The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 5.27.14

May 27th, 2014 // 512 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which is fully stuffed thanks to a three-day, well technically four-day weekend since I’ve somehow turned going on day dates with Fish to the movies into a career. Reach for the stars, kids! Anyway, I managed to avoid all but one pic from that horseshit wedding, but I felt everyone needed to know what’s going on with Mos Def. Should we call someone? Aside from that, some of the usual players showed up like Uma Thurman trying out her new Dr. Scholl’s body spray, Kelly Brook making me care about her Instagram again, and this Alexander Skarsgard pic, which was the last thing every vagina at Chiltern Firehouse saw that night before birthing a thousand babies and dying.

Kenny G without a fuck to give on a bike is the new meme you’ve been looking for,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Emily Ratajkowski Topless Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    She could wear an SS uniform and I’d still bang her stupid…

  2. Gerard Butler Gods Of Egypt Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well, I mean it’s a historically accurate place to poop, but it’s not what I had in mind when I asked the prop guys for a port-a-potty in the background…”

  3. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d be willing to bet one of my kidneys this is a poster hanging on the CDC’s wall…

  4. Alexander Skarsgard Chiltern Firehouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Great. Now I’m pregnant.

  5. Kellan Lutz Justin Bieber Loving Gaze Amber Lounge 2014 Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “So, listen here, Justine: If you can keep it discrete, I am more than willing to call you Miley for the night”

  6. Kelly Brook Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, is it just me or do they look bigger? Not complaining. Quite the opposite in fact.

  7. John Travolta Creepy Goatee Clouds Of Sils Maria Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that cum? On your glasses?

    You’re goddamn right it is.

  8. Donnie Wahlberg Fedora Greeting Fans
    maoix
    Commented on this photo:

    Doing research for an upcoming role as Captain Ahab.

  9. Rose McGowan Side Boob Chateau Marmont
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahhh.. Now I see why she’s single.

  10. Mos Def Crazy Clothes Kim Kanye Wedding
    Commented on this photo:

    Mos Def? Or Mos Blind?

  11. Quentin Tarantino Slicked Back Hair Smelling Uma Thurmans Neck Cannes Film Festival Closing Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    You know, I never did get why he kept casting her in his movies and then it hit me: She has huge hands and feet.

  12. Coco Naked Covered In Ribbon Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Fruit by the (hundred) Foot

  13. Naomi Watts Holding Dog In Front Of No Dogs Allowed Sign
    Commented on this photo:

    In her defense, that is a service dog. A little peanut butter in the right spot, and it performs a service.

  14. Adrian Grenier Shirtless With Bikini Chicks
    Commented on this photo:

    He thought he could just walk onto Leo’s boat?

  15. Michael Madsen Red Face Double Chin Cannes Film Festival Closing Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    Guess what, I think I’m parked in the red-zone!

  16. Adrian Grenier Shirtless With Bikini Chicks
    Jimmy
    Commented on this photo:

    What a life. Get it while you can, Adrian.

  17. January Jones Butt Bikin See Through Beach Cover Joel Silver Memorial Day Party
    Commented on this photo:

    No way that’s her son. There’s just no way.

  18. Terry Richardson Eating Lunch With Justin Theroux
    Commented on this photo:

    Meeting of the douchebags…

  19. Rose McGowan Side Boob Chateau Marmont
    nomnomnom
    Commented on this photo:

    I see her transformation into Mickey Rourke is nearly complete.

    • Mike

      The thumbnail leading to the picture makes her look like Drew Barrymore. Who Rose is hotter than despite the fucked-up face.

  20. Max George Bikini Model Ocean Club Champagne Spray Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Nailing a slew of hot women will never take the stain of the Lohan off your soul….

  21. Naomi Watts Holding Dog In Front Of No Dogs Allowed Sign
    Steve R.
    Commented on this photo:

    Naomi’s tweet later that day. “I don’t follow the rules #thuglife.”

  22. Iggy Azalea Huge Butt Fishnets
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d eat gravel off that ass..

  23. Giada De Laurentiis Cleavage Hugging Mel Brooks Drais Beach Club Nightclub Grand Opening
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s good to be the king….

  24. Cher Holding Up Dancers Leg
    ultra
    Commented on this photo:

    if cher struck that pose (or attempted to), it would sound like someone pulling velcro apart. i commend her restraint.

  25. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck yes

  26. Leslie Mann Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    This is nassitol at 40.

  27. John Travolta Creepy Goatee Clouds Of Sils Maria Premiere Cannes
    Commented on this photo:

    He just can’t face the fact that he’s bald

  28. Emily Ratajkowski Topless Cleavage Instagram
    renotastic
    Commented on this photo:

    “Aha! Yes, I see. Paula Patton looks waaaay hotter through these!”

  29. Nicki Minaj Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    At least she can crop/frame the image properly so that her titties upstage her face.

  30. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Suitcase contents: crossbow and bandolier.

  31. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Commented on this photo:

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

  32. Gerard Butler Gods Of Egypt Set
    renotastic
    Commented on this photo:

    “My ancient vinyl will fit nicely in these!”

  33. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    renotastic
    Commented on this photo:

    “GIMME A ‘V’ FOR…UM…COOCHIE, Y’ALL!!”

  34. Rose McGowan Side Boob Chateau Marmont
    Sam
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sweet Lord, take me now”

  35. Kenny G Riding Bike With No Hands
    Alamander
    Commented on this photo:

    “Look Mom! No career! I MEAN HANDS! Fuck! ……I meant hands.”

  36. Cher Holding Up Dancers Leg
    Commented on this photo:

    Cher’s doing a magic trick, shes going to hide her career in the the woman’s crotch.

  37. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    A Gorilla
    Commented on this photo:

    “Sir, how exactly did you get skid marks ON TOP of your hood?”

  38. Donnie Wahlberg Fedora Greeting Fans
    Commented on this photo:

    My wife says your Diabetes is from vaccines.

  39. Kellan Lutz Justin Bieber Loving Gaze Amber Lounge 2014 Gala
    renotastic
    Commented on this photo:

    “Don’t worry, Dawg. This shirt’s coming off after the appetizers!”

  40. January Jones Butt Bikin See Through Beach Cover Joel Silver Memorial Day Party
    Commented on this photo:

    If you eat this whole bar of soap, Mommy will give you a dollar.

  41. Adrienne Bailon Cleavage Fake Tan Seminole Hard Rock Hotel Casino
    Commented on this photo:

    What the hell is that ?

  42. January Jones Butt Bikin See Through Beach Cover Joel Silver Memorial Day Party
    Commented on this photo:

    “Who is my daddy?”

    “Shut up and play with this handful of sand”

  43. Emily Ratajkowski Topless Cleavage Instagram
    Frank Burns
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that she’s wearing beer goggles, I finally have a chance! Right??

  44. Gerard Butler Gods Of Egypt Set
    Smapdi
    Commented on this photo:

    “This Is STORAGE!”

  45. Khloe Kardashian Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t fall for it. She looks half-way hot here but ONLY and BECAUSE of the aviators. Take the sunglasses off and it’s like opening the Ark of the Covenant, your face will melt off just like the Nazi’s.

  46. Coco Naked Covered In Ribbon Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Coco’s world. Population: 1

  47. Quentin Tarantino Slicked Back Hair Smelling Uma Thurmans Neck Cannes Film Festival Closing Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    When did Quentin Tarantino start looking like Grandpa Munster?

  48. Kenny G Riding Bike With No Hands
    Alamander
    Commented on this photo:

    …Is also probably wealthier than I’ll ever be.

  49. Miley Cyrus Legs Spread On Hood Of Car
    Smapdi
    Commented on this photo:

    For a moment, I was elated thinking the car had run her over.

  50. Kellan Lutz Justin Bieber Loving Gaze Amber Lounge 2014 Gala
    Juch
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re cute!”
    “No, you are!”
    “You are super cute!”
    “I know you are but what am I?”
    “You are super dreamy extra cute with kittens!”
    . . .

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