The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 7.16.13

July 16th, 2013 // 344 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed that finds newly single George Clooney in Paris, because I hear 20-year-old French vagina is perfect this time of year. We’ve also got Chaz Bono whose nipplesque parts are somehow more realistic looking than Jennifer Nicole Lee‘s and finally (bear with me here) Valeria Golino, who we all wanted to bang when she was in Hot Shots and now look at what’s happened. Goddamn you, time, just goddamn you right to Hell.

Miss Bumbum Brasil‘s back as today’s Final Five. Probably should have just started and stopped with that,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Russell Brand Loose Yoga Pants Long Scarf
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    The guy on the right is heading straight for a 70s era Firebird, I just know it.

  2. Chaz Bono Shirtless Breast Removal Scar
    Amy
    Commented on this photo:

    Justin Bieber, looks a little bloated.

  3. Eli Roth Valeria Marini Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Tall, leggy, face like a melted marshmallow .. what’s not to love?

  4. Commented on this photo:

    Not Pictured : Five rolls of 500lb test line anchored to two steel I-beams.

  5. June Shannon GMA
    Commented on this photo:

    Flippers clapped, waiting for fish.

  6. Melissa McCarthy Getting Arm Sprayed St Vincent De Van Nuys
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    At first I thought she was releasing steam from under her arms.

  7. Valeria Golino Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Yep, I thought this was Sharon Stone.

  8. Carine Felizardo MIss Bumbum Brasil Winner Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Courtney Stodden : Welcome to your future.

  9. Corey Feldman JacQue Delgado 8th Annual BTE All-Star Celebrity Kickoff Party
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Ru Paul was downright convincing by comparison.

  10. Carine Felizardo MIss Bumbum Brasil Winner Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugh put it down, you have no idea what you are doing! That lens deserves someone with an IQ higher than its MFD.

  11. Vanessa Hudgens Butt Tight Pants
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    My mother called and wants her 80′s clothes back.

  12. Melissa McCarthy Getting Arm Sprayed St Vincent De Van Nuys
    Jenn
    Commented on this photo:

    Lose weight with new spray on Fat-away.

  13. Corey Feldman JacQue Delgado 8th Annual BTE All-Star Celebrity Kickoff Party
    Commented on this photo:

    If the glove doesn’t fit, you must be shit.

  14. Chaz Bono Shirtless Breast Removal Scar
    Paul
    Commented on this photo:

    Did anyone else think this was an after picture of Rob Kardashian?

  15. June Shannon GMA
    Commented on this photo:

    You know if she lost a ton of weight she’d be…..a ton.

  16. Chaz Bono Shirtless Breast Removal Scar
    Helena Handbasket
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks hotter that 80% of the dudes that I know.

  17. Valeria Golino Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    King Doosher
    Commented on this photo:

    She is hotter than a lightning bolt regardless of anything. Anyone should take this over any of whatever is passing for Hollywood Generic blonde/brunette/whatever that other thing was.

  18. Corey Feldman JacQue Delgado 8th Annual BTE All-Star Celebrity Kickoff Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Two is either the number of movies his escorts can name that he has been in or the highest number they can count to before asking for hints.

  19. Serena Williams Legs Bloomers Tennis Skirt SkiStar Swedish Open
    Commented on this photo:

    Serena tried to mix things up during the match with an interpretive dance break.

  20. Eli Roth Valeria Marini Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “How can I help you?”
    “Shield me from people while I tuck my penis back into my mini dress.”

  21. Commented on this photo:

    After this demonstration,Coco was asked not to return to the hospital.

  22. June Shannon GMA
    Commented on this photo:

    Her head looks like a big toe.

  23. June Shannon GMA
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone needs to tell her the national anthem does not begin with “Attention Walmart shoppers”.

  24. Jennifer Nicole Lee No Bra Nipples Pointing Up
    Commented on this photo:

    “Help! Someone put helium in my implants!”

  25. Valeria Golino Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Still looks better than Charlie Sheen.

  26. Hoda Kotb Kathie Lee Gifford Julie Scardina Huge Black Bird The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought these birds were only found around lifeless dried up holes?…Nevermind.

  27. George Clooney Raised Eyebrows
    Commented on this photo:

    He senses a woman half his age with daddy issues and low self esteem.

  28. Hoda Kotb Kathie Lee Gifford Julie Scardina Huge Black Bird The Today Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “Get out of here, Hasselbeck! Fox News is on the next block!”

  29. Carla Howe Melissa Howe Cleavage 8th Annual BTE All-Star Celebrity Kickoff Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn, look at those twins! Goddamn, look at those other twins!!

  30. Eli Roth Valeria Marini Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s probably the most frightening thing he’s ever been associated with.

  31. Miley Cyrus Midriff Holding Up Honey Boo Boo Picture ABC Studios
    Commented on this photo:

    #Justice4HoneyBooBoo

  32. Heidi Klum Swimsuit Instagram
    Mama Pinkus
    Commented on this photo:

    Just how much attention does that gal need? Much more than her children, it would seem.

  33. Carine Felizardo MIss Bumbum Brasil Winner Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    In Brazil, the transvaginal ultrasounds are technologically a little cruder…

  34. Eli Roth Valeria Marini Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    “I told her not to use helium in her butt implants, but bitch won’t listen.”

  35. Valeria Golino Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Commented on this photo:

    Part of me says I wouldn’t, but I know that lying sonofabitch.

  36. George Clooney Raised Eyebrows
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s already fucked 5 chicks hotter than Stacy Keibler in the time since their break-up.

  37. Hoda Kotb Kathie Lee Gifford Julie Scardina Huge Black Bird The Today Show
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    A bird in hand is worth more than any in their bushes.

  38. Vanessa Hudgens Butt Tight Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s a really sexy little spinner.

  39. Benedict Cumberbatch Long Curly Hair Derpface
    Commented on this photo:

    KHAN!!!!!

  40. Serena Williams Legs Bloomers Tennis Skirt SkiStar Swedish Open
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    When exposed to a crowd of people it is unfamiliar with, the woman-hippo-lion has a tendency to swirl its mane, and stride purposefully & menacingly towards the nearest human target. Truly a sight to behold.

  41. Carla Howe Melissa Howe Cleavage 8th Annual BTE All-Star Celebrity Kickoff Party
    Commented on this photo:

    The one on the left needs to stop raiding her 13 year old cousin’s closet for clothes.

  42. Kelly Hu
    Ripley's Believe It Or Not
    Commented on this photo:

    胡凯丽, or 胡凱麗 for the more traditional amongst you all.

    Yeah, it’s all Greek to me, too.

  43. Benedict Cumberbatch Long Curly Hair Derpface
    Vlad
    Commented on this photo:

    Cumberbatch prepping for his Orci/Kurtzman written, JJ Abrams directed remake of Napoleon Dynamite.

  44. Alyssa Milano Times Square Appearance
    Commented on this photo:

    “My… Precious!”

  45. Heidi Klum Swimsuit Instagram
    tball
    Commented on this photo:

    is the normal fish writer on break? This writing sucks.

  46. George Clooney Raised Eyebrows
    Commented on this photo:

    I just don’t see the appeal. Ick. He looks like he’d smell like stale cigars and Altoids.

  47. Hoda Kotb Kathie Lee Gifford Julie Scardina Huge Black Bird The Today Show
    Pippi Longcocking
    Commented on this photo:

    Hoda Kotb makes that face anytime her husband’s penis gets anywhere near any part of her body.

  48. Benedict Cumberbatch Long Curly Hair Derpface
    Pippi Longcocking
    Commented on this photo:

    Cumberbatch and his Asian Cumberbitches.

  49. Eli Roth Valeria Marini Cleavage Ischia Global Festival
    Pippi Longcocking
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that the new plastic-boobed slut he’s going to slice up in Hostel 3?

  50. June Shannon GMA
    Pippi Longcocking
    Commented on this photo:

    Free Willy: The Opera.

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