The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 10.9.12

October 9th, 2012 // 603 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which lacks an Easter Egg like we left for you yesterday, but let’s be fair, there are only so many stand-ups willing to perform completely sackless. Wait, someone get Dane Cook on the line. Anyway, today we do have January Jones just before getting randomly selected for additional screening, as well as Tom Daley invoking the mythical power of Hamm Hog, and finally, just when it was looking like Mitt Romney‘s celebrity endorsements couldn’t get any classier, he pulls out the hillbilly ace-in-the-hole.

Fuchsia kicks are straight gangster,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Kristina Rihanoff Breast Cancer Awareness Sports Bra Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks like Portia De Rossi. You know, back when Portia De Rossi looked like Portia De Rossi.

  2. Maria Shriver Cleavage
    Animal
    Commented on this photo:

    The camera just caught her at an odd moment, is all. She actually looks much worse than this.

  3. Taylor Swift Butt Tight Shorts Radio 1 Teen Awards
    Hater
    Commented on this photo:

    My eight day clock just stopped.

  4. Kim Kardashian Leather Miniskirt Kanye West Pink Sneakers
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s smiling because there’s a camera, he wants to die for the same reason.

  5. Lady Gaga
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoa, there Gaga! Have a lump of sugar. Why the long face?

  6. Malin Akerman Nipples Tank Top
    alex
    Commented on this photo:

    Juna!!!

  7. David Spade Panama Hat Sunglasses
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Old dudes who used to be funny and no longer are yet keep mugging for the cameras at every opportunity are really sad (hope you’re reading this, Jim Carrey)

  8. Josh Brolin Oldboy Set
    Animal
    Commented on this photo:

    One of the Thunderbirds marionettes?

  9. Aaron Paul Pierce Brosnan Radiohead Concert Twitter
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Pierce, please, Crest White Strips.

  10. Stacy London Book Signing
    Commented on this photo:

    Her face is as annoying as Fran Drescher’s voice.

  11. Jennifer Lopez Butt Glittery Bodysuit
    Johnny P!
    Commented on this photo:

    Aguilera dreams of looking like this.

  12. Stacy London Book Signing
    Commented on this photo:

    “But I’m FAMOUS, I really am, I have a TV show and everything! LOVE MEEEEEEEEE!!!!”

  13. Demi Lovato Ripped Tights Pumping Gas
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    Gasoline fumes and thigh friction is a dangerous combination. Nobody better yell CHEESECAKE!

  14. Geraldo Rivera Bike Helmet
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Must be in between deliveries.

  15. Geraldo Rivera Bike Helmet
    Animal
    Commented on this photo:

    Such a great fall from his Al Capone’s Vault glory.

  16. Jenny McCarthy Cleavage Extra
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Come here, you little shit…is that a vaccination scar?”

  17. Kid Rock Mitt Romney Ryan Rally
    Commented on this photo:

    “Waitress? I’ll have a beer and a shot.”

  18. Stacy London Book Signing
    Animal
    Commented on this photo:

    One of those rare 70-year-old-plus women I’d f**k.

  19. Stacy London Book Signing
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve always found it ironic that fashion consultants are the most in need of a fashion consultant.

    • ChellaBella

      What is it in this picture that needs a makeover, exactly? The classic black blazer or the classic white blouse? The extremely current statement jewelry? Or the subdued ponytail? The metallic (and while I don’t really like, is also very fashionable now) nail polish?

      Just because you don’t like someone doesn’t mean they need a makeover.

      • KC

        She’s wearing WAY too much jewelry. Just pick the ring, the earrings, or ONE of the three(?) necklaces and stick with it.

      • I count at least five separate strands.

      • KC

        I think the skinny strands are all attached and technically one necklace. So that’s the skinny strands, the blue beads, the black things, and then the gold chain with the blue stones. Totaling at least seven loops around her neck. Although I assume there are a few that are too buried to see.

        And I changed my mind, those earrings should just be thrown away and never seen again. Or at least rip those giant prisms at the bottom off.

      • Billebuoy

        Her nail polish. Her dreaded hair color. Must we continue? Now get off this site if you’re going to defend these photos we live to peck apart, Chella.

      • Anastasia Beaverhausen

        I agree with KC. She’s over- and incorrectly- accessorized. It’s time to do away with the gray streak in the hair, the fuckin’ Bonnie Raitt, an dye it, already. We get it, London, you’re getting old. And speaking of that, never ever wear your hair in a ponytail again. Ever ever.

        Necklace does not compliment the neckline of the top. Necklace with giant earrings are bad. Lose the necklace. Earrings are fine, get a different ring and don’t you dare put on a different necklace…pull your hair out of that ponytail, whiten those teeth and done. Better.

      • hijkmno

        i kinda admire her for not fucking with herself…she won’t dye her hair (she’s had that grey streak since she was a teenager), she’s never gotten that nose taken care of and she most definitely could stand to have her teeth whitened.

        that being said…she looks like shit here.

      • ChellaBella

        I’ve spent enough years working in jewelry to say that I’d ditch the ring. The earrings aren’t for me but they are in style right now–and probably the same designer as the necklace (which is one necklace, not layers). The ponytail is meant to subdue the look–the statement is the jewelry. Her hair has had the grey streak for years and she doesn’t dye it. Good for her!

        And I don’t have to get off the site for offering a differing opinion. I don’t think she looks her best here by any means, but she looks fine and she doesn’t need a style makeover.

      • madashell

        Well, I happen to like her very much, but I’m with the haters on this outfit. It just doesn’t particularly flatter her and since that is her livelihood, she has to knock it out of the park every time. The earrings are too much with that necklace, the pony is dowdy and she looks the way she says no one is supposed to look–like she doesn’t care. And that bra ain’t doing her any favors.

      • tlmck

        I would say that, if she was going for Urban Transvestite, she nailed it.

    • Hay, tlmck, is that anything like when the Parking Enforcement vehicle is double-parked?

  20. Aaron Paul Pierce Brosnan Radiohead Concert Twitter
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    Creep(s).

  21. Shaggy
    Commented on this photo:

    He sounds taller on the radio

  22. Lady Gaga
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    - You complete me!
    - Fuck off!

    (I’ll let you decide who’s saying what.)

  23. Prince William Kate Middleton Atheletes In Sauna The Football Association's National Football Centre
    Commented on this photo:

    “Willy, not William. Ha! Of course! Quite a hilarious misunderstanding! Ha Ha! I will still touch it, though, if you fancy a little royal rumble, eh? What? OH, my wife! Well, now that’s two strikes for my ears today. Bless me, I must be getting deaf. Yes, it’s 1000 pounds if she’s to do it. Free of charge, if you prefer a princely handy.”

  24. Cheryl Cole Cleavage
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Judging from her dress, it looks more like the whisky missed.

  25. Kim Kardashian Leather Miniskirt Kanye West Pink Sneakers
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t have enough fingers to count all the things that are wrong with this picture

  26. Carla Gugino Cleavage Bra See Through Shirt
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Thong and topless or GTFO.

  27. Geraldo Rivera Bike Helmet
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    Being a bike messenger can be hard on the mustache.

  28. Tom Daley Speedo Diving Board
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, it’s the boy from a small town!

  29. Cheryl Cole Cleavage
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    CSI should probably check into those white specs on her dress.

  30. Kim Kardashian Leather Miniskirt Kanye West Pink Sneakers
    Commented on this photo:

    At least he’s never without a beach float.

  31. Jennifer Lopez Butt Glittery Bodysuit
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Notice the three guys she was sitting on before are notably absent.

  32. Michael Shannon Knit Hat Cut Off Shorts
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    He gets cast as eccentric characters? Hmph.

  33. Jennifer Lopez Butt Glittery Bodysuit
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    Wheeeeeee!!! I can flyyyy!!!

  34. Demi Lovato Ripped Tights Pumping Gas
    Jman
    Commented on this photo:

    We share a night of drunken passion then you snake my jean jacket AND my Van Halen parking lot t-shirt? WTF bitch?!

  35. Lady Gaga
    Commented on this photo:

    She said thanks, and managed a smile. But deep down, as Gaga made her way down the steps, she knew that wasn’t the envelope she wanted kissed.

  36. David Spade Panama Hat Sunglasses
    Commented on this photo:

    this guy has made me laugh a million times. he may be past his prime but I can’t not like him.

  37. January Jones Butt Tight Jeans LAX
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    She just discovered that you can be added to the no-fly list for sheer bitchiness.

  38. Tom Daley Speedo Diving Board
    Commented on this photo:

    So…the tunnel to heaven is in a British diver’s speedo?

  39. Jennifer Lopez Butt Glittery Bodysuit
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember back when we used to think J-Lo had a big ass? Sigh, we were all so much younger…more innocent in those days.

  40. Carla Gugino Cleavage Bra See Through Shirt
    Mark B
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ve always dug this chick since I first saw her as the mom on Spy Kids. Really pretty and tatas til Tuesday.

  41. Maria Shriver Cleavage
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    You can still see the wrinkles through the pants.

  42. Kim Kardashian Leather Miniskirt Kanye West Pink Sneakers
    Troll's Nighmare
    Commented on this photo:

    My brain just froze up. It’s jaded enough already to tolerate these two but those pink shoes put it over the limit.

  43. Kristina Rihanoff Breast Cancer Awareness Sports Bra Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Can we just admit that “breast cancer awareness” is a bullshit “not a real thing” event? It’s an excuse for narcissistic celebrities to be seen, and to be associated with something without actually doing anything, as well as an excuse for charities to collect fat amounts of cast and make it vanish.

    We’re all goddamn AWARE of breast cancer. Raise money to treat it, raise money to prevent it, raise money to detect it…pretending that you’re trying to make people “aware” is a steaming load of horse shit.

    • Sing it, brother. How many celebs are out there promoting lung cancer awareness? It kills three times as many people as breast cancer, but I guess lungs just aren’t as marketable as breasts. The fact is that the breast cancer awareness industry is a huge money machine that’s going to fight tooth and nail to stay in business.

    • Basically, you’re sounding off on Titty Gallery Central against an excuse for quasi-celebrities to show up and show off their tits. Am I reading that correctly?

    • I consider myself a professional at un-awarness and I know about breast cancer. I think it’s safe to say the information has penetrated deep into the dark corners of our society if I know about it.

      • we get it, susan g.

        They try to say this raising awareness thing is so we’ll remember to get mammograms. I think it’s just a celebration of cancer. An invitation for the cancer. We’re very fucking aware that we can get breast cancer. It’s been “a thing” for awhile now so how about we celebrate health instead and not use the word “cancer” at all? Oh, because nobody would make any money? Oh that’s right, how could I forget?

      • Do you think Cancer and Candyman are the same person?

      • The Susan G. Komen organization spends 34% of their annual budget on “awareness and education”, almost 5X what they spend on ACTUALLY TREATING PEOPLE WITH CANCER.

        I’m not going to say Komen is a bad egg…they’re not, but their priorities are right fucked up. Their single largest expenditure every year is holding these celebrity events for the pretty people to be seen and feel good about supporting a cause without actually having to do anything beyond attend a party.

    • Breast cancer is more detectable early than lung cancer. And breast cancer seems to have no one cause, while lung cancer is mainly smoking. Everyone knows smoking causes lung cancer, they just don’t care. That being said, I completely agree with the quasi-celebrity just wanting an excuse to show off their breasts thing. They don’t really care.

      If you really cared, you would raise money to bring mammograms into low-income areas where it would make a huge difference, not pose for pictures poitning at your breasts all day.

  44. David Spade Panama Hat Sunglasses
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    I am going to go out on a limb here and suggest that, at the moment this photo was taken, and the 6 months immediately preceding it, he wasn’t funny.

  45. Tom Daley Speedo Diving Board
    Commented on this photo:

    *Getting in the car*

  46. Tom Daley Speedo Diving Board
    Jay
    Commented on this photo:

    I always assumed that’s what Skarsgard’s would look like…

  47. Prince William Kate Middleton Atheletes In Sauna The Football Association's National Football Centre
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s an awful lot of carrots in that stew.

  48. Josh Brolin Oldboy Set
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice Stallone impression mixed with a little Jon Hamm.

  49. Kristina Rihanoff Breast Cancer Awareness Sports Bra Shorts
    1NDUN
    Commented on this photo:

    TTFN

  50. Maria Shriver Cleavage
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    So, how many things does she have keys to?

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