The Crap We Missed – Thursday 8.18.11

August 18th, 2011 // 350 Comments

“If Tom says this is Suri, then this is Suri. Hello, Suri, how are you today? What’s that? Daddy’s re-educating the real you? Hahaha! Silly goose.”

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed featuring Halle Berry about to break her foot off in the paparazzi’s ass (If you notice she’s not wearing the proper footwear, you’re doing it wrong.), how I want from my coffee from now on and Blake Lively confusing me for a rearview mirror which happens way often than you’d think. I’m very reflective.

Is Akon officially white now? Can we get a ruling on that?

- The Superficial

The Crap We Missed

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame, Flynet, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. David Arquette
    Commented on this photo:

    I didn’t recognize him not dressed like a circus clown.

  2. David Arquette
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    Overheard to the left: “There’s someone taking pictures over there. Guard your cooch.”

  3. Katie Price
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    Hopefully one day she’ll have another daughter named Fluffy.

  4. Christopher Mintz-Plasse
    Satan's bitch
    Commented on this photo:

    Mintz-Plasse… Isn’t that a dance move?

  5. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    Commented on this photo:

    turn his head upside down and he’d look exactly the same.

  6. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    sexyman48
    Commented on this photo:

    Christ they steal anything not bolted down.

  7. David Arquette
    Tracey
    Commented on this photo:

    …and then she left me.. I am so sad…I know she’s old…she left me…..I got in a car wreck…. gave me a nosebleed….I am so sad… did I mention she left me? … like my tie?

  8. Katie Price
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that a mustache?

  9. Christopher Mintz-Plasse
    Commented on this photo:

    Potsie!

  10. Crystal Harris Jordon McGraw
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    Doesn’t her bumping nasties with Hef ever discourage anyone? Gads!

    • Fletch

      Not people in Hollyweird. And we’re also talking Dr. Phil’s son; needs no explanation.

    • Richard McBeef

      I dunno, I bet she would treat me as some sort of sex god after years of being prodded with a semi hard liver spotted dick.

  11. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    Michael D
    Commented on this photo:

    This pic is begging to be posted up on Friend Zone Fiona
    http://www.quickmeme.com/Friend-Zone-Fiona/

    • Arzach

      LOL , poor bastard, been on Bar’s “Friend Zone” has to be worst than hell, and it will give you the bluest balls of them all

  12. Akon Segway
    Aaron
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet he just had sex.

  13. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    TomFrank
    Commented on this photo:

    …and that makes five. There’s one more pic to go? Uh oh.

  14. Lacey Schwimmer Kyle Massey
    Commented on this photo:

    I seriously thought that was Gary Coleman. Only taller.

  15. Katie Holmes
    Commented on this photo:

    Little Tom grew his hair out?

  16. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    The rims on that ride suck. Sucka.

  17. Prince Harry
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s laughing because people still think pippa’s ass is nice.

  18. Brad Garrett
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope he’s going to LA to do some more of those idiotic 7UP commercials. What a disaster.

  19. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    Someone pay that kid to pull mom’s shirt down a little more.

  20. David Arquette
    Commented on this photo:

    Why is this drunk asshole in the way of the hot chicks in back?

  21. Salma Hayek Wig
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    The disguise is working…

  22. David Arquette
    dontlooknow
    Commented on this photo:

    At a basement make-out party from 8th grade…

  23. Cat Deely Samsung Galaxy
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s pretty shitty deck furniture. Damn, not even a table. Bitch must have blown all her money on high heels and Samsungs.

    • Richard McBeef

      at least it’s environmentally friendly deck furniture. That chair is made out of recycled stripper shoes.

  24. Jennifer Morrison Butt Tight Jeans
    Aaron
    Commented on this photo:

    That body paints look so realistic!

  25. Jennifer Morrison Butt Tight Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t know who this is, but now I will recognize her anywhere.

  26. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    “Take that, Weird Al!”

  27. Prince Charles
    Commented on this photo:

    How’d Whoopi sneak in?

  28. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Get your tits out!

  29. Imogen Thomas Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    In every picture there are Siamese twins in the background trying to walk away from each other.

  30. Prince Charles
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    He got see and touch his first black person on the same day.

    • Fester

      Charles: (whispering) “I know you don’t think you’re good enough for me but trust me, you are. Hell, I”ve done it with pigs… REAL honest to god pigs.”

  31. Blake Lively Nipples No Bra
    Richard McBeef
    Commented on this photo:

    She would permanently walk around like that after I was done with her.

  32. Reese Witherspoon
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess she’s not pregnant anymore.

  33. Akon Segway
    Wotwot
    Commented on this photo:

    They see me rollin, they hatin.

  34. Akon Segway
    Commented on this photo:

    You look like a total asshole riding one but that sh*t is fun!

  35. Brad Garrett
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    His “Kids Say Stupid Shit” show must have tanked. I predict he’s a future Celebrity Rehabber.

  36. Salma Hayek Wig
    hbw
    Commented on this photo:

    If she wants extra cream, I’ll give it to her.

  37. Bar Refaeli Bikini
    hbw
    Commented on this photo:

    Fisting: You’re doing it wrong.

  38. Halle Berry Cleavage
    Colin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Yeah, my tit’s half out! Whatchu gonna do about it? Huh? HUH!?”

  39. Halle Berry Cleavage
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    That kid looks like she’s about to fucking attack!

  40. Blake Lively Nipples No Bra
    The Brown Streak
    Commented on this photo:

    oh my god, blake lively just gave birth to a 6 lb 4 oz dog

  41. Sinclair

    I’ve said it countless times before. Cruise has completely fucked up this poor girl (Katie). The sooner she escapes the better

  42. Prince Harry
    Commented on this photo:

    I just had my minimum RDA of Princess butt.

  43. Prince Harry
    The Brown Streak
    Commented on this photo:

    Didn’t Ndamukong Suh try to rip his head off last week?

  44. Reese Witherspoon
    Commented on this photo:

    Her chins’ enormous mass is creating a black hole and starting to suck her entire face into itself

  45. Katie Price
    The Brown Streak
    Commented on this photo:

    Why stop now? I see mommy sucking on daddy’s thumb all the time.

  46. I guess that’s Suris bigger sister. also she’s playing with dolls.

  47. Clarence Beeks

    InStyle Magazine just called this woman a fashion icon.

    She has terrible taste in clothes and really bad legs. Katie, wear some pants.

    • gumption

      true on the legs. But she is pretty and looks like she is 25 and is actually 32. Maybe this scientology bullshit is actually good for your appearance, all the fresh food eating and avoiding drugs, this shit is better than botox.

  48. Crystal Harris Jordon McGraw
    The Brown Streak
    Commented on this photo:

    Okay, who the fuck is Crystal Harris and why the fuck is she not in my pants?

  49. Jude Law Scruffy Beard
    PoorMaryKelly
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s a pretty painful looking camel toe he’s got there.

  50. Reese Witherspoon
    The Brown Streak
    Commented on this photo:

    How many times do I have to say…NOT IN THE EYE!

Leave A Comment