The Crap We Missed – Tuesday 1.15.13

January 15th, 2013 // 251 Comments

Welcome to Tuesday’s The Crap We Missed which seems a little light, but not when you consider the still rising paparazzi death toll from Alexander Skarsgard unleashing the Kraken. They found one poor bastard with shards of lens jutting from his aorta. Fortunately, the survivors, though forever marred with a penis-shaped burn across their faces, were able to bring us Jaimie Alexander who should have deleted that six weeks she worked for Merry Maids from her resume, Peter Stormare just wishing Richard Greico would say some shit, and finally, which of these two is more likely to blow you for half a bottle of Robitussin: Charlie Sheen or Bam Margera?

Trick question! The answer is Tom Cruise and actually, you can just keep the cough syrup,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Andrew Dice Clay Short Pants Grey Socks Fingerless Gloves
    Hank E. Ring
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet this guy gets all the ladies.

  2. Arnold Schwarzenegger Groping Jaimie Alexander The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Talk laundry and house chores to me, baybeee”

  3. Shakira Pregnant Belly Gerard Pique The Wind And Random Presentation
    Commented on this photo:

    Lady whispers: Unmarried slut…

  4. Peter Stormare Red Sungleasses Scarf The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Love this dude…

  5. Shakira Pregnant Belly Gerard Pique The Wind And Random Presentation
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh, gosh. They let one of those pregnant teens in here. Get a reality show, you little trollop!”

  6. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Position
    Buddy The Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    Extra Attention Starved.

  7. Amber Rose Pregnant Huge Butt See Through Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Wasn’t enough room to Bedazzle “CLASSY” on there.

  8. Bam Margera Zit The Last Stand Premiere
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “I made a career out of skateboarding, getting hit in the nuts, and abusing my parents. How did you THINK my face would end up? Clean shaven and dignified? BWAHAHA!”

  9. Charlie Sheen Drunk Drugs Smoking Cigarette The Late Show With David Letterman
    Commented on this photo:

    Eye shadow fail.

  10. Andrew Dice Clay Short Pants Grey Socks Fingerless Gloves
    Commented on this photo:

    HAHAHAHA.

    No chance I’m ruining this one with words.

  11. Charlie Sheen Drunk Drugs Smoking Cigarette The Late Show With David Letterman
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Jesus, I’m surrounded by pregnant women in this gallery!” *puts cigarette out in eyes* “Much better.”

  12. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Position
    Commented on this photo:

    Let me ass you a question.

  13. Bam Margera Zit The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    say what you will, but this is one guy i can imagine surviving the Apocalypse.

  14. Bam Margera Zit The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Nothing screams TALENT like wearing a shirt with your own name on it.

  15. Meagan Good Butt Yoga Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Meagan Meh.

  16. Chris Rock LAByrinth Theater Company Celebrity Charades 2013 Benefit Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like someone is gunning for Tyrone Biggum’s spot…

  17. Arnold Schwarzenegger Groping Jaimie Alexander The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Would you wear a hauskeepa uniform for mee?”

  18. Bruce Vilanch Penis T Shirt The 11th Annual Night Life Awards
    Kel
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet it is, Anjelica. I bet it is.

  19. Peter Stormare Red Sungleasses Scarf The Last Stand Premiere
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “You there! Can I interest you in some . . . Shit! I forgot to fill my jacket with drugs and guns!”

  20. Amber Rose Pregnant Huge Butt See Through Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    Snead O’Connor is looking rather thick.

  21. Peter Stormare Red Sungleasses Scarf The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    He believes in nothing.

  22. Maria Menounos Butt Yoga Position
    Commented on this photo:

    Sesame Street is brought to you by the letters “D” and “P”

  23. Arnold Schwarzenegger Groping Jaimie Alexander The Last Stand Premiere
    B&WMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    /r/inyourdreamsArnie

  24. Anjelica Houston
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    Was she Laverne or Shirley ?

  25. Charlie Sheen Drunk Drugs Smoking Cigarette The Late Show With David Letterman
    Commented on this photo:

    The Warlock looks like he’s been on a coke bender for a few days.

  26. Crispin Glover Long Hair
    ThisWillHurt
    Commented on this photo:

    “Did that person not compliment my toupee? Aw, a shame I have to kill them.”

  27. Arnold Schwarzenegger Groping Jaimie Alexander The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Cum with me if you want to…oops…too late. I’ll be back…after a 15 minute nap.”

  28. Crispin Glover Long Hair
    DeucePickle
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s strange that he’s not in the tabloids more. He’s ACTUALLY crazy

  29. Amber Rose Pregnant Huge Butt See Through Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet that gravy you won’t fucking put down is rich

  30. Peter Stormare Red Sungleasses Scarf The Last Stand Premiere
    Nonny Moose
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, man. You wanna buy a watch?

  31. Amber Rose Pregnant Huge Butt See Through Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    If she’s that rich, then why couldn’t she afford better looking panties?

  32. Charlie Sheen Drunk Drugs Smoking Cigarette The Late Show With David Letterman
    Commented on this photo:

    How has he not made a guest appearance on “Breaking Bad” yet?

  33. Crispin Glover Long Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    One has to ponder…
    did he turn out this way because he grew up named CRISPEN?

    Or did Mom and Dad just KNOW, and name him Crispen because of it.

  34. Judi Shekoni Side Boob Cleavage The Last Stand Premiere
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    Lovely brown loaves.

  35. Rihanna Underwear Complex Shoot Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Gotta laugh – not many more desperate and attention starved than she is, yet the best she can do is Chris Brown. And even then he appears to need a little something more on the side.

    Justice, I suppose.

    • DeucePickle

      You mean to tell me that a famous celebrity in Hollywood isn’t perfectly well adjusted? This girl that stands on stage in front of millions of people every year is attention starved? The one that gets the shit beat out of her and goes back to the guy? Yeah there’s something wrong with her alright. But that’s her appeal.

  36. Andrew Dice Clay Short Pants Grey Socks Fingerless Gloves
    Commented on this photo:

    The Dice Man wears a fanny pack, gets all the pussy.

  37. Andrew Dice Clay Short Pants Grey Socks Fingerless Gloves
    Commented on this photo:

    As big as he’s getting, they didn’t need to shorten “Brooklyn.”

  38. Bam Margera Zit The Last Stand Premiere
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t he get it on with Jessica Simpson before she discovered bacon?

  39. Judi Shekoni Side Boob Cleavage The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Obviously, Melissa Etheridge isn’t impressed.

  40. Anjelica Houston
    I'mCool
    Commented on this photo:

    I thought Joey Ramone was dead.

  41. Jennifer Love Hewitt Running Down Bleachers The Client List Set
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    Still bangable.

  42. Anjelica Houston
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s my favorite Muppet!

  43. Chris Rock LAByrinth Theater Company Celebrity Charades 2013 Benefit Gala
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like someone is gunning for Macaulay Culkin’s spot…

  44. Bam Margera Zit The Last Stand Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Imagine that….a douche in Hollywood wearing a beanie and a hoodie at the same time.

  45. Bruce Vilanch Penis T Shirt The 11th Annual Night Life Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Nobody suspected that when he took off those nerdy framed glasses, he was in reality, Superman!

  46. Crispin Glover Long Hair
    Nonny Moose
    Commented on this photo:

    Poor people are crazy. I’m eccentric.

  47. Andrew Dice Clay Short Pants Grey Socks Fingerless Gloves
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Did Sylvester Stallone fuck Russel Brand?

  48. Bam Margera Zit The Last Stand Premiere
    EricLR
    Commented on this photo:

    Wasn’t he the one in the car accident?

  49. Rihanna Underwear Complex Shoot Twitter
    Commented on this photo:

    Is she REALLY “Complex?” I’m thinking more “Easy.”

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