The Crap We Missed – Thursday 9.29.11

September 29th, 2011 // 395 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed brought to you by me, Photo Boy, thanks to the power of heavy rain and the rapidly dissolving infrastructure of Central PA’s power grid. Coincidentally we’ve also got celebs at the mercy of nature’s wrath so long as you count David Hasselhoff‘s recurrent alcoholism and whatever the hell is going on with Lacey Schwimmer‘s thyroid that’s making this happen. Also, Taylor Lautner shows a lucky fan exactly where they hook up the E-meter in Tom Cruise’s shaggin’ wagon while George Lopez and Justin Timberlake get into a little light ass-play. You know, for charity.

I salute the Union Jack in the only way I know how at the end (Erection jokes: count on ‘em.),

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Taylor Lautner
    Commented on this photo:

    He cannot hide the disgust of having to stand beside a female and she cannot hide the fear of finding a 12″ dildo shoved up his butt.

  2. Anderson Cooper Llama
    Willie Dixon
    Commented on this photo:

    Anderson Cooper: “Alpaca his fudge!”

  3. Russell Simmons Meditates Occupy Wall Street
    fattymcgee
    Commented on this photo:

    “Please Lord, let these people continue to not get their shit together and wander around aimlessly so that my stocks are not affected in any way whatsoever”.

  4. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    guy rossi
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is she single?

  5. Hugh Jackman Swimming
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I just wish I knew for sure which way the Wolverine swings.
    He sings & dances and is impossibly chipper; how could he be straight?

  6. Michael Douglas Hot Dog
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks like my grandfather when he takes his teeth out.

  7. Anderson Cooper Llama
    NEXUS INVICTO
    Commented on this photo:

    THOSE CRAZY CHRISTIANS WERE RIGHT HOMOSEXUALITY DOES LEAD TO BESTIALITY.

  8. Minka Kelly Butt Tight Jeans Charlies Angels
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry, staring at the ass and my mind has completely gone blank!

  9. Robert Downey Jr
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s still a thrill…

  10. Gerard Butler
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    What are they looking at that’s causing such faces?

  11. David Hasselhoff Water Bottle
    Willie Dixon
    Commented on this photo:

    After the Gay Matrix, Hoff got used to squirting while having something white in his mouth.

  12. Kirsten Dunst Cleavage See Through Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    “Is that my career underneath the car?”

  13. Kendra Wilkinson Cleavage Ab Cuts
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    So she’s peddling lube now… and there’s a pink one and a brown one. Must have made it color coded she knows what one goes with what hole.

  14. Eddie Murphy
    Tracey
    Commented on this photo:

    “Eddie, can you get me a ticket to the Oscars?”
    “Get the fuck outta here bitch.”

  15. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    sad panda
    Commented on this photo:

    What do celebrities usually do to hold onto any shred of fame? Oh, you could get a reality show! Oh wait, that was canceled, huh? Go on Dancing with the- wait, wait, already did that. Hmm, this is a puzzler…I hear drug OD’s are in.

  16. Hugh Jackman Swimming
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like he ripped one after downing a bag full of 5-layer burritos.

  17. George Lopez Justin Timberlake Ass Grab
    sad panda
    Commented on this photo:

    Haha, George! We think it, you do it!

  18. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage
    My Left Nut
    Commented on this photo:

    What a perennial beauty!!

  19. Hugh Jackman Swimming
    fattymcgee
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow. That is a lot of jizz.

  20. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    She must have made a deal with Satan. Liz has slowed down the aging clock in some remarkable way.

  21. Taylor Lautner
    whiskeyafternoon
    Commented on this photo:

    why does the TSA allow his hair on a flight? definitely more hazardous than a box cutter.

  22. Kendra Wilkinson Cleavage Ab Cuts
    Commented on this photo:

    I wonder how much she insured her boobs for? A case of Budweiser?

  23. Gwen Stefani Cleavage
    My Left Nut
    Commented on this photo:

    The silence of her recent career is deafining.

  24. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    HumpinFrog
    Commented on this photo:

    “Gas, ass or grass, nobody rides for free. You bunch of mediocre, snot-nose punks!”

  25. Gwen Stefani Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    It looks like the photo was snapped right before she let out a big “Fuck You!” and flipped off the cameraman.

  26. Nancy Grace
    My Left Nut
    Commented on this photo:

    OINK OINK!!

  27. Gerard Butler
    sad panda
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that Rob Lowe in the background? Oh shit, it is contagious!

  28. Anderson Cooper Llama
    Tracey
    Commented on this photo:

    “My Mom wanted to make Tina into a dress, but she relented once I renamed him Tony and took him home.

  29. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    she still looks good to me.

  30. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    “Here…let me move my hair so you can get a better look at my boobs.”

  31. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    You throw away that soul this instant, missy! You know we don’t allow them in this family.

  32. Kirsten Dunst Cleavage See Through Dress
    Tracey
    Commented on this photo:

    “Oh look a penis!”

  33. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Everyone get in the van, now! You’re late for sweatshop duty- I mean, Economics Club!”

  34. Lacey Schwimmer No Pants
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    shootin the bird incognito style

  35. Lacey Schwimmer No Pants
    Commented on this photo:

    So this season DWTS is featuring all the gutter trash that washed up over the last year?

  36. Gwen Stefani Cleavage
    bonerspunk
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh look, she finally got breast implants!

  37. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t remember what all of you guys look like. Look, I’m need to see a picture I.D. Octomom is NOT gonna pawn off any of her brats on me. I’ve already got too many of them myself.

  38. Dang Cat

    You No come hewre any ronger! For bun rieu?? No way. No bun bo hue.

  39. David Hasselhoff Water Bottle
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a marshmallow in his mouth?

    Raise your hand if you played Pudgy Bunny.

  40. Lacey Schwimmer No Pants
    OnTheRealThough
    Commented on this photo:

    I used to be in love with this chick. Hope it’s not a health issue with the weight (ehh pun intended), and if it is…hope it’s fixed soon.

  41. George Lopez Justin Timberlake Ass Grab
    swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    Great, Justin goes and brings sexy back, and now a Mexican is trying to take it away.

  42. Taylor Lautner
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Zut Alors, he is a gay.

  43. Michael Douglas Hot Dog
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    Only in Scotland will they deep fry your dentures

  44. David Hasselhoff Water Bottle
    Commented on this photo:

    Seen: Hasselhoff slinging a bottle of his own urine at someone.

    Not seen: Kim Kardashian in the audience, front row center.

  45. Kate Gosselin Yelling At Kids
    Elle
    Commented on this photo:

    “NO! You will not attend college! College is for the mediocre. Now go dance for the cameras so mommy can buy a new car!”

  46. George Lopez Justin Timberlake Ass Grab
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Now that he is unemployed, he is just doing what Mexicans do best….

    :)

  47. Eddie Murphy
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    A “model”, how typical.

  48. Minka Kelly Butt Tight Jeans Charlies Angels
    Venom
    Commented on this photo:

    Words cannot express how much I love that ass.

  49. Anderson Cooper Llama
    BlackAndWhiteMinstrel
    Commented on this photo:

    “They won’t believe this back in the Pampas”

  50. Minka Kelly Butt Tight Jeans Charlies Angels
    swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Whew, still 2% body fat. I’ll be okay when this show gets cancelled next week.”

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