The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 3.12.13

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which is stuffed so full of douche you’d think it was a closet in Charlie Sheen’s guest bathroom. I hardly know where to begin, so I’ll just start with Ian Somerhalder who it seems has become the All-Douche, so much so that he totally dwarfs Shia LaBeouf’s hipster NYPD patronage. Then there’s Jim Carrey and Steven Tyler going face-to-face in an irrelevance showdown and finally, the Angel of Mapledouche, Justin Bieber, with his gilded fingerless crotch handlers.

It’s almost too overwhelming. Thank god I found a real rock legend to redeem myse– GODDAMNIT!

- Photo Boy

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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN