

  7. Jessie J Butt Cleavage Brian May Olympic Games Closing Ceremony
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Evidently it’s hard to think “sexy” when someone the same age as your granddaughter is splayed out at your feet.

  8. Sylvester Stallone
    Commented on this photo:

    Kid, its safer if you just back away.

  9. Shia LaBeouf Ponytail Beard Suit
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh my god! I just realized I’m Shia LeBouf. Shit.

  10. Sylvester Stallone
    mememe
    Commented on this photo:

    “Brigitte Nielsen?! No, I don’t have any more work for you, STOP FOLLOWING ME! Driver, hit the gas!”

  11. Marica Pellegrinelli Bikini
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice ass, seemed happy to be photographed…not bad.

  12. Corey Feldman See Through Shirt
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Respect. It would have been so easy for his brain to kick in at some stage while he was getting dressed and he’d have just come across as half assed

  13. Corey Feldman See Through Shirt
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Event organizer: “Hey get those girls with the chins over here for a photo. It’s just Corey Feldman.”

  14. Gwyneth Paltrow No Make Up Tired Looking
    Commented on this photo:

    Finally a picture that matches the filter my eyes put on all of her other pictures.

  15. Tobey Maguire Derp Face
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Doing is Horshak impression. RIP.

  16. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Swimsuit
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Gross. Stop posting this shit.

  17. Tobey Maguire Derp Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this the foam-rubber Muppet version of Tobey?

  18. Taylor Swift Bikini Top Robert F. Kennedy Jr.
    Contusion
    Commented on this photo:

    Ask not what your country music can do for you, but what you can do for your country music.

  19. Shia LaBeouf Ponytail Beard Suit
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    By his looks his douchebag fight club training has come to the “You’re gonna start a fight… and don’t worry about losing. You were going to anyway!” step.

  20. Corey Feldman See Through Shirt
    Ollie
    Commented on this photo:

    Charlie Sheen mini-me?

  21. Corey Feldman See Through Shirt
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, we know he’s pathetic but he got us in where we can meet some real sugar daddies!

  22. Constantine Maroulis Laura Osnes Deborah Cox
    swarley
    Commented on this photo:

    Bad case of Peter Griffin chin.

  23. Jessie J Butt Cleavage Brian May Olympic Games Closing Ceremony
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Why spend years collecting these classics? Phone this number now and order Time Life’s Closing Ceremony 10 CD Music Collection today!

  24. Jennifer Lawrence Cleavage Sports Bra Yoga Pants
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    This woman is stalking me! I’m not kidding. Every time I look she’s there. Please don’t stop her.

  25. Shia LaBeouf Ponytail Beard Suit
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    He just heard there’s a new Henry James out

  26. Sylvester Stallone
    Commented on this photo:

    “Get your own fucking ride, Tilda!”

  27. Sylvester Stallone
    dmbishop
    Commented on this photo:

    Start with this finger and we’ll see how it goes.

  28. Shia LaBeouf Ponytail Beard Suit
    bpsoup
    Commented on this photo:

    That suit’s too small, right?

  29. Tobey Maguire Derp Face
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Following Jennifer’s picture I just realized Tobey is her retarded brother.

  30. Marica Pellegrinelli Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    The backside was much better.

  31. Verne Troyer Scooter LAX
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Some days you’re seated beside a three hundred pound woman. And some days….

  32. Mary-Louise Parker Blond Wig Cleavage Legs Miniskirt
    Bionic_Crouton
    Commented on this photo:

    You know that the bearded guy’s best pick up line is “Why yes, I am Zack Galifanakis”.

  33. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Swimsuit
    CuriousTroll
    Commented on this photo:

    That ass and the back of those legs are so photoshopped it’s ridiculous. Does she think people are that stupid? KK makes me sad that I live on this planet.

  34. Marica Pellegrinelli Bikini
    Keno
    Commented on this photo:

    I spy with my zoomed eye…

  35. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Swimsuit
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember when Kelly Brook posted a very similar picture of herself on the beach? Use that lifeline right now!

  36. Mary-Louise Parker Blond Wig Cleavage Legs Miniskirt
    Evangelista
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus christ what did they DO to her?!

  37. AnnaLynne McCord Butt Tight Pants
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey!! Just who’s the condescending bitch here? Look at the finger. That’s right it’s me!

  38. Jean-Claude Van Damme
    Anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Hahaha…no seriously where do you store the coke you impound after a raid?

  39. Constantine Maroulis Laura Osnes Deborah Cox
    Evangelista
    Commented on this photo:

    Deborah look next to you! Run away!

  40. Corey Feldman See Through Shirt
    your mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Shouldn’t he have run out of hooker money by now?

  41. Nicki Minaj Huge Butt See Through Tights
    Evangelista
    Commented on this photo:

    WHY?

  42. Gwyneth Paltrow No Make Up Tired Looking
    Gwyneth
    Commented on this photo:

    Shoot you with an organic bullet… tastes like tarragon.

  43. Gwyneth Paltrow No Make Up Tired Looking
    your mom
    Commented on this photo:

    Hahaha! She looks poor!

  44. Corey Feldman See Through Shirt
    Perplexity
    Commented on this photo:

    Charlie Sheen wannabe

  45. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Swimsuit
    CK
    Commented on this photo:

    Beached whale, anyone? Beached whale?

  46. Carrie Keagan Cleavage
    Evangelista
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s some compression goin on there…

  47. Marica Pellegrinelli Bikini
    Evangelista
    Commented on this photo:

    A skeleton with boobs

  48. Ariane Bellamar Bikini
    Inner Retard
    Commented on this photo:

    I can already see the porn parody of this show. Ironically, also starring her.

  49. Mary-Louise Parker Blond Wig Cleavage Legs Miniskirt
    Bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    I Would!

  50. Kim Kardashian Huge Butt Swimsuit
    Mr. Poop the 2nd
    Commented on this photo:

    whore

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