The Crap We Missed – Thursday 8.18.11

August 18th, 2011 // 350 Comments

“If Tom says this is Suri, then this is Suri. Hello, Suri, how are you today? What’s that? Daddy’s re-educating the real you? Hahaha! Silly goose.”

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Halle Berry about to break her foot off in the paparazzi’s ass (If you notice she’s not wearing the proper footwear, you’re doing it wrong.), how I want from my coffee from now on and Blake Lively confusing me for a rearview mirror which happens way often than you’d think. I’m very reflective.

Is Akon officially white now? Can we get a ruling on that?

- The Superficial

The Crap We Missed

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Prince Charles
    Commented on this photo:

    British victims are eerily cheerful.

  2. Crystal Harris Jordon McGraw
    Star Droppings
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s the face of someone who has just had young, supple balls on her chin for the very first time.

  3. Reese Witherspoon
    MammaMia
    Commented on this photo:

    for once her chin isn’t dominating the picture….

  4. thebrideoffrankeberry

    Her body parts are all misproportioned. Hips from an old russian woman, tree trunk legs from a bulgravian lumberjack, old man hands, fried egg breasts, and those awful scientology zombie eyes.

  5. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    Manowl
    Commented on this photo:

    Him, Gerard Butler and Shia Lebeuf are doing “The three Stooges, the schizo hobo version”

  6. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    TyroneBiggums
    Commented on this photo:

    In every picture, there is a black man, saying it all with his erection.

  7. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    Rough, license to ill
    Commented on this photo:

    Im not following Forrest Whitaker, Lacey.

  8. Cat Deely Samsung Galaxy
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    If I was her pool boy, I would crawl on my hands and knees and just stick my tongue out and move up and down while I made that robotic voice noise you make into a fan.

  9. Akon Segway
    Rough, license to ill
    Commented on this photo:

    I know he’s gathering a flock but it’s out of frame. Worst photography ever. You’re suppose to tell a story when you take a pic, especially when it’s going to get on a celeb site. It is now written.

  10. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Shorty80
    Commented on this photo:

    You want me to get back in this car and run you down? ‘Cuz I’m good at that, muthafucka.

  11. catapostrophe

    She’s counting down the days till Contract Expiration Day. “Yay!” she’s thinking she’ll say when that day comes.

  12. David Arquette
    teehee
    Commented on this photo:

    He is not aging well. Get thee to a surgeon.

  13. Prince Charles
    Commented on this photo:

    You missed a word. Recent “race” riots… It is all poor “disenfranchised” ethnic groups… Wah wah wah wah…. Fuck the lot of them!!

  14. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    I have no idea where to put the emphasis in that name…

  15. Crystal Harris Jordon McGraw
    Steelerchick
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh look mommy is teaching her son how to drive

  16. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Steelerchick
    Commented on this photo:

    The kid just flipped the camera guy the bird!!

  17. Christopher Mintz-Plasse
    Frunken
    Commented on this photo:

    Pretty sure Fish could start making up names to give this guy whenever he’s posted, knowing none of us have a clue until we scroll down and see someone make a Mclovin joke.

  18. Jennifer Morrison Butt Tight Jeans
    John
    Commented on this photo:

    Great assets…

  19. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Coco
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t believe I’m look at anything other than her, but is that guy wearing a half shirt?

  20. Reese Witherspoon
    Coco
    Commented on this photo:

    She should make that expression all the time. Her chin looks much more proportionate now.

  21. David Arquette
    Coco
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s entering his Crispin Glover phase.

  22. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    Coco
    Commented on this photo:

    I can almost hear his ACL popping.

  23. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    Coco
    Commented on this photo:

    Is he making fun of Jennifer Love Hewitt with that outfit?

  24. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Studley Hungwell
    Commented on this photo:

    When did she start dating Chris Brown?

  25. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Studley Hungwell
    Commented on this photo:

    ‘Cept for having more hair on her chest than I do, she’s pretty hot

  26. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Studley Hungwell
    Commented on this photo:

    In every pic, there’s a fat chick with a camera, saying it all with her tooth…

  27. Salma Hayek Wig
    Kevin Cease
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet people would have sex with her.

  28. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m sorry Mr Akon, but we’re revoking your black card.

  29. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    ManFromNOLa
    Commented on this photo:

    Randy Quaid is looking better!

  30. Blake Lively Nipples No Bra
    Commented on this photo:

    I say whip it. Whip it gooooood*

  31. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    Commented on this photo:

    Are we sure it’s not Jennifer Love Hewitt in a blonde wig?

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