Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed brought to you by me, Photo Boy, thanks to the power of heavy rain and the rapidly dissolving infrastructure of Central PA’s power grid. Coincidentally we’ve also got celebs at the mercy of nature’s wrath so long as you count David Hasselhoff‘s recurrent alcoholism and whatever the hell is going on with Lacey Schwimmer‘s thyroid that’s making this happen. Also, Taylor Lautner shows a lucky fan exactly where they hook up the E-meter in Tom Cruise’s shaggin’ wagon while George Lopez and Justin Timberlake get into a little light ass-play. You know, for charity.
I salute the Union Jack in the only way I know how at the end (Erection jokes: count on ‘em.),
- Photo Boy
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Photo: Fame, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN
He cannot hide the disgust of having to stand beside a female and she cannot hide the fear of finding a 12″ dildo shoved up his butt.
Anderson Cooper: “Alpaca his fudge!”
“Please Lord, let these people continue to not get their shit together and wander around aimlessly so that my stocks are not affected in any way whatsoever”.
Why is she single?
You want 8 kids and a bitch like her??? Self explanatory.
I just wish I knew for sure which way the Wolverine swings.
He sings & dances and is impossibly chipper; how could he be straight?
He looks like my grandfather when he takes his teeth out.
THOSE CRAZY CHRISTIANS WERE RIGHT HOMOSEXUALITY DOES LEAD TO BESTIALITY.
Take off your headphones.
Kanye, did you mean to tweet this to Chris Brown?
Sorry, staring at the ass and my mind has completely gone blank!
I think she is having the same issue.
He’s still a thrill…
What are they looking at that’s causing such faces?
2 Girls 1 Cup. The live performance
After the Gay Matrix, Hoff got used to squirting while having something white in his mouth.
“Is that my career underneath the car?”
“No, honey, we lost that 1,000 miles ago.”
So she’s peddling lube now… and there’s a pink one and a brown one. Must have made it color coded she knows what one goes with what hole.
“Eddie, can you get me a ticket to the Oscars?”
“Get the fuck outta here bitch.”
What do celebrities usually do to hold onto any shred of fame? Oh, you could get a reality show! Oh wait, that was canceled, huh? Go on Dancing with the- wait, wait, already did that. Hmm, this is a puzzler…I hear drug OD’s are in.
Looks like he ripped one after downing a bag full of 5-layer burritos.
Haha, George! We think it, you do it!
What a perennial beauty!!
isn’t perineum just another word for your taint?
heheh
Wow. That is a lot of jizz.
She must have made a deal with Satan. Liz has slowed down the aging clock in some remarkable way.
Bedazzled was about that very premise.
why does the TSA allow his hair on a flight? definitely more hazardous than a box cutter.
I wonder how much she insured her boobs for? A case of Budweiser?
The silence of her recent career is deafining.
“Gas, ass or grass, nobody rides for free. You bunch of mediocre, snot-nose punks!”
It looks like the photo was snapped right before she let out a big “Fuck You!” and flipped off the cameraman.
OINK OINK!!
Is that Rob Lowe in the background? Oh shit, it is contagious!
LOL, that does kinda look like him, good catch.
“My Mom wanted to make Tina into a dress, but she relented once I renamed him Tony and took him home.
she still looks good to me.
“Here…let me move my hair so you can get a better look at my boobs.”
You throw away that soul this instant, missy! You know we don’t allow them in this family.
“Oh look a penis!”
“Everyone get in the van, now! You’re late for sweatshop duty- I mean, Economics Club!”
shootin the bird incognito style
So this season DWTS is featuring all the gutter trash that washed up over the last year?
Oh look, she finally got breast implants!
I can’t remember what all of you guys look like. Look, I’m need to see a picture I.D. Octomom is NOT gonna pawn off any of her brats on me. I’ve already got too many of them myself.
You No come hewre any ronger! For bun rieu?? No way. No bun bo hue.
Is that a marshmallow in his mouth?
Raise your hand if you played Pudgy Bunny.
I used to be in love with this chick. Hope it’s not a health issue with the weight (ehh pun intended), and if it is…hope it’s fixed soon.
I’m pretty sure her issue is called the KFC Double Down.
She has endometriosis and takes meds for that. The meds cause weight gain.
I’ll be damned… it’s true!
Great, Justin goes and brings sexy back, and now a Mexican is trying to take it away.
Zut Alors, he is a gay.
Only in Scotland will they deep fry your dentures
Seen: Hasselhoff slinging a bottle of his own urine at someone.
Not seen: Kim Kardashian in the audience, front row center.
“NO! You will not attend college! College is for the mediocre. Now go dance for the cameras so mommy can buy a new car!”
Now that he is unemployed, he is just doing what Mexicans do best….
:)
A “model”, how typical.
Words cannot express how much I love that ass.
“They won’t believe this back in the Pampas”
“Whew, still 2% body fat. I’ll be okay when this show gets cancelled next week.”