The Crap We Missed – Thursday 7.3.14

July 3rd, 2014 // 434 Comments

Alright everybody, it’s your last The Crap We Missed before we celebrate America’s birthday by passing out drunk on top of the grill before the escorts even get there. What, you don’t like to barbeque? So, I managed to put together another hearty selection of essentially innocent celebrity candids for us all to project shameful, humiliating and albeit completely untrue scenarios onto. Yay, Internets! With that in mind, here’s back-to-back Kelly Brook shots that I almost felt guilty about until I remembered my soul died circa 1993, Lily Allen‘s stomach because see previous and the inevitable outcome of all that Jersey Shore bullshit that we waited patiently for.

They actually look so depressed they might kill themselves! Happy Fourth of July Everyone!!

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Josh Duhamel Pushups On Guardrail
    Commented on this photo:

    When you are married to a man, I guess you are allowed to do girl push-ups.

  2. Kelly Brook Legs Buttcheeks Denim Romper
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    We CAN rebuild her. We have the technology…

  3. Renee Somerfield Naked Body Paint PETA Ad
    Commented on this photo:

    When will people realise that if you actually want to help animals and the planet, PETA are the LAST fuckers you should be supporting?

  4. Khloe Kardashian Fat Brother Rob Kardashian Body Pillow Instagram
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    Aw, how adorable, they’re napping inside one of Kris’s tentacles.

  5. Pregnant Snooki And JWoww Miserable Roger Matthews And Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck the whole lot of them. I’d still fuck Snooki though. I know. I have a problem.

    • But if you do her as she appears in this picture you also get to claim to have done the entire cast of The Flintstones – all at once!

  6. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Minidress Talking To Guy In Wheelchair
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Hey Taylor! How ya doing? Tell Satan at your monthly confab that I’m ready to give my soul to walk again. Hail the Prince of Evil, and catch ya later!”

  7. Usher Peace Sign
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    “Usher, how many seconds did you mull it over about unleashing Justin Bieber on an unsuspecting world?”

  8. Hilary Clinton Crazy Eyes Mouth Open Book Signing
    Commented on this photo:

    “Have you seen Sharon Stone on the Superficial lately? I think you are hotter than her now.”
    “NO SHIT, HUH!!!”

  9. Prince William Holding Stomach Kate Middleton Holding Nose Wimbledon
    fred
    Commented on this photo:

    “Somebody somewhere is sick of her shit, they said. Everybody turns into a Camilla eventually, they said. Piss on me for not listening.”

  10. Amber Rose Huge Ass Spandex Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    ? Does she just stand there, frozen, pretending to get into SUV’s all day? I swear that’s the only pose I have ever seen from her.

  11. Melissa McCarthy Hand And Footprint Ceremony TCL Chinese Theatre
    Commented on this photo:

    Why would she willingly dress like the girl who ate the candy and turned into a giant blueberry in Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory?

  12. Pregnant Snooki And JWoww Miserable Roger Matthews And Jionni LaValle
    Schadenfreude
    Commented on this photo:

    Look,paper covers scissors so I win! You carry the kid and get to carry the salami.

  13. Kelly Brook Legs Buttcheeks Denim Romper
    fred
    Commented on this photo:

    Fat chick in little shorts.

  14. Kendall Jenner Butt Tight Torn Jeans Hamptons
    dave
    Commented on this photo:

    god i hope she does a sextape

    • RayJ

      Don’t worry, it’s already in the can.
      Both literally and figuratively. Oh yes, she likes the mandingo meat too.

  15. Tyra Banks Crazy Eyes
    Commented on this photo:

    Do not go to Dr. Acula. All he did was suck my blood.
    (RIP M. Hedberg)

  16. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Minidress Talking To Guy In Wheelchair
    fred
    Commented on this photo:

    “No old-ass John Malkovich. I said stay away from me. Gross.”

  17. Renee Somerfield Naked Body Paint PETA Ad
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    Veganism is such a crock. So many hot girls do it because they can still stay skinny since their diet was most vegetable and salad-based anyway. Guys tend to eat meat & cheese every day because it’s necessary to maintain even the most basic masculine physique. This has been a moment in armchair biology.

    Now having said that, I might go vegan if it meant getting to be in the shower with this girl when she washes all of that paint off.

  18. Pregnant Snooki And JWoww Miserable Roger Matthews And Jionni LaValle
    Commented on this photo:

    They look like they were fired from a carnival side show.

  19. Lea Michele Butt Yoga Shorts
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    Booty shorts, butter face.

  20. Jim Caviezel Belly Wetsuit Shirt
    Francis
    Commented on this photo:

    Can´t pray for abs?

  21. Prince William Holding Stomach Kate Middleton Holding Nose Wimbledon
    Stinky
    Commented on this photo:

    That painting just didn’t sit right.

  22. Khloe Kardashian Fat Brother Rob Kardashian Body Pillow Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    She finally found a way to explain to him why she dates black guys.

  23. Liv Tyler Panty Flash Upskirt
    Commented on this photo:

    Have I ever mentioned how much I love the air? I love the air.

  24. Renee Somerfield Naked Body Paint PETA Ad
    j/k
    Commented on this photo:

    I only eat animals that are already dead. That’s one less smelly carcass. I’m doing my part.

  25. Liv Tyler Panty Flash Upskirt
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d elf her.

  26. Joe Jonas Girlfriend Blanda Eggenschwiler
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d love to park in Blanda’s rear.

  27. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Minidress Talking To Guy In Wheelchair
    Commented on this photo:

    Those are some sexy legs!

  28. Khloe Kardashian Fat Brother Rob Kardashian Body Pillow Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks thin by comparison.

  29. Casper Smart Flying Remote Control Helicopter Madonna Tucker
    Commented on this photo:

    Why does that tranny look like Ashley Tisdale?

  30. Renee Somerfield Naked Body Paint PETA Ad
    Commented on this photo:

    I will never give up meat. If the doctor said “If you eat any more pork, you’ll die.” I’d get my affairs in orders then enjoy one last piece of heavenly pork. And die with a smile on my face like I got hit with Joker gas.

  31. Melissa McCarthy Hand And Footprint Ceremony TCL Chinese Theatre
    Lovey
    Commented on this photo:

    Usually I can read, but glancing at this picture I saw ‘TCL Cheese Theatre’ and thought ‘Yeah, that’s about right….’

  32. Amber Rose Huge Ass Spandex Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    This angle is working for her.

  33. Tyra Banks Crazy Eyes
    Commented on this photo:

    Cocaine is a hell of a drug.

  34. Pippa Middleton Butt Sheer Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    This is honestly my first time seeing her face. I have no idea which one she is.

  35. Lea Michele Butt Yoga Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice ass.

  36. Prince William Holding Stomach Kate Middleton Holding Nose Wimbledon
    Brooks
    Commented on this photo:

    Kate: Damn Billy, what did you eat?
    William: I’m not sure what that “English Muffin” was supposed to be, but Thomas is going to get an earful I tell ya.

  37. Melissa McCarthy Hand And Footprint Ceremony TCL Chinese Theatre
    Commented on this photo:

    IT’S FUNNY CUZ SHE’S FAT LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!!!

  38. Melissa McCarthy Hand And Footprint Ceremony TCL Chinese Theatre
    Commented on this photo:

    #thinspiration

  39. Pippa Middleton Butt Sheer Dress
    Commented on this photo:

    She so fly tho

  40. Lea Michele Butt Yoga Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    I would NEVER holler at that — TV/photo magic is amazing

  41. Renee Somerfield Naked Body Paint PETA Ad
    Commented on this photo:

    PETA: Treating animals with ethics and objecting women.

  42. Irina Shayk Nipples Leather Tank Top Guys Arm Around Neck Chiltern Firehouse
    Commented on this photo:

    Ah… The insecure possessive boyfriend choke hold.

  43. Kelly Brook Cleavage Lingerie Instagram
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    This is like janice dickinson posting her pics from the 70′s

  44. Lea Michele Butt Yoga Shorts
    Bonky
    Commented on this photo:

    “Has anybody seen my new, replacement, gay boyfriend, I mean
    my new boyfriend ?”

  45. Nick Nolte Red Face Ragged Clothes Walking With Cane
    Commented on this photo:

    Is there an Albino AC/DC? Are they good?

  46. Renee Somerfield Naked Body Paint PETA Ad
    Buwahahaha
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck PETA in their grain-fed ass.

  47. Taylor Swift Legs Heels Minidress Talking To Guy In Wheelchair
    Ralph
    Commented on this photo:

    She has enough money to buy herself an ass.

  48. Elizabeth Hurley Cleavage Tiara Elizabethan Party
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Whoever styled her here should really consider a career change.

  49. Pregnant Snooki And JWoww Miserable Roger Matthews And Jionni LaValle
    Buwahahaha
    Commented on this photo:

    I think the bulk of the intelligence in this photo is residing at the ends of those two leashes.

  50. Melissa McCarthy Hand And Footprint Ceremony TCL Chinese Theatre
    Art Crow
    Commented on this photo:

    It’s not that often that Sammo Hung meets someone that makes him feel thin.

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