The Crap We Missed – Thursday 8.16.12

August 16th, 2012 // 546 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed, where it turns out Molly Ringwald has been a porno librarian this whole time, we begin casting for A Lindsay Lohan Carol, set at Chateau Marmont, with Janice Dickinson as The Ghost of Cocaine Future, and how the hell can Tom Sizemore still afford blow when he has to keep buying a new one of these for every red carpet appearance? Oh right, murder. I forgot that nobody cares when you murder prostitutes instead of paying them.

I don’t know who Jennifer Hawkins is, or why she has nine hip bones, but I approve,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. Sylvester Stallone Chuck Norris Whispering Secrets The Expendables 2 Premiere
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Where can a brother get some Ensure® around this place?

  2. Molly Ringwald Glasses Legs Book Reading
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    The “it” being menopause.

  3. Nicki Minaj Nipples Cleavage
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet she couldn’t even read the English translation of what’s on her arm.

  4. Matthew McConaughey Medicine Ball Workout
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    I bet he could look laid-back even if he was being waterboarded.

  5. Taryn Manning Skinny Legs Short Shorts
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    No, no, don’t dress up. Just whatever you happen to be wearing when you fall out of bed will be fine.

  6. Joey Lawrence Tight V Neck Shirt
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    No one has the heart to tell him that he was a cute kid actor in the 80′s–not an action star.

  7. Tom Sizemore Date Cleavage The Expendables 2 Premiere
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Why do I suddenly want to start singing that damned “Beauty and the Beast” song?

  8. Gene Simmons
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Lamest.comic.ever

  9. Kathleen Turner
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    So, then I tell Solo that I’m sending him and his punk bitch friend to the Sarlacc…

  10. Julia Stiles
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like she’s headed back to the African village.

  11. Jennifer Hawkins Bikini
    Persistent Cat
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks so worn.

  12. Janice Dickinson Cleavage Drunk
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    Wouldn’t you just love to live the glamorous life of a staffmember at the Chateau Marmont? Every five minutes you get the call to either clean up the vomit of some washed-up celeb or call an ambulance for yet another OD. Living the Hollywood dream!

  13. Sarah Jessica Parker
    EricLr
    Commented on this photo:

    The paparazzi lured her out with oats.

  14. Tulisa Contostavlos Butt Spandex Dress
    HollyK
    Commented on this photo:

    That is the longest ass crack I have ever seen.

  15. Tom Sizemore Date Cleavage The Expendables 2 Premiere
    HollyK
    Commented on this photo:

    That poor girl is thinking “fuck…..this is not what I anticipated when Uncle Tom invited me to dinner. “

  16. Joey Lawrence Tight V Neck Shirt
    Joaquin ingles
    Commented on this photo:

    And here we all thought he was a complete twit years ago…

  17. Sarah Jessica Parker
    Charlie Kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s time to call the glue factory.

  18. Edie Falco Hailing Cab
    Charlie Kirby
    Commented on this photo:

    This season, on THE WALKING DEAD…

  19. Amy Childs Cleavage Fragrance Launch
    Commented on this photo:

    When I saw this picture, I thought Aubrey O’Day got everything fixed in one swoop. Then I realized I was looking at someone even less famous.

  20. Tracy Morgan Belly Megan Wollover
    killer.lizz
    Commented on this photo:

    what is it with this guy and showing off his booze-baby bump? he’s like 13 months pregnant at this point

  21. Charisma Carpenter Cleavage The Expendables 2
    Commented on this photo:

    Great dress.

  22. Kathleen Turner
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Meat Loaf has evidently had some work done.

  23. Joey Lawrence Tight V Neck Shirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Roidy Lawrence.

  24. Julia Stiles
    Commented on this photo:

    The paparazzi guy thought that was Alec Baldwin behind her and was bummed when he tipped his camera forward and saw this on the screen. Then he sold the picture to cover the cost his grande caramel machiato.

  25. Sarah Jessica Parker
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s finally leaving the Sarah Jessica Porker nickname in the dust.

  26. Amy Childs Cleavage Fragrance Launch
    FLanlManl
    Commented on this photo:

    Ugly mouth- uck. She looks like she would look better without whatever she had done.

  27. Amy Childs Cleavage Fragrance Launch
    Jack Ketch
    Commented on this photo:

    Real eyeballs, everything else fake … the lips, the tits, the cheekbones. The IQ of a mushroom ?

  28. Kathleen Turner
    bigalkie
    Commented on this photo:

    My lawyers are suing Dreamwoks. After all, Helen Keller knows that I was the inspiration for Shrek.

  29. Matthew McConaughey Medicine Ball Workout
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    Before I scrolled down, I thought he was playing them bongos again.

  30. Sylvester Stallone Chuck Norris Whispering Secrets The Expendables 2 Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “My tears could have brought your son back to life, but you didn’t call me quickly enough. Sorry for your loss, Sly.”

  31. Matthew McConaughey Medicine Ball Workout
    Commented on this photo:

    “Rubber … ball …. is ….. heavy ….”

  32. Jennifer Hawkins Bikini
    Evangelista
    Commented on this photo:

    Honestly, TOO skinny!!!

  33. Sylvester Stallone Chuck Norris Whispering Secrets The Expendables 2 Premiere
    Ass Wort
    Commented on this photo:

    Legends!

  34. Nicki Minaj Nipples Cleavage
    Ass Wort
    Commented on this photo:

    What a disgusting individual.

  35. Joey Lawrence Tight V Neck Shirt
    Ass Wort
    Commented on this photo:

    Give it up bozo

  36. Edie Falco Hailing Cab
    journalschism
    Commented on this photo:

    “Here’s my ‘black man trying to get a cab in New York’ impression. And they never stop, it’s uncanny!”

  37. Gene Simmons
    Shitz
    Commented on this photo:

    “Wha happened???”

  38. Molly Ringwald Glasses Legs Book Reading
    Commented on this photo:

    We saw her in London starring in When Harry met Sally. It was so boring that I fell asleep. I wonder if she’s putting her book audience to sleep, too.

  39. Nicki Minaj Nipples Cleavage
    Commented on this photo:

    GIRL, did you realize you showed up with mah man? Bitch, I’m gonna beat yo ass.

  40. Matthew McConaughey Medicine Ball Workout
    Commented on this photo:

    Anybody up for a game of Nerd Ball?

  41. Kathleen Turner
    Commented on this photo:

    The sex change hormone shots are working for you, Kathleen.

  42. Claudia Romani Butt Bikini
    mean_gurl
    Commented on this photo:

    I would stomp on kittens to look like that!

  43. Tulisa Contostavlos Butt Spandex Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    Ew, the thumbnail made her look like that Real Housewife, Zolciak! Rethink your look, honey.

  44. Kelly Brook Butt Side Boob Tight Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    They’re Samesung now. Since they bought the E in GE.

  45. Matthew McConaughey Medicine Ball Workout
    Double D
    Commented on this photo:

    “Ahl-rite! Ahl-rite! So we were filming Magic Mike, alh-right. And the way Chan-man was dancing, I just had to grab his junk, ahl-right. And hand to God, the dude had one ball. Not two. One biggun, just like this, ahl-right. And I said, ‘Chan! The way I count, that done makes you a chick!’ Ahl-rite!”

  46. Matthew McConaughey Medicine Ball Workout
    JungleRed
    Commented on this photo:

    “I miss you, Lance.”

  47. Tulisa Contostavlos Butt Spandex Dress
    Cookie
    Commented on this photo:

    I find her much prettier w/ the black hair!

  48. Kelly Brook Butt Side Boob Tight Dress
    Cookie
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s so beautiful…nuff said!

  49. Joey Lawrence Tight V Neck Shirt
    Sue
    Commented on this photo:

    why is Mr Peanut on his shirt? Is he trying to tell us he has tiny testicles? I think we can tell my the tightness of his pants.

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