The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 10.8.13

October 8th, 2013 // 445 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed, your daily retreat from your conscience. A place where you’re free to make wild assumptions about celebrities based on a single awkwardly timed photograph. Gay sex, you’re almost certainly thinking! Or take this shot of Gerard Butler. Sure, gay sex probably works here too, but I know one of you out there has a port-a-potty/300 zinger ready to go. Then there’s Denise Richards having no choice but to play along and brush off the spiders before Charlie starts firing a gun at them, Heidi Klum with a penis-shaped object near her face and Joe Jonas wearing a shirt with words written on it, which is a great idea look for him that will in no way get twisted into misconceptions about the type of person he puts his penis in.

Extra homophobia, but no politics. Am I making progress? Discuss,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Avril Lavigne Huading Awards Ceremony
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    She knew something was wrong when they asked her what it was like being married to Tom Cruise but a free trip to whereverthefuck is a free trip to whereverthefuck.

  2. John Ratzenberger Google Glass An Evening Honoring James Burrows Academy Of Television Arts & Sciences
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s one way to get rid of the Borg. Send them Cliff Clavin.

  3. Melanie Griffith 11th Annual Best In Drag Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Anyone notice you never see her and John Malkovich in the same place?

  4. Gerard Butler Squatting Next To Bike
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    the first rule about poop club, is you don’t talk about poop club.

  5. Jada Pinkett Smith Shaved Head Willow Smith Hoodie Pulled Over Head LAX
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    My mom’s 70 and damn! The cherry on the sundae,man. The cherry on the sundae.

  6. Prince William The Football Association 150 Year Celebration Event
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    Damn! I can’t believe I missed this years Goosing O’ the Prince!

  7. Ireland Baldwin Cleavage Instagram
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    am i the only one picturing her doing an ill human beatbox?

  8. Tanjareen Martin Side Boob Cleavage Hollywood Black Film Festival Closing Night
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    Mandanglelow Johnson?

  9. Scarlett Johansson Falling Down Meme Jon Hamm Penis Jennifer Westfeldt
    Commented on this photo:

    Say, that ScarJo falling down meme sure got old fast, didn’t it?

  10. Corey Feldman Shauna Sand Hooker Bootsy Bellows
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t really have much to say about Corey”The Big Herp” Feldman but I think we found Waldo.

  11. Melanie Griffith 11th Annual Best In Drag Show
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    Antonio needs to stop downing handfuls of Viagra and move straight to Peyote. Geez.

  12. Michael Lohan Pushing Son In Stroller Talking On Cellphone
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    This is a Halloween prank right? Cuz that shit aint funny.

  13. Jennifer Lopez Butt Velour Dress HRC National Dinner
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like a big ol’ buffalo ass with one huge hind leg.

  14. Jennifer Lopez Butt Velour Dress HRC National Dinner
    Commented on this photo:

    Worst varicose veins I’ve ever seen.

  15. John Travolta Creepy Small Goatee Gray Streaked Long Hair Wig The Forger Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoever’s giving him a blowjob right now apparently has excellent technique.

  16. Joe Jonas Sorry Im A Stranger Here Myself Shirt
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    The shirt could have read: “Sorry I’m Strange”.

  17. Khloe Kardashian Huge Butt Tight Jeans
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor Lamar. Meth has shrunk him down to half his size. Wait, maybe my perspective is all wrong and he’s just standing next to Khloe.

  18. Carol Alt Butt Tight Dress Gray Line Ride Of Fame Event In Her Honor
    tlmck
    Commented on this photo:

    Assume the position.

  19. Chad Ochocinco Checking Out Womans Ass Overtown Set
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    Really? Even if it has a blue bagel tied to the top of it’s head? Really?

  20. Matthew Perry Huading Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t know his real name was “Murn Rx”.

  21. Anne Burrell Legs Short Shorts
    safety dancer
    Commented on this photo:

    If it’s possible to literally “cook your ass off” maybe Anne might think about heading down that route.

  22. Christopher Lambert 92nd Arc De Triomphe Race
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s a Neil Patrick Harris joke here somewhere, but I’m just not closing the gap.

  23. Christopher Lambert 92nd Arc De Triomphe Race
    Commented on this photo:

    So, there’s a “Falcon Crest” remake in progress?

  24. Quentin Tarantino Jeremy Irons Huading Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    “I wanted to tell you…I loved Die Hard 4!”
    “I was in Die Hard 3″
    That’s why I loved it!”

  25. Gerard Butler Squatting Next To Bike
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he making another Katherine Heigl movie?

  26. Anthony Mackie Jennifer Connelly Falling Down In The Rain Shelter Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Five minutes later, Anthony Mackie was in jail.

  27. Denise Richards Charlie Sheen Scratching Themselves Pumpkin Patch
    Commented on this photo:

    ” What was that thing you gave me the last time we had sex?”
    “…a kid?”
    “Yeah. You never apologized for that!”

  28. Nicole Scherzinger Butt Tight Dress Pride Of Britain Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Kudos to the nerd girl taking creeper shots of her ass.

  29. Anthony Weiner At Playground With Son
    Commented on this photo:

    She not falling for the ‘May I borrow your phone I need to make a phone call What penis picture?That must have always been there How dare you accuse me of such perversion unless you like what you see then text me at carlosdanger@weiner.com‘.

  30. Bar Refaeli Bikini Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    “Candy” Bar Refaeli. Yummy!

  31. Quentin Tarantino Jeremy Irons Huading Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    “I had mine capped back in ’99. Still look pretty good, don’t they?”

  32. Gerard Butler Squatting Next To Bike
    Commented on this photo:

    I see Gerard Butler’s finally agreed to reveal to the public his mother’s recipe for haggis.

  33. Ireland Baldwin Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    “BRAAAPP! Oh gawd I hate semen burps!”

  34. Olivier Martinez Huge Baguette Under Arm
    Commented on this photo:

    “I swear I am french! I lost my beret and my pencil mustache!
    Officer: “We believe you. Can we have your name for our records?”
    “Olivier Martinez….Please don’t send me to Mexico.”

  35. Anthony Mackie Jennifer Connelly Falling Down In The Rain Shelter Set
    Commented on this photo:

    “You think this move will get us first place on Dancing with the Stars?”

  36. Prince William The Football Association 150 Year Celebration Event
    Commented on this photo:

    “Come back here so I can have one of my servants kick your ass!”

  37. Nicole Scherzinger Butt Tight Dress Pride Of Britain Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I would applaud that ass except I’m too busy feeling my own and pretending it’s her.

  38. Harrison Ford Wetten Dass...? German TV Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “Now Mr. Ford, drunken patrons of Oktoberfest will pee on you while you hold this umbrella and perform ‘Singing in the Rain’.

  39. Anthony Weiner At Playground With Son
    Commented on this photo:

    When he applied for unemployment, for previous position, did he put “loser in mayoral race” or “phoneless perv”?

  40. Avril Lavigne Huading Awards Ceremony
    Commented on this photo:

    When these signs are translated into English, they all promise oral sex with the purchase of her newest album. The one on the far right says, “Flee Browjob.”

  41. Michael Lohan Pushing Son In Stroller Talking On Cellphone
    Commented on this photo:

    “I’m a piece of shit? You’re a piece of shit!” Go fuck myself? No! YOU! You go fuck yourself! Listen Lindsey, I have to go. We’ll pick this conversation up later.”

  42. Olivier Martinez Huge Baguette Under Arm
    Commented on this photo:

    “She just had the baby and I ran out of Viagra. I had to do sometheeng!”

  43. Jada Pinkett Smith Shaved Head Willow Smith Hoodie Pulled Over Head LAX
    Commented on this photo:

    Who is that small woman on Willow’s back?

  44. Prince William The Football Association 150 Year Celebration Event
    Commented on this photo:

    In unison…
    “Omigod, your breath smells like a dirty butt-crack…!!!”

  45. Scarlett Johansson Falling Down Meme Jon Hamm Penis Jennifer Westfeldt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Control your penis! It knocked that poor woman to the ground!”
    “It knows what it’s doing!”

  46. Peta Murgatroyd Ripped Abs Sports Bra DWTS Practice
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like they gave her back her car keys after this most recent suicide attempt…

  47. Harrison Ford Wetten Dass...? German TV Show
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    das ist good

  48. John Travolta Creepy Small Goatee Gray Streaked Long Hair Wig The Forger Set
    malaka
    Commented on this photo:

    like the faith + 1 album cover

  49. Harrison Ford Wetten Dass...? German TV Show
    Commented on this photo:

    “C’mon, man, I’ve had six steins of beer and I really need you to show me where the men’s room is.”

  50. Michael Lohan Pushing Son In Stroller Talking On Cellphone
    Commented on this photo:

    “I have to help him fill out the employment applications, fer fuck sake. It’s not like he can write yet…”

Leave A Comment