The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 12.18.12

December 18th, 2012 // 363 Comments

“Heath’s favorite cocktail, huh? Ah well, bottom’s up!”

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, which features two Taylor Lautner pics, not only because we’re already starting to feel the holiday content pinch, but also because this is clearly the happiest day of his life, not counting the time Travolta let him sit on his lap and steer the jet. We’ve also got Selma Blair‘s inappropriately chesty outfit, not for being too sexy, but for making me throw up the “delicious” McRib Fish made me eat at gunpoint. Finally, we’ve got Cesar Millan, who I’m not sure has ever made it in here before, but debuts today with his forceful, yet effective submission technique of burying two fingers deep into the anus and gazing into the eyes with a lusty stare.

Fun Fact: This technique also works on Tom Cruise,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Jude Law Scarf
    Critical Cretan
    Commented on this photo:

    Uncircumcised Prick!

  2. Bruce Sprinsteen Lady Gaga Terry Richardson
    diablorojo
    Commented on this photo:

    Bruce breezily threw on a scarf before heading out the door, never imagining he’d run into a young Edgar Winter. Serendipity.

  3. Selma Blair Bony Chest No Bra Under Open Sweater Playing With Son
    Commented on this photo:

    “Faster mommy I still smell that dirty dumpster !”

  4. Jane Lynch Eating
    DUPA
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor baby frog…. never stood a chance.

  5. Selma Blair Bony Chest No Bra Under Open Sweater Playing With Son
    Commented on this photo:

    The veins between her tits are mirrored by the shape of her hairline.

  6. Taylor Lautner Football Game
    Commented on this photo:

    THAT’S a tackle? Where’d he learn his moves? One of those Japanese train pushers?

  7. Olivier Sarkozy Mary-Kate Olsen New York Nicks Game
    mnsuperbee
    Commented on this photo:

    Take a note from Heath. Stop drinking it.

  8. Olivier Sarkozy Mary-Kate Olsen New York Nicks Game
    ElBurrito
    Commented on this photo:

    When she tires of his sweaty, gray, wild bushy jungle nuts she will dump him, or he will when he tires of her skinny ashtray mouth.

  9. Olivier Sarkozy Mary-Kate Olsen New York Nicks Game
    journalschism
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey, what’s in this shit? And why do you keep saying ‘And. here. we. go’ every time I sip?”

  10. Jared Leto Dressed In Drag The Dallas Buyers Club
    Commented on this photo:

    Leto sort of looks like Maria Shriver who sort of looks like Bruce Jenner … is this evolutionary convergence, or is there some kind of useless person union rule that I don’t know about?

  11. Olivier Sarkozy Mary-Kate Olsen New York Nicks Game
    Grand Dragon
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yuck Mary-Kate, this cup of your piss tastes like gin.”

  12. Selma Blair Bony Chest No Bra Under Open Sweater Playing With Son
    Ronaldo
    Commented on this photo:

    Its a man!, baby!!

  13. Olivier Sarkozy Mary-Kate Olsen New York Nicks Game
    Buddy The Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    One of the RICHEST women on the planet, and that is the best you can do?

    How sad.

  14. Taylor Lautner Football Game
    Commented on this photo:

    That dude has the most fucked up looking face. There…I’ve said it.

  15. Bruce Sprinsteen Lady Gaga Terry Richardson
    Commented on this photo:

    Neither Gaga nor Richardson deserve to be even breathing the same air as him. I suggest they both stop breathing immediately.

  16. Taylor Lautner Football Game
    Tinka
    Commented on this photo:

    I honestly thought it was Ashton Kutcher in this pic. Don’t know if that should be taken as an insult or a compliment in this case, though.

  17. Quentin Tarantino Samuel L Jackson Kerry Washington Jamie Foxx 106 & Park
    Commented on this photo:

    Shoes too big are.

  18. Cesar Millan Hodling Dog Up To Face North Shore Animal League 2012 Awards Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    As funny as the comments are, I love Cesar. He’s a good guy.

  19. Jessica-Jane Clement Cleavage Bra See Through Dress The Double Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Really guys? She looks like your average club girl/bartender. Nothing spectacular.

  20.  Maude Garrett Cleavage Miniskirt The Hobbit An Unexpected Journey Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s showing you where she buried the bodies.

  21. Rose McGowan Charity Meets Fashion Holiday Celebration Honoring The World's Children At Affirmation Arts
    Commented on this photo:

    Nope. Nope nope nope.

  22. Ewan McGregor Jimmy Fallon Green Screen
    fruity steve
    Commented on this photo:

    Jimmy Fallon must be telling a joke because of the way he’s laughing at how funny he is

  23. Rose McGowan Charity Meets Fashion Holiday Celebration Honoring The World's Children At Affirmation Arts
    fruity steve
    Commented on this photo:

    So Rose McGowan and Kim Catrall are now, officially, the same person?

  24. Taylor Lautner Football Game
    Beer Baron
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t mind us totally heterosexual guys doing heterosexual dogpiles!

  25. Rose McGowan Charity Meets Fashion Holiday Celebration Honoring The World's Children At Affirmation Arts
    Abraham Lincoln
    Commented on this photo:

    You people are fucking idiots…

  26. Taylor Lautner Football Game
    Shelby
    Commented on this photo:

    “Chase meee, Chase meeee!”

  27. Bruce Sprinsteen Lady Gaga Terry Richardson
    Three fingers
    Commented on this photo:

    Which one is which?

  28. Alanis Morissette Fat Mario Treadway
    EZ-B
    Commented on this photo:

    “What toppings do you want on your 3rd sundae of the day, dear?”
    “You outta know. “

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