The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 5.13.14

May 13th, 2014 // 355 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed where I’m safe under Emily Ratajkowski‘s butt to put any words at all down here since nobody’s around, so I think I’ll do today’s jokes in the style of Donald Sterling. What could go wrong? Take a look at Wesley Snipes here, convicted tax cheat and yet he’s on red carpets acting like he’s not going to talk through the whole movie. And what about Jada Pinkawhatever? I can’t even pronounce that one, but I heard she’s fine with her teenage daughter posting pornographic pictures online! Where’s the outrage for her, or should we ask the grandmother who’s probably raising her anyway? It really doesn’t seem fair to me. I’m almost as sad over this as Jonah Hill was when the waitress told him the fryer was broken.

*rereads post, worries, remembers Donald Sterling is a pile of dogshit in the rain, clicks publish,*

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she trying to tease Chris Brown with a boxing type outfit? Because if she is, she just became all that much more awesome…

  2. Lea Michele Nipple Slip Fox Upronts Party
    Commented on this photo:

    I can see Cory’s ghost trying to close that gap….

  3. Angelina Jolie White Powder Face Makeup Malfunction Brad Pitt The Normal Heart Screening
    Commented on this photo:

    She wasn’t going to let Mariah be the only person who went to Terry Richardson with her children…

  4. Fan Bingbing Hugh Jackman X Men Days Of Future Past Beijing Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    Working her like a puppet…

  5. Perla Hudson Nipple Slip Slash MusiCares MAP Fund Benefit Concert
    margaret
    Commented on this photo:

    GRoss.

  6. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    Commented on this photo:

    Look, I’m as realistic as the next guy but couldn’t she have tried porn like her sister before signing up for the circus?

  7. Jonah Hill Angry Face Hugos
    Commented on this photo:

    If that’s not the “I shall not be made for my pastrami sandwich” look, I don’t know what is…

  8. Fan Bingbing Hugh Jackman X Men Days Of Future Past Beijing Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    I like how this looks like one of those portraits you get at Sears.

  9. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Bikini Instagram
    Don Zaloog
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes! Yes! All day Yes!. Ooops, my pants….

  10. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    Commented on this photo:

    They’ve finally found something more efficient at taking out buildings than a wrecking ball.

  11. Wesley Snipes Double Peace Sign X Men Days Of Future Past Premiere London
    Commented on this photo:

    Wesley! Wesley! How many shower rapes did you go through a week???

  12. Courtney Love Drunk Cleavage Legs Minidress Back Of Cab
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks worse than Kurt Cobain does now.

    Too soon?

  13. Ian McKellen Patrick Stewart X Men Days Of Future Past Premiere London
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Love these old dudes. Tweet on seniors!

  14. Emily Ratajkowski Butt Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    The “04″ in the photo refers to her being named by FHM Magazine as the 4th sexiest woman in the world.

  15. Donald Trump Shannon Airport Dublin
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha! His face almost matches the color of the background. Excellent.

  16. Angelina Jolie White Powder Face Makeup Malfunction Brad Pitt The Normal Heart Screening
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    POWDER 911

  17. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    Commented on this photo:

    Is too much to ask for another trapeze accident this soon, God?

  18. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    jackman
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder how long it took for the ropes to snap.

  19. Lea Michele Nipple Slip Fox Upronts Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Seems that someone forgot the nipple tape.

  20. Lea Michele Nipple Slip Fox Upronts Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Bingo! View Full Size… zoom to 400% and… nipple!

    I have a sad, sad life.

  21. Courtney Love Drunk Cleavage Legs Minidress Back Of Cab
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Those flowers tattoos make her look so fresh and feminine.

  22. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    papaschmurfenstein
    Commented on this photo:

    BEHOLD! the Wookiee gracefully swinging through the trees of its native planet, Kashyyyk.

  23. Coco Side Boob Butt Minidress Coco & The Vanity Vixens Show Red Carpet
    heythere
    Commented on this photo:

    Ooooh, she has a butt!…so do the rest of us dum dum!

  24. Courtney Love Drunk Cleavage Legs Minidress Back Of Cab
    Commented on this photo:

    Gas builds up as the animal’s viscera and stomach contents decompose, but whale skin and blubber are tough. The massive throat pouch that you see inflating in all the pictures is designed to fill with seawater and then force it out through baleen.

  25. Angelina Jolie White Powder Face Makeup Malfunction Brad Pitt The Normal Heart Screening
    Commented on this photo:

    that basically sums me up for most of my 20s

  26. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    The Ringling Bros circus is taking no chances with it’s aerial safety equipment this time around. The pre-show testing has now been raised to a whole new level.

  27. Jada Pinkett Smith Muscular Cleavage
    anon
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks toe up from the flo up!

  28. Jonah Hill Angry Face Hugos
    Commented on this photo:

    Huge-O’s.

  29. Fan Bingbing Hugh Jackman X Men Days Of Future Past Beijing Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    *sniff*
    (Eww. Pussy)

  30. Sharon Osbourne Yelling Into Cellphone
    Commented on this photo:

    Kris Jenner and this SLAG should fight to the death, with the winner being beamed into a ‘Phantom Zone’-type black hole shaped like a giant vagina. that is all.

  31. Rita Moreno Kissing Ricky Martin People 50 Most Beautiful Issue Event
    kafak
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s mentally sprinting even farther into his gayness

  32. Angelina Jolie White Powder Face Makeup Malfunction Brad Pitt The Normal Heart Screening
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone had the wrong idea about “pancake makeup”.

  33. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    Commented on this photo:

    (insert Tarzan cry)

  34. Candice Swanepoel Nipples No Bra Doutzen Kroes Pregnant Belly
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Footwear fashion crime caught in progress.
    Must look away before I suffer even more mental anguish.

  35. Jada Pinkett Smith Muscular Cleavage
    Covert Pedophile
    Commented on this photo:

    Gross. Where’s willow?

  36. Courtney Love Drunk Cleavage Legs Minidress Back Of Cab
    Commented on this photo:

    She was found this way this morning. Coroners are still attempting to determine a time of death.

  37. Ke$ha Bra See Through Top Green Sunglasses JFK Airport
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks… deloused.

  38. Terrence Howard Sandals Wife Mira Christine Pak
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s learned lessons from his past mistakes.
    Those reinforced wrist braces will give his fists the extra support he needs next time he smacks his bitch up.

  39. Fan Bingbing Hugh Jackman X Men Days Of Future Past Beijing Press Conference
    Commented on this photo:

    This looks like two completely different pictures photoshopped together. One used Unsharp Mask, and the other didn’t.

  40. Perla Hudson Nipple Slip Slash MusiCares MAP Fund Benefit Concert
    Commented on this photo:

    Protip: If the sight of just half of your nipple makes people want to turn away and retch, maybe nip slips are not the way to go in your famewhore efforts.

  41. Donald Trump Shannon Airport Dublin
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    The Oompa Loompas need to rein in their regent.

  42. Perla Hudson Nipple Slip Slash MusiCares MAP Fund Benefit Concert
    Commented on this photo:

    C’mon man, you’re SLASH! get yourself some mid 20s trim

  43. Khloe Kardashian Swinging On Trapeze
    Commented on this photo:

    Training for the next American Tourister commercial.

  44. Jonah Hill Angry Face Hugos
    Commented on this photo:

    Uh oh. Looks like Leo took him to lunch for The Talk.

  45. Katherine Heigl Alfre Woodard Pointing At Cameras NBC Upront Presentation
    Commented on this photo:

    “No… no… no… OH!! Look!! That one’s actually pointing at us! Quick, smile!”

  46. Misty Copleand Nipple Pasties See Through Dress American Ballet Theatre Opening Night 2014 Spring Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Pancake pasties.

  47. Katherine Heigl Alfre Woodard Pointing At Cameras NBC Upront Presentation
    Commented on this photo:

    “And, that’s where you’ll be working Camera 3″
    “I used to be in front of these cameras.”
    “Yes, sure you did, dear.”

  48. Kelly Osbourne Wiping Off Ozzy Osbourne Mouth MusiCares MAP Fund Benefit Concert
    pbjelly
    Commented on this photo:

    Kelly gives Ozzy his daily “Miracle Max” chocolate pill.

  49. Donald Trump Shannon Airport Dublin
    Commented on this photo:

    I always wondered what Carrot Top would look like with inverted colors.

  50. Ke$ha Bra See Through Top Green Sunglasses JFK Airport
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks….almost completely de-accessorized.
    Show us your teeth…celebrity ID in doubt.

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