The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 7.15.14

July 15th, 2014 // 326 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which admittedly at first glance looks like an ad for high-end prostitution. A claim I’ll gladly refute because we don’t even get a tiny piece of the money the Kardashians earn from sex work. We do, however, earn money from the pageviews generated by your extremely time-worthy clicks on stuff like Will Smith‘s boner taking flight because space math, David McIntosh‘s boner taking flight because of Kelly Brook, and this guy‘s boner draining all the blood from his body, eventually killing him, because he’s touching Emily Ratajkowski in daisy dukes.

R.I.P. random douchey hat guy, your family will understand your worthy sacrifice,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Jamie Lynn Spears Performing At Gilleys Saloon Dance Hall & Bar B Que Treasure Island Hotel And Casino
    Commented on this photo:

    “Watch yourself, Jamie. That left index finger has come out of its holster so he can check you for anal/vaginal warts when you’re done singing.”

  2. Jake Kasdan Jason Segel Pointing At His Mouth Melvin Mar Sex Tape Screening After Party
    Commented on this photo:

    “See that right fucking there? That is a herpes blister right fucking there. I got it from that blonde skank when her pussy touched my lip right fucking there.”

  3. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Skirt Sideboob NBC Universal Summer TCA Tour Day 2
    MoreMariaNow!!
    Commented on this photo:

    Why only one pic?!?!

  4. Kristina Sofia Lisa Opie Butt Bikini
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    If she butt dials me by mistake, I’ll be fuckin’ thrilled.

  5. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Daisy Dukes Drunk Guy Ischia Global Fest Gala
    Quasi
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m sorry…it looks like he’s fisting his jeans with his right hand. I can’t unsee that now.

  6. Ozzy Osbourne Fat Lady In Spandex
    OnePerson
    Commented on this photo:

    “Poor guy, what a mess,” she thought.

  7. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Daisy Dukes Drunk Guy Ischia Global Fest Gala
    OnePerson
    Commented on this photo:

    O! O! O! Ohhhhh!

  8. Kate Hudson Cleavage Wish I Was Here Screening
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone really threw down the gauntlet busting out that microphone didn’t they?

    Looks like she’s game though.

  9. Kendall Jenner Lingerie Kris Jenner Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Ummmm… didn’t Seinfeld do an episode about a girl like this? Hot as hell in a certain kind of light, monster/hideous-beast mode in another?

    Seriously, you tell me what she’s wearing, I’d run to the Internet with my fapper ready. You show me a pic of this and my 7-hour-consult-a-doctor-erection is cured!

  10. Kendall Jenner Lingerie Kris Jenner Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m expecting her to spin around, grab her crotch and say “Hee-hee”

  11. Katherine Heigl Bitchface Screaming Mother Nancy LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    When you look up the word “bitch” in the dictionary, you’ll see this picture.

  12. Peter Dinklage Riding Scooter Wearing Bandana
    Commented on this photo:

    “It’s Lil Zed’s.”
    “Who’s Lil Zed?”
    “Lil Zed’s dead, baby. Lil Zed’s dead.”

  13. Kristina Sofia Lisa Opie Butt Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh, I thought the other chick’s name was Lisa Anthony.

  14. Kelly Brook Cleavage Cameltoe Spandex Pants David McIntosh Boner Spandex Pants
    CanadiaDan
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey babe, do you think your breast guy does calf implants too?”

  15. Kelly Brook Cleavage Cameltoe Spandex Pants David McIntosh Boner Spandex Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t see anybody but Kelly in this picture.

  16. Jamie Lynn Spears Performing At Gilleys Saloon Dance Hall & Bar B Que Treasure Island Hotel And Casino
    Commented on this photo:

    “Tell us how you ruined your career.”

  17. Whitney Cummings Cleavage See Through Tank Top Sweaty Cameltoe Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    A woman with no tits can make up for it in a multitude of other fun ways.

  18. Nick Cannon Side Eyeing Mario Lopez  Bud Lights Ultimate FIFA World Cup Viewing Party
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the NEW Gang Sign for the FudgePackers

  19. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Skirt Sideboob NBC Universal Summer TCA Tour Day 2
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    That reminds me. I need to go bowling soon.

  20. Miranda Lambert Cleavage Carrie Underwood Mugshot Something Bad Music Video
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s something about Carrie Underwood that I just don’t like. I don’t know what it is.

  21. Kelly Brook Cleavage Cameltoe Spandex Pants David McIntosh Boner Spandex Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait so I am the first to mention the obvious camel toe….
    For shame superficial posters for shame :)

  22. Miranda Lambert Cleavage Carrie Underwood Mugshot Something Bad Music Video
    Commented on this photo:

    One has a cute face and nice ass and the other has nice tits, let the weird science Frankenstein’s monsters experiments begin….

  23. Coco Buttcrack Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    OH. MY. FUCKING. GOD. Look at how perfect her ass is. Everything’s perfect!

  24. Tara Reid Belly See Through Dress Boyfreind Erez Eisen
    Commented on this photo:

    Keep that tummy under wraps.

  25. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Skirt Sideboob NBC Universal Summer TCA Tour Day 2
    Commented on this photo:

    Gos damn! It’s been too long since you posted Maria’s ass. It’s amazing.

  26. Nick Cannon Side Eyeing Mario Lopez  Bud Lights Ultimate FIFA World Cup Viewing Party
    Commented on this photo:

    “I mean…yo, I ain’t banging Mariah no mo’. Fro’ now on, I jist be bangin’ dis guy.”

  27. Ozzy Osbourne Fat Lady In Spandex
    Commented on this photo:

    Hell, I’d still do her. NO-NO-Nooooo. I wouldn’t touch her with a fork.

  28. Jennifer Lopez Legs Short Shorts Leah Remini Huge Ass
    Commented on this photo:

    Is J-Lo purposely ignoring Leah or is she just concentrating on walking and chewing gum simultaneously?

  29. Tara Reid Belly See Through Dress Boyfreind Erez Eisen
    Commented on this photo:

    Tara has been with more guys than the membership of the National Football League. In fact, I think she walked out on the NFL one weekend when they ran out of guys to fuck her. (She went to the NHL, I think.)

  30. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Skirt Sideboob NBC Universal Summer TCA Tour Day 2
    Commented on this photo:

    “Love at first lick” just doesn’t have the same ring to it as “Love at first sight.”

  31. Will Smith Boner Cliff Dive
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    I noticed that his wife and kids are in none of these pictures.

    Hey man, when you leave the country, you have to take those assholes with you… don’t leave ‘em here with us.

  32. Nicole Scherzinger Squeezing Cleavage Together
    Commented on this photo:

    “Nicki, you make me sticky.”

  33. Mireille Enos Huge Pregnant Belly Season 4 Premiere The Killing
    Commented on this photo:

    Season Four of “The Killing”? What the fuck happened to Seasons Two and Three?

  34. Nick Cannon Side Eyeing Mario Lopez  Bud Lights Ultimate FIFA World Cup Viewing Party
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    So is the black guy with the creepy moustache Nick Cannon or the dude from the Love Boat?

  35. Whitney Cummings Cleavage See Through Tank Top Sweaty Cameltoe Yoga Pants
    X BOYFRIEND
    Commented on this photo:

    I CALL HER WHITNEY CAME

  36. Rachel Bilson Pregnant Belly Legs Daisy Dukes
    Commented on this photo:

    My affection for this woman continually grows by leaps and bounds and knows no limits. (Now ya think I might be able to talk her into blowing me?)

  37. Ashley Greene Nipples No Bra Tight Shirt NBC Studios
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she looks great. I even like the pants. (A little bit.)

  38. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Daisy Dukes Drunk Guy Ischia Global Fest Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor bastard looks like he needs more heroin. Hopefully it will be enough to keep him impotent and put him into a deep, deep, deeeeep sleep.

  39. Kristina Sofia Lisa Opie Butt Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, Paw, why did you name me Opie?”

  40. Kristina Sofia Lisa Opie Butt Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    UNCLE! I give up. She’s fucking beautiful. You can let go of my arm now.”

  41. Nick Cannon Side Eyeing Mario Lopez  Bud Lights Ultimate FIFA World Cup Viewing Party
    Johnny Barbells
    Commented on this photo:

    …why does nick cannon always look like his farts hurt?

  42. Elisabetta Canalis Nipples Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    …i like her friend.

  43. Mireille Enos Huge Pregnant Belly Season 4 Premiere The Killing
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought it was Maitland Ward from the thumbnail. That would’ve been weird.

  44. Rosie Huntington Whiteley Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Dat ass.

  45. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Daisy Dukes Drunk Guy Ischia Global Fest Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Exposure to Emily Ratajkowski can have that effect on men. Use with caution.

  46. Kristina Sofia Lisa Opie Butt Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are some great asses for white girls. You have my attention now.

  47. Ozzy Osbourne Fat Lady In Spandex
    Commented on this photo:

    “Nice jacket Ozzy” “Thanks Gladys”

  48. Maria Menounos Butt Tight Skirt Sideboob NBC Universal Summer TCA Tour Day 2
    Commented on this photo:

    Good Lord! Now that is a piece of ass!

  49. Kelly Brook Cleavage Cameltoe Spandex Pants David McIntosh Boner Spandex Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure that girl ate Kelly Brook.

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