The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 5.27.14

May 27th, 2014 // 512 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which is fully stuffed thanks to a three-day, well technically four-day weekend since I’ve somehow turned going on day dates with Fish to the movies into a career. Reach for the stars, kids! Anyway, I managed to avoid all but one pic from that horseshit wedding, but I felt everyone needed to know what’s going on with Mos Def. Should we call someone? Aside from that, some of the usual players showed up like Uma Thurman trying out her new Dr. Scholl’s body spray, Kelly Brook making me care about her Instagram again, and this Alexander Skarsgard pic, which was the last thing every vagina at Chiltern Firehouse saw that night before birthing a thousand babies and dying.

Kenny G without a fuck to give on a bike is the new meme you’ve been looking for,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Kenny G Riding Bike With No Hands
    fuckface
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder if he’s
    *removes sunglasses*
    … Going Home.
    YEEEEEAAAAAAAHHHHH!

  2. January Jones Butt Bikin See Through Beach Cover Joel Silver Memorial Day Party
    fuckface
    Commented on this photo:

    when did Joel Silver die?

  3. Donnie Wahlberg Fedora Greeting Fans
    Commented on this photo:

    “I loved you when you were in New Kids on the Block!”
    “I loved you when you turned purple and had to be rolled away in Willie Wonka.”

  4. Adrian Grenier Shirtless With Bikini Chicks
    Commented on this photo:

    “Excuse me, how do you say in french I know I am not physically appealing but I am for unknown reasons famous and would like to have sex with you and your friends.”

    “Gerard Deipardieu”

  5. Gerard Butler Gods Of Egypt Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Only when it dawned on him that he did not have corn the previous night, did he realize somebody else shit in his box.

  6. January Jones Butt Bikin See Through Beach Cover Joel Silver Memorial Day Party
    Commented on this photo:

    “Happy birthday! Here’s a cat turd. Don’t eat it all at once, this has to last you through the week.”

  7. Gerard Butler Gods Of Egypt Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Step 2: Put your dick in the box

  8. Terry Richardson Eating Lunch With Justin Theroux
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m not gonna lie, I am into some pretty sick shit. But hold up a camera, take a few mediocre pictures and say it is art and people will let you get away with almost anything!”

  9. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Commented on this photo:

    if this is what democracy leads to, I’m rethinking my rejection of Socialism.

  10. Genevieve Morton Cleavage Weight Gain Greasy Face
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks good but her face.

  11. Sharon Stone Cleavage Nipples No Bra amfAR 21st Cinema Against AIDS Gala
    Ols
    Commented on this photo:

    Guys, for real, these belts are made from the leftover skin from Joan Rivers’ facelifts. She kindly donates the proceeds to AIDS foundations. I heard there are only 10 left in stock.

  12. Sharon Stone Cleavage Nipples No Bra amfAR 21st Cinema Against AIDS Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    gross.

  13. Heidi Klum Cleavage Hamptons Magazine Cover Celebration
    Commented on this photo:

    how come you never see aging models posing in front of current photos of themselves?

  14. Pamela Anderson Drunk High Husband Rick Salomon Scruffy Beard World Music Awards 2014 Pre Party
    Commented on this photo:

    This looks like another deadbeat college kid has to have his mom treat him to a hot meal at a chain restaurant where they sit down and she grills him about what is he going to do with the rest of his life reminding him pot smoking and skate boarding are not a marketable skill employers are looking for.

  15. Coco Naked Covered In Ribbon Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Coco’s world looks sticky

  16. Rosario Dawson Cleavage Crazy Face amfAR 21st Cinema Against AIDS Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    It seems kind of tacky to dress slutty at an AIDS benefit.

  17. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she get her lips inflated for the wedding?

  18. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Commented on this photo:

    If you were to get hit by that car, I don’t know what would get damaged more, your knees or your face.

  19. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Fake Tan Seminole Hard Rock Hotel Casino
    Commented on this photo:

    What the fuck is wrong with plastic surgeons? Do none of them know where boobs belong?

  20. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Too fat for those pants, but thin enough to be a part of Kim’s wedding.

  21. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Billy Ray
    Commented on this photo:

    It should’ve been me

  22. Kate Beckinsale Legs Short Shorts Joel Silver Memorial Day Party
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m Kate Beckinsale and you’re not.

    Not pictured: Mr. Beckinsale. Whatever his name is.

  23. Alexander Skarsgard Chiltern Firehouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry for the boner killer but he’s starting to look more like his dad.

  24. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Fake Tan Seminole Hard Rock Hotel Casino
    Commented on this photo:

    Somebody tell the bee girl from the blind melon video I found her outfit,

  25. John Travolta Creepy Goatee Clouds Of Sils Maria Premiere Cannes
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Good evenink. You are so young and full of life, such vitality. I vant to suck your…vell, you know…”

  26. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Senor Trout
    Commented on this photo:

    Big Ang + better stylist = this

  27. Olivia Wilde Jason Sudeikis Pushing Stroller
    Commented on this photo:

    that was quick

  28. Coco Naked Covered In Ribbon Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    A world of no sun because she blocks it out.

  29. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Judging from her knees, she got the funding for her next project.

  30. Giada De Laurentiis Cleavage Hugging Mel Brooks Drais Beach Club Nightclub Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    Work, work, work…hello boys, have a good night’s rest? I missed you!

  31. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Fake Tan Seminole Hard Rock Hotel Casino
    Commented on this photo:

    Unless you’ve got low hanging ol’ granny tits, how can you hide just 5% of your boobs and not show any nipple?

  32. John Travolta Creepy Goatee Clouds Of Sils Maria Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    He should make a Battlefield Earth 2. It can’t be any worse than his hairpiece.

  33. Pamela Anderson Drunk High Husband Rick Salomon Scruffy Beard World Music Awards 2014 Pre Party
    Commented on this photo:

    So many diseases, so so many diseases.

  34. Kellan Lutz Justin Bieber Loving Gaze Amber Lounge 2014 Gala
    gumbypokey
    Commented on this photo:

    The lesbian hairstyles are a bit much.

  35. Michael Madsen Red Face Double Chin Cannes Film Festival Closing Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to say something bad, but this dude lived his life balls out. Played some pretty kickass roles in some pretty kickass movies.

  36. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    ronaldo
    Commented on this photo:

    Dad most be proud

  37. John Travolta Creepy Goatee Clouds Of Sils Maria Premiere Cannes
    gumbypokey
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not the insecurity or vain denial that surprises me. It’s the fact that anyone can have the patience to sit through a procedure where 50,000 hairs are plugged into your scalp.

  38. Coco Naked Covered In Ribbon Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    See? It’s true what they said. Duct tape can’t fix everything.

  39. John Travolta Creepy Goatee Clouds Of Sils Maria Premiere Cannes
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    Come on John it’s not such a hard question…when was the last time you had straight sex?

  40. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Ronaldo
    Commented on this photo:

    Noooooo….i thought she was staying in Paris…with the rest of that clan.

  41. Cher Holding Up Dancers Leg
    Slappy Magoo
    Commented on this photo:

    And this is why I don’t go see “live” concerts, no one sings for real anymore. She’s not even trying to hide the fact that she’s layering an echo effect on her voice!

  42. Donnie Wahlberg Fedora Greeting Fans
    Commented on this photo:

    Thank you for keeping Wahlburgers in business.”

  43. Nudgie

    WOW! Amazing that she would show her boobs!

    What?

    Oh – never mind.

  44. Gerard Butler Gods Of Egypt Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “Dammit, this cooler is empty!… Who took my Zimas?!”

  45. Quentin Tarantino Slicked Back Hair Smelling Uma Thurmans Neck Cannes Film Festival Closing Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    “Do you wanna see my extended version of Django Unchained? Spoiler alert, Django is what I call my penis.”

  46. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m sure Woody Allen is out there somewhere wishing this was twelve years ago.

  47. Olivia Wilde Jason Sudeikis Pushing Stroller
    Commented on this photo:

    Jason thought his wife would find it funny when he put the baby on the leash and the dog in the carriage…

    Jason thought wrong.

  48. Olivia Wilde Jason Sudeikis Pushing Stroller
    fred
    Commented on this photo:

    As Jason found out the hard way, somebody somewhere is sick of her shit.

  49. Rosario Dawson Cleavage Crazy Face amfAR 21st Cinema Against AIDS Gala
    fred
    Commented on this photo:

    Business on the side, party on the side.

  50. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    fred
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like a Bond villain. Cuntrapussy? GolddiggerFinger? BlowBlackGuysForMoneyFeld? Felicity WillingToDoAnyghingForMoney? Ms. Big (Ass)? Dr. No (unless you pay me, then Yes)?

    It will come to me.

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