The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 3.12.13

March 12th, 2013 // 365 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which is stuffed so full of douche you’d think it was a closet in Charlie Sheen‘s guest bathroom. I hardly know where to begin, so I’ll just start with Ian Somerhalder who it seems has become the All-Douche, so much so that he totally dwarfs Shia LaBeouf‘s hipster NYPD patronage. Then there’s Jim Carrey and Steven Tyler going face-to-face in an irrelevance showdown and finally, the Angel of Mapledouche, Justin Bieber, with his gilded fingerless crotch handlers.

It’s almost too overwhelming. Thank god I found a real rock legend to redeem myse– GODDAMNIT!

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Ian Somerhalder Warner Brothers TV 2013 SXSW Party
    Commented on this photo:

    3D: Douchey, Douchey, Douchey.

  2. Vanessa Williams Laughing At Cuba Gooding Jr. Meet & Greet The Cast Of The Trip To Bountiful
    Commented on this photo:

    I had no idea he was still alive.

  3. Tom Hardy Kissing Puppy Animal Rescue Set
    Juch
    Commented on this photo:

    A puppy’s first prostate exam is always a tough one.

  4. Coco Cleavage See Through Shirt
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know that she deserves a wax figure, but it’s very lifelike.

  5. Tom Hardy Kissing Puppy Animal Rescue Set
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    Bestiality. Because animals can’t say no.

  6. Cary Elwes Scruffy Facial Hair The Incredible Burt Wonderstone Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    This is what happens when you rush the miracle man — you get rotten miracles.

  7. Justin Bieber Crotch Grab Gold Fingerless Goves
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    He needs more training if he’s still only using the little black microphone.

  8. Will.i.am Awful Clothing The Voice Photocall
    Commented on this photo:

    I think I finally understand what the Beebs is trying to achieve.

  9. Courtney Stodden Cleavage Twitter
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again, Everything in this picture is fake.

  10. Ian Somerhalder Warner Brothers TV 2013 SXSW Party
    johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Put on the special glasses and it’s like the douche-nozzle is spraying right at you!

  11. George Lucas Ron Howard The Academy Of Television Arts & Sciences 22nd Annual Hall of Fame Induction Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    “Have you considered shooting ‘Arrested Development’ in front of a green screen? People love that shit!”

  12. Tom Hardy Kissing Puppy Animal Rescue Set
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Your punishment must be more severe

  13. Prince Charles Wearing Slippers King Hussein Mosque Visit
    johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    “Right, I’ve put the silly curly slippers on, now ask him which way it is to the flying carpets, post-haste!”

  14. Ian Somerhalder Warner Brothers TV 2013 SXSW Party
    Commented on this photo:

    Future Scientologist, if you know what I mean.

  15. Tom Hardy Kissing Puppy Animal Rescue Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Judging from the look on the dog’s face, his breath must stink bad.

  16. Coco Cleavage See Through Shirt
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    When your ass is as wide as an elephant’s thighs…that’s a Moiré.

  17. Tom Hardy Kissing Puppy Animal Rescue Set
    Commented on this photo:

    finally, a worthwhile picture

  18. Shia LaBeouf NYPD Hoodie
    johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Coming up with utterly lame, at times plagiarized, witless dull barbs to sling at Alec Baldwin is really starting to consume his every waking moment…

  19. Shia LaBeouf NYPD Hoodie
    Commented on this photo:

    Hopefully the NYPD will be highly insulted by this and they beat this idiot to death.

  20. Courtney Stodden Cleavage Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Give her credit, she’s getting closer to perfection. Now if only she can find a much bigger hat.

  21. Courtney Stodden Cleavage Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Why? Why does she continue to think (okay, let’s assume that she’s capable of that for a minute) she has anywhere to go in this so-called “career path”? What? There’s a shortage of women who want to show their tits in the world? Pretty sure you can see titties ANYWHERE – and better ones at that.

  22. Deborah Harry Susan Sarandon Padma Lakshmi 5th Annual Blossom Ball Event
    Commented on this photo:

    This is not at Madam Tassaud’s?

  23. Deborah Harry Susan Sarandon Padma Lakshmi 5th Annual Blossom Ball Event
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    This certainly is a random smattering of crazy

  24. Coco Cleavage See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    4 boobs, mininum.

  25. Eva Longoria Butt 2013 Laureus World Sports Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve seen butts at Wal-Mart…you know, where should be working.

  26. Will.i.am Awful Clothing The Voice Photocall
    Commented on this photo:

    He should write a book called “How to look like a fucking douchebag all the damn time”.

  27. Jim Carrey Steven Tyler Face To Face The Incredible Burt Wonderstone Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Steven: “No. I am your father. ”
    Jim: “No. No. That’s not true. That’s impossible!”

  28. Axl Rose Double Chin
    Commented on this photo:

    Sigh, remember when old man Axl was a god.

  29. Robert Patterson Jeff Hilliard The Incredible Burt Wonderstone Premiere
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know whose names those are, but the guy in the red shoes is definitely a Jonas brother.

  30. Demi Lovato See Through Skirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Untalented, ugly with ugly fat legs.

  31. Beth Tweddle High Kick Leg Stretch Ice Skates Daniel Whiston Celebrities On Ice Photocall
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    B: “Imagine the positions we could do it in?” *wink!wink!*
    D: “I’m gay.”
    B: “FUCK! Another six months of yoga classes shot to hell!”

  32. Demi Lovato See Through Skirt
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure this is Demi Moore from 1991

  33. Justin Bieber Crotch Grab Gold Fingerless Goves
    Commented on this photo:

    He must be working out. He’s almost through the whole song and he hasn’t fainted once!

  34. Coco Cleavage See Through Shirt
    BillyEGrl
    Commented on this photo:

    I love CoCo!

  35. Prince Charles Wearing Slippers King Hussein Mosque Visit
    Commented on this photo:

    500 years of inbreeding had to the end badly. Here’s the proof, England.

  36. Goldie Hawn
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hee, hee, hee…Thank you , vaseline on the camera lens!”

  37. Coco Cleavage See Through Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    I got a rapper in the east, a rapper in the west.

    Some dude named AP9 likes to jack it on my chest.

  38. Robert Patterson Jeff Hilliard The Incredible Burt Wonderstone Premiere
    mandas
    Commented on this photo:

    8 year olds, Dude

  39. Deborah Harry Susan Sarandon Padma Lakshmi 5th Annual Blossom Ball Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Is Padma about to say, “Pack up your old whores and go home”?

  40. Axl Rose Double Chin
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m starting to think the Sweet Child he was referring to was Little Debbie.

  41. Jim Carrey Steven Tyler Face To Face The Incredible Burt Wonderstone Premiere
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Philo and Clyde roam the San Fernando Valley in search of cold beer, country music and the occasional punch-up.

  42. Courtney Stodden Cleavage Twitter
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    When does the naked pole dancing start?

  43. Demi Lovato See Through Skirt
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    In fairness to her, making yourself completely unattractive is the best way to stop people from stalking you.

  44. Shia LaBeouf NYPD Hoodie
    Commented on this photo:

    On his way to his audition for “Wooly Willy – The Movie”

  45. Claudia Romani Upskirt Panty Flash Thong Butt
    Commented on this photo:

    Legs like Minnie Mouse – yuck.

  46. Deborah Harry Susan Sarandon Padma Lakshmi 5th Annual Blossom Ball Event
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Deborah: “Call Me!”
    Susan: “Touch-a Touch-a Touch-a Touch Me!”
    Padme: “I’m not understanding what they are saying, but I’m appreciating it…”

  47. Kate Moss Lazy Eyes L'Oreal Kerastase Paris
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy shit… she snorted half of his shirt right off.

  48. George Lucas Ron Howard The Academy Of Television Arts & Sciences 22nd Annual Hall of Fame Induction Gala
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    “So what did you do after you directed American Graffiti ?”
    “In 1977 I directed a movie called Star Wars”
    “Then what ?”
    “Nothing”

  49. Melissa Joan Hart Huge Butt Tight Dress The Incredible Burt Wonderstone Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s not doing it right.

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