The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 2.28.12

February 28th, 2012 // 432 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed that’s sadly not even close to yesterday’s cornucopia of breasts (I like to believe this is why the pilgrims came here in the first place.) with a few exceptions. Anyway, what we do have is The Hoff‘s girlfriend Hayley Roberts who nearly died as a result of carelessly parking across from a Burger King, Jaime Pressly demonstrating the most effective method for keeping Jerry Sandusky off our playgrounds, and finally, the Johnny Depp/John Mayer singularity is upon us. Time to stock up that zombie apocalypse bunker.

The final five was either this or more Bethenny Frankel. Don’t ever say I never did nothin’ for ya,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jessica Jane-Clements
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    Who. The fuck. Is this???

  2. Erin Heatherton Adriana Lima Candice Swanepoel Victorias Secret
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    They’re lonely, they’re frustrated and Hawking won’t be back until the summer.

  3. Bruce Jenner
    fartbucket
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice jizz stain.

  4. Dan

    That’s Katy Perry’s face?!?

  5. Salma Hayek
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Geez, what’s with the lady behind her? Is there a fun aspect to flying anymore?

  6. Richard Dreyfuss
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Did he ever play a villain? Now would be a good time.

  7. Lindsay Lohan
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s really stepped up her game, she looks like garden variety bar trash as opposed to a $10-a-bj meth head.

  8. Johnny Depp
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    A lavender fag in the backpocket means what?

  9. Meatloaf
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘I have a penis?!’

  10. Jaime Pressly
    Moe
    Commented on this photo:

    I wish my tongue was that slide, for just that one moment. Anything after that, would be too pedo.

  11. Jessica Jane-Clements
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Kind of hot in a ‘I might be vinyl’ way.

  12. Jessica Jane-Clements
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She needs to turn around and hike up her shirt…only then can her merit as a human being be fairly determined.

  13. Johnny Depp
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    What he likes to do is sit for days in women’s wardrobes without being noticed.

  14. Jaime Pressly
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Not pictured: a grown woman acting her age.

  15. Bruce Jenner
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    When your done, give it an extra shake, just to be sure.

  16. Kim Kardashian
    vader
    Commented on this photo:

    I would love to shit in her mouth. Vapid cunt

  17. David Hasselhoff Hayley Roberts
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Ashamed to have her face shown in public with his.

  18. Meatloaf
    steel murkin
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow – Roger Ebert’s really looking good these days.

  19. Dolph Lundgren
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks thrilled.

  20. Richard Dreyfuss
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Trying to keep the blood from rushing out of his head.

  21. Lindsay Lohan
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Not shown: Tara Reid next to her.

  22. Bruce Jenner
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Paul McCartney really needs to work out more.

  23. Prince Charles
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    That is pretty sad that a chick with a huge goatee is still way better looking than his wife Camilla.

  24. Tara Reid
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    Ahh, the real Tara Reid has arrived.

  25. Tara Reid
    Tyler Durden
    Commented on this photo:

    She’ll suck your cock for $1000. Brandt can’t watch though. He has to pay $100

  26. Benicio Del Toro
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    This dude really is a real life werewolf. Anyone see his kid with Rod Stewart’s daughter yet? I have not and I think we know why.

  27. Salma Hayek
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    I went straight to, you know damn well where my eyes went straight to.

  28. Lindsay Lohan
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    How old is she again because she seems to be awful. If you told me 45, I would not call you a liar.

  29. Johnny Depp
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder how long it takes him in the morning to come up with these douchey ensembles?

  30. Meatloaf
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    WTF is that a pleather jacket, seriously?

  31. Bruce Jenner
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    So many questions about the stain on his pants, my brain is telling me that I don’t want to know.

    To think this was one of the greatest athletes of all time and he will die and be remembered for being the step-father to one of the greatest scourges to ever hit the Earth.

  32. Jessica Jane-Clements
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    WOW!!!

    Shut up and take my money.

  33. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:

    This week’s SNL is going to be awesome. Just kidding.

  34. Jessica Jane-Clements
    El Jefe
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck a Ferrari, if I win the lottery, I know what I am buying and she will be worth every penny.

  35. Tara Reid
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, where’s my career?

  36. Kim Kardashian
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    She releases pics like this every few days. Is there any reason to do this other than being a total attention whore ?

  37. Meatloaf
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    Stop right there!
    I gotta know right now!
    Before we go any further–!

    • somerandomchic

      *was* going to comment “I was barely 18 and I was barely dressed!” but you beat me to the reference. Hehe, cool.

  38. Katy Perry
    Elliott
    Commented on this photo:

    I know makeup can do wonders, but that does not look like Katy Perry in the least. I’d guess Megan Fox before ever saying Katy. She actually looks attractive here.

  39. Benicio Del Toro
    Commented on this photo:

    “Do you know why they call him Franky Four Fingers? Because he makes stupid bets with dangerous people.”

  40. Richard Dreyfuss
    Commented on this photo:

    …still looking for those 100 stars…

  41. Lindsay Lohan
    Commented on this photo:

    I can already picture the coroner’s big “Y” incision for the autopsy. Actually, the coroner may just tell the janitor that it’s Lindsay Lohan and let him finish the paperwork.

  42. Katy Perry
    aja
    Commented on this photo:

    does Interview know who Katy Perry is?

  43. Prince Charles
    Commented on this photo:

    “From one old goat to another…”

  44. Johnny Depp
    gingerpie
    Commented on this photo:

    granted he dresses himself blindfolded, but did anyone pay $1.29 at redbox to watch “the rum diary”? i did. well, i watched about an hour of it before i switched back to spongebob, but i don’t regret it. johnny depp looked ridiculously handsome in it–even prettier than aaron eckhart, and that’s hard to do. i still love this guy.

  45. Benicio Del Toro
    ri
    Commented on this photo:

    Remake of Scrooged is filming now. He got David Johansens part.

  46. Dolph Lundgren
    ri
    Commented on this photo:

    Which star did he go with?

  47. Johnny Depp
    ri
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he trying to look like John Mayer? Someone should tell him Johnny Depp has way more style.

  48. Bruce Jenner
    ri
    Commented on this photo:

    This guy should be dressed in full pimp regalia because he has cashed in on those whores like a boss. Kudos Bruce Go get yourself a congratulatory tummy tuck.

  49. Richard Dreyfuss
    Mike701
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m bringin’ Craazzy Baackk! Yup!”

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