The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 1.29.13

January 29th, 2013 // 388 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed brought to you not only by Kate Upton‘s, but also Kelly Brook‘s considerable uh, talents. They want you to buy things and you should, because their breasts asked nicely. And as if to completely negate those two perfect, bulging examples of capitalism in its finest moment, we’ve also got Brandi Glanville at her book signing. She titled it ‘Drinking & Tweeting and other Brandi Blunders’ so, you know what? Instead of continuing here, I’m just going to gaze at my state school diploma for a while and sob for humanity.

“Yes Dad, my advisor said there’s tons of career options for Communications majors.” *hangs up phone, heads to happy hour for 50 cent beers* - Photo Boy, circa 2001

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Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Dita Von Teese Mischa Barton Lambertz Monday Night
    Commented on this photo:

    In the background, you can clearly see E.T. finally phoning home.

  2. Prince Charles Circle Sports Visit
    Commented on this photo:

    You mean people actually have to pay for these things? Why don’t they just ask their mum for them?

  3. Katharine McPhee O Face Jack Davenport Smash Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Buttfucking in public, just like that huh?

  4. David Beckham Grabbing Butt Adidas Commercial
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, that ad says “shoes” to me!

  5. Kelly Brook Flight Attendant Sky Ad
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    She can use her born and raised flotation devices in case of an emergency.

  6. David Beckham Grabbing Butt Adidas Commercial
    Commented on this photo:

    “Don’t touch my balls…don’t touch my balls…”

  7. Anne Hathaway Legs Short Shorts Giant Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    That was one hell of a sale at Goodwill today, wasn’t it?

  8. Rita Ora Cleavage
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    The double G Cleft.

  9. Adrienne Bailon Side Boob HYPNOTIQ Valentines Day Cocktail Recipe Launch
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    Bottle-blocked?

  10. Edita Vilkeviciute Bikini Victorias Secret
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    Future mail order bride

  11. Kate Upton Cleavage Sam Edelman Shoes Ad
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Later tonight she’s going to complain that she doesn’t have any decent shoes to wear.

  12. Dita Von Teese Mischa Barton Lambertz Monday Night
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah, the mutual “Why did they sit me next to her?” look.

  13. Anne Hathaway Legs Short Shorts Giant Hat
    karlito
    Commented on this photo:

    looks like the top end of a giant condom got ripped off and she put it on her head.

  14. Jeremy Renner Hansel & Gretel: Witch Hunters Premiere Sydney
    zomgbie
    Commented on this photo:

    maybe she’s born with it.
    maybe it’s maybelline!

  15. Kelly Brook Flight Attendant Sky Ad
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I think they PhotoShopped her about 8 inches taller than she really is.

  16. Kelly Brook Flight Attendant Sky Ad
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Sure, we’ll crowd you onto a smelly, tiny, miserable plane just like everyone else–but we have a hot stewardess!!!

  17. Larry King Hugging Arsenio Hall Tongue Out NATPE
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    RuPaul finally showed up at something without fucking makeup on.

  18. Philip Seymour Hoffman
    Joe
    Commented on this photo:

    I used to shart. But then I was like, y’know, if you’re gonna do something you might as well just commit godamnit. So now, y’know, I just like, kinda, don’t even hold back. Go big or go home. right? I just let it go, y’know. It’s been very liberating. I haven’t used a toilet in 2 days, and I’ve, like, y’know gone when I needed to. So… yeah. It is what it is.

  19. Courtney Stodden Tight Shirt Twitter
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Yes, have some”

  20. Michael Imperioli Long Hair Scarf Retreat Screening 28th Santa Barbara International Film Festival
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder at what point between The Sopranos and this picture he started dropping the phrase “the craft” into every discussion?

  21. Brandi Glanville Cleavage Holding Drinking And Tweeting Book
    Commented on this photo:

    mmmmm..

  22. Kelly Brook Flight Attendant Sky Ad
    Commented on this photo:

    This photo is clearly shopped. No way those dudes are looking at a screen when SHE is right next to them.

  23. Courtney Stodden Tight Shirt Twitter
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I’ll bet she makes that husband get down on all fours and bark like a dog on a nightly basis.

  24. Anne Hathaway Legs Short Shorts Giant Hat
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Thinking to herself, “Aren’t I just delightful?”

  25. Kate Upton Cleavage Sam Edelman Shoes Ad
    THE REALIST1
    Commented on this photo:

    all SHIT shoes except the ones she is wearing

  26. Jaden Smith Gang Signs Bandana Balcony
    Commented on this photo:

    I love his syrup.

  27. Brandi Glanville Cleavage Holding Drinking And Tweeting Book
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    I actually find it very inspiring that an illiterate wrote a book. It’s kind of like when Helen Keller hired that helper to pretend to sign for her.

  28. Courtney Stodden Tight Shirt Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Still looks like a tranny.

  29. Kim Kardashian Yoga Pants Shirt Tied Around Waist
    Commented on this photo:

    “We’re gonna need a bigger jacket!”

  30. Prince Charles Circle Sports Visit
    Commented on this photo:

    “I Say! Did you hear Sir Calvin? He says the blacks are better at sport! Jolly good chap! Jolly good.”

  31. Kate Upton Cleavage Sam Edelman Shoes Ad
    BP
    Commented on this photo:

    Great Tits! Are those babies real?

  32. David Beckham Grabbing Butt Adidas Commercial
    Commented on this photo:

    That dude has an incredible body. No Homo.

  33. Prince Charles Circle Sports Visit
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    No really, you’re not going to believe this, but there are commoners in here who can read and write! They have those now!

  34. Bill Gates Headphones German Development Ministry
    Commented on this photo:

    “Smithers….have this man executed after this meeting.”

  35. David Beckham Grabbing Butt Adidas Commercial
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Skarsgard for the goal!!

  36. Anne Hathaway Legs Short Shorts Giant Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    “Mario, I’m a betting I can a hit that pale woman with this a here pizza crust ona the head! 1000 Lira”

    “Nota chance, Luigi. 2000 Lira! and youra on.”

  37. Philip Seymour Hoffman
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t want Meth, just give me a burger.

  38. Dita Von Teese Mischa Barton Lambertz Monday Night
    Commented on this photo:

    Something tells me Misha will not need much convincing from Dita before she’s munching her carpet.

  39. Simon Cowell Holding Cocaine Vial
    Commented on this photo:

    Now we know where he gets his unlimited confidence in his “skills”.

  40. Jaden Smith Gang Signs Bandana Balcony
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Flashin’ gang signs for all my homies at North Hollywood Prep, YEAAAAHHH!!!

  41. Larry King Hugging Arsenio Hall Tongue Out NATPE
    Commented on this photo:

    Old frog men are delicious!

  42. Hilaria Thomas Cellulite Mario Lopez Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh yeah. It’s in now.

  43. Kim Kardashian Yoga Pants Shirt Tied Around Waist
    Commented on this photo:

    “And she waddled away (waddle waddle) ’till the very next day bom bom ba badda bom bom…”

  44. Simon Cowell Holding Cocaine Vial
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy fuck, I didnt even see what he was holding until you guys pointed it out. I think I like him now.

  45. Philip Seymour Hoffman
    Commented on this photo:

    Gearing up for his Micheal Moore role…

  46. Philip Seymour Hoffman
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, at least there is one actor left who doesn’t let his publicist dress him every morning.

  47. Katharine McPhee O Face Jack Davenport Smash Set
    Commented on this photo:

    This is her “How I got famous” pose.

  48. Edita Vilkeviciute Bikini Victorias Secret
    Commented on this photo:

    “Honey, can you move to the left a bit? There’s a grain of sand blocking you.”

  49. Adrienne Bailon Side Boob HYPNOTIQ Valentines Day Cocktail Recipe Launch
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    And there is the weapon that let England so quickly conquer Scotland and Ireland.

  50. Rita Ora Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    I suppose this woman is the next “hit” to hit coming to a shitty gym music channel near you!

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