The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 2.19.13

February 19th, 2013 // 528 Comments

Kate Middleton‘s baby bump!! EVERYONE FREAK THE FUCK OUT!!!1

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which took 3 days to compile thanks to a surprise quasi day off and an unsurprising amount of laziness on my behalf. What usually happens in this situation is I have an overabundance of ridiculous shit to slog through to bring you the randomest of titties and deathbloatedest(?) of faces and this gallery is no exception. So, I’m going to step out of the way and let you enjoy comment-worthy gold like this random woman and Cameron Diaz sharing how A-Rod preferred them to urinate, as well as proof that any man, even Cash Warren, will do anything to land a three-way, ditto goes for Jaime Foxx, and finally, Cirque du Soleil landing its own drag show parody.

Larry King getting “booty-bombed” almost became my new Prince Charles. Almost,

- Photo Boy

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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    Ladypants
    Commented on this photo:

    After enduring her and Louie Anderson that diving board should be awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

  2. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    Ladypants
    Commented on this photo:

    Between her and Louie Anderson that diving board deserves the Presidential Medal of Freedom.

  3. Anjelica Huston Smash Set
    hhh
    Commented on this photo:

    She was aging so gracefully up until a few years ago… now this. Can someone please tell me what happened? lip injections? weight gain?

  4. Sam Worthington Sunburned Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Got something of a Brosnan thing going on in this one. Can’t decide if that’s good or bad.

  5. Julie Brown Cleavage Vest
    Commented on this photo:

    I know I’ve seen her before, but I’m not sure if was the in Black Hole Sun or the Aerials video.

  6. Andressa Urach Huge Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry, I just don’t get the appeal of varicose zombie chicken legs.

  7. Anjelica Huston Smash Set
    Ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    Ms. Huston on the set of the remake of CRYBABY, where there is already Oscar buzz about her revamp of Hatchet-Face.

  8. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    Ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    “C’mon honey… do the leg thing for daddy?”

  9. Jon Voight Holding Camera Annual ACE Eddie Awards
    Ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    “C’mon honey… do the leg thing for daddy?”

  10. Lena Dunham Cleavage Yellow Teeth Writers Guild East Coast Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    This is the type of girl that hits on you when you’re out at night, drinking way too much and she offers you a ride back to her place, so you can “crash and hang out and stuff”.

    Your buddies all laugh at you behind your back as you stumble to her car, making out with her, she keeps trying to grab your dick, you know it’s a mistake and you don’t care. Every time she kisses you, you feel vomit percolate up in the back of your throat, just to barely get itself back down and you don’t care.

    She tells you that she actually doesn’t have a car and that you guys have to take a cab back to her place. She’s all over you in the back of the cab, you know she isn’t anything special and you’re both crazy drunk and she has that b.o. from dancing all night, but you don’t care.

    Eventually, you go back to her place. You drunkenly fuck each other. It’s weird, awkward, you try things, she tries things. She smells terrible in all the wrong places. You don’t care. You go to sleep, she’s still drunk. You don’t care.

    You wake up in the morning, see what you’ve fucked and then you start to care just a little. Things start to seem a little off. You realise that your friends know you fucked this girl and you start to care. She realise that she’s still drunk from the night before and aw, man… you start to care.

    You go to the washroom, clean yourself up, decided to just cut your losses, be nice about it, tell her it was a one time thing, “please don’t call” and most importantly don’t come by where you work to say, “hi”.

    You go back to the bedroom and see that she’s up and – holy shit, still drunk. Wait… she isn’t drunk… oh sweet-Mary-Mother-of-God…! She’s not drunk. She’s… she’s… retarded! You start to care and feel shame and sorrow and wonder how shitty your friends truly are. What the hell is wrong with you? You now care.

    But then she talks and you realise you’ve actually NOT slept with a retarded drunk chick, but with Lena Dunham and you feel better. Because, you don’t care.

    And oh yah, you throw up everywhere and your buddies make fun of you forever because well… you slept with Lena Dunham. Gross.

  11. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    donkeylicks
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she sharted

  12. Larry King Getting Booty Bombed 3rd Annual Streamy Awards in Hollywood
    bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    That that the pope is retired.. He can wear his street clothes. It seems that he digs black chicks.

  13. Nicole Eggert Swimsuit Splash Practice
    bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    She really does looks sexy… When standing beside Louis Anderson.

  14. Anjelica Huston Smash Set
    bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m so fucked up on Spanish Fly.. Anybody wanna fuck me”.

  15. Will.i.am Gold Shoes
    bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    His inner gay dude is trying to break out!

  16. Joe Pesci Handlebar Moustache Smoking Cigarette
    bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    Joe Pesci..Probably fucked Victoria Sveltsted..

  17. Boy George Skinny Weight Loss Yellow Teeth Sailor Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    Too bad there’s no makeup for teeth.

  18. Anthony Kiedis Girlfriend Asleep Lakers Game
    Commented on this photo:

    What a hoochie, in those CFM old-lady loafers.

  19. Lena Dunham Cleavage Yellow Teeth Writers Guild East Coast Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    She’d be cute if she whitened the toofers, stood up straight, and put some clothes on that actually fit her. Candidate for “What Not To Wear”.

  20. Tracy DiMarco Cleavaget Ice T Birthday Pary
    Commented on this photo:

    See, I think Lena Dunham is way more appealing and attractive than this disgusting mess of a person…this is just sick, because she thinks she’s hot.

  21. Andressa Urach Huge Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice rosary tattoo.

  22. Andressa Urach Huge Butt Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Everything looks good until you get down to the elephantiasis parts.

  23. Pink Wired Acrobatic Performance
    Inky Black
    Commented on this photo:

    Cool! A new Thunderbirds movie! When’s it out?

  24. Tracy DiMarco Cleavaget Ice T Birthday Pary
    Inky Black
    Commented on this photo:

    Oompa loompa

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