[Ed. Note: Short day today while we slowly rebuild the pieces of our lives i.e. return all these six packs to an acceptable drinking temperature. GODDAMN YOU, SANDY! WHERE'S YOUR SOUL?! Back tomorrow with a hopefully more robust line-up of famous people doing stupid and/or sexy shit. - SW]
Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which I fortunately didn’t have to compile from a rescue raft. Today’s gallery is a little light and leaned heavily on Britain’s Pride Awards, which apparently require crazy eyes and/or mostly exposed breasts to qualify for, so well done, old chaps. We’ve also got self-styled honorary Brit, Gwyneth Paltrow responding to the suggestion that they donate this food to the homeless, as well as Rosanna Arquette or a midnight shift Waffle House waitress (There’s really no way to tell the difference anymore.), and finally, two nice young gentleman helping this old lady who fell and couldn’t get up.
Today’s Final Five is not JWoww. Make that mistake and get cut, bitch,
- Photo Boy
Click Here To Start The Gallery
Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
Puerto Ricans even make going to the proctologist look like fun.
Fuck you asshole, she IS NOT Puertorican, she is Newyorican.
Says the Puerto Rican so proud of his heritage he thinks it’s all one word.
Oye pendejo, if her dad is PR, and her mom is PR, then she’s PR …newyorkrican is NOT a nationality
The Thing’s gonna be pissed when he hears Spider-man’s been puttin’ the moves on his girl!
In other news, a Bubble-forming super-massive black hole was found today.
No, seriously: http://www.thehindubusinessline.com/news/science/bubbleforming-supermassive-black-hole-found/article4046849.ece
Has been living in fear ever since Arnold told her he’d be back
Toby knows he’s not going back.
You know how they say all girls marry their fathers? Ashlee Simpson, meet Pete Wentz.
He kinda has more style than Pete
Big Bird has more style than Pete Wentz…
Third leg? Meet hand.
“So it turns out that when I thought I was asking whether this lacinato kale was curated by local artisans making a living wage, he thought I said SWISS CH — hold on, I can barely breathe — SWISS CHARD!”
hehehehehehehee
Grea$y
TITS!!!!!…who?
Blub and Blubber.
You actually believe I do this at home?! I haven’t laughed this hard since I received my complementary cleaning kit made from the tears of small children for my bald eagle hat and I got to fire my maid because she couldn’t open the box encoded to my fingerprint.
Uh, Will, it’s a cartoon. You didn’t actually have to dress like a Mario Brother!
They invite him onto the team and he steals the Thing’s girl!
Ordinarily I would be impressed that she re-uses clothes, but for god’s sake GET A NEW COSTUME!!
I was going to bring this up as well. When most people wear the same clothes every day, we call them homeless.
I thought she must be in graduate school.
k let me guess- u held the can of spray tan in ur right hand.
Nice! +1
BAHAHAHAHA
Pride of Britain… “I gots all me teefs fixed up, I did!”
the teets help too
“The fuck is holding onto my arm?” thought fat hispanic Orlando Bloom
Gross!!!
Now that she’s founded the “I Won’t Maid F#$%” foundation, she simply needs to get Arnold to join.
She has my wiener’s vote.
My first thought was: Charlie Sheen looks like shit.
Again!?
I’ll stick my peen in her ad lick her ass crack when she is done shitting. I would.
you know thats kesha, right?
Exactly
Jesus, she’s eating my soul!!! Someone, ANYONE! Make her stop!
For Halloween, I assume she just stays indoors.
Ah…a group Halloween costume…”Continental Drift!”
The previous night at Jennie Garth’s publicist’s office:
Publicist: “You see, Amanda Bynes did it and got back in the news! Do that!”
JG: “But didn’t her publicist drop her then?”
Publicst: *whistles innocently*
Is that a thong hanging out of her back pocket?
She may be ready for her close-up but we are not.
She could havbe picked a better lesbian fuckbuddy
Right now someone at Vivid is furiously typing away at “Indiana Jane and the Slutty Cowgirl”
The first one wasn’t bad.
It is to be noted that Emmanuelle Shreaky has a built-in Halloween name.
An American Tail 3: Fievel Goes Hamm
Her escort is reconsidering his fee schedule and thinking about requesting pictures before accepting a job.
So “John Cleese” is the hot costume this Halloween? Good to know.
Fast: those implants need to be in more movies instead of stuck doing voice work in Disney Channel shows
May I present to you: Miss Steamy Nicks!
Note to self: don’t take the blue pill.
Rubber wins!
Who’s a stupid hoe?
Fish, you no longer need to put the name next to the picture. We know who it is just from the bulk.
Somewhere in the world a commoner just died.
Must be nice to find that special someone who hasn’t seen Spider-Man 3.
“I haven’t laughed this hard since Apple mistook Armand de Brignac for Armand de Périgord!”
“The Moms Afternoon Tea Conversation About How To Stop Human Trafficking in West Hollywood”
Really?
This thing needs a prettier mom or a catchier name.
Also, what part is happening in West Hollywood—the tea or the trafficking (or both)?
So this was my first time in forever clicking through TCWM without a pop-up blocker… This site is goddamn near unusable without one. I know it’s pretty much unusable from the phone, but shit. FFS, fish.
No shit, man. It’s unbearable… I am extremely close to being to the point of never coming to this site again.
Just swallow, already.
haahahaha
Too much plastic surgery around the mouth (not well done) and cheek implants, gah.
This is one spitroast I don’t want to see happen.
1. Cut three holes out of table cloth.
2. Go to movie premiere.
3. ???
4. Profit.
The orange flip flops negate any street cred the shirt might have bestowed.
They were left over from “Men on Film.”
At least Penelope has a good corpse double.