The Crap We Missed – Thursday 6.5.14

June 5th, 2014 // 456 Comments

Was the decision to lead off today’s The Crap We Missed with a practically naked Emily Ratajkowski a difficult one? I’m glad you asked, gay male and straight female readers. Since we’re now engaged in a small group discussion on the nuance of the editorial process of dick joke sites, I’d like to read a quote from Bob Woodward. *clears throat* “First you get the tit photos, then you get the money, then you spend every day of the rest of your life wondering what would have happened if you had cut your drinking down to just five days a week in college.”

Bradley “What are leg days?” Cooper in booty shorts knows what I’m talking about,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. John Mayer Wearing Robe And Sash Belt Montage Hotel
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Followed shortly thereafter by a hotel employee yelling “Mr. Mayer! Mr. Mayer! THE ROBE IS NOT COMPLEMENTARY, MR. MAYER!!”

  2. Emily Ratajkowski Side Boob Cleavage Sticker Bikini SI Swimsuit Shoot Instagram
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    ¡Si! ¡Si! ¡Si!

  3. John Mayer Wearing Robe And Sash Belt Montage Hotel
    Commented on this photo:

    Let’s hope he takes that pink belt and hangs himself from the rafters.

  4. Amber Heard Leg Stretch On Motorcycle James Franco The Adderall Diaries Set
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t worry ladies, you are over 17 so he won’t show you his helmet-head.

  5. Bradley Cooper Skinny Legs Short Shorts American Sniper Set
    Short Round
    Commented on this photo:

    Highway to the Danger Zone takes on a whole new meaning.

  6. Jay Z Walking Behind Beyonce Legs Minidress
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Bitch, you walk point.

  7. Jonah Hill Getting Microphone Pack Adjusted GMA
    Commented on this photo:

    “How long is this faggot gonna be touching me? I have to get on the air and apologize for my gay slur!”

  8. Beth Chapman Stuffed Into Leather Corsett Duane Dog The Bounty Hunter Chapman 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Remember “Big Trouble in Little China”, she’s gonna explode if Kurt Russell appears at the awards.

  9. Carmen Electra Cleavage Butt Booty Shorts Fishnets Elevate Concert Series
    Commented on this photo:

    Great zip for easy access.

  10. Jonah Hill Getting Microphone Pack Adjusted GMA
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Look, I’m not saying I have a Darth Vader action figure in my ass. But if I *DID* (and of course I don’t) I really would appreciate it if you would send a crewmember over here to help me get it out.

  11. Jay Z Walking Behind Beyonce Legs Minidress
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    That whole pimp mentality never leaves an old pimp.

    You put the product on display and let it sell itself while you negotiate in the shadows.

  12. Loni Anderson Cleavage Baby If You've Ever Wondered A WKRP in Cincinnati Reunion
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Everyone stopped wondering about that a long time ago, even Herb.

  13. Vince Neil Fat Belly See Through Shirt 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Notice how we haven’t seen Nicole/Keith in the same photo as these two?

  14. Jonah Hill Getting Microphone Pack Adjusted GMA
    PassingTrue
    Commented on this photo:

    Sir, is that a colostomy bag or did you bring pudding to the studio?

  15. Emily Ratajkowski Side Boob Cleavage Sticker Bikini SI Swimsuit Shoot Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy Bat Tits!

  16. Jonah Hill Getting Microphone Pack Adjusted GMA
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess Jonah just finished blowing the guy who claimed he could clear Jonah of all this controversy but doesn’t what the right thing to do with that mouthful of semen.

  17. Bruce Jenner Creepy Face Long Hair
    Commented on this photo:

    Still needs a VO5 treatment.

  18. Jerry Seinfeld, Jessica Seinfeld Legs Minidress 2014 Baby Buggy Bedtime Bash
    Commented on this photo:

    So far, P!nk is the only one who can pull off that hair cut

  19. Lena Dunham Play Fighting Photographers Girls Set
    PassingTrue
    Commented on this photo:

    Somebody announced pudding on the catering truck.

  20. Lena Dunham Play Fighting Photographers Girls Set
    buzz
    Commented on this photo:

    Even the ugly dress can’t mask all that ugly wearing it.

  21. Jaime Pressly Cleavage Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Commented on this photo:

    Man Jerry Springers wife get’s around

  22. Pope Francis Touching Baby
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Listen, papa cannot bless away dirty diaper, eh, she gotta go.

  23. Lena Dunham Play Fighting Photographers Girls Set
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh fuck, you made eye contact, IT’S GONNA CHARGE!!!

  24. Jaime Pressly Cleavage Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    PassingTrue
    Commented on this photo:

    Yummy.

  25. Pope Francis Touching Baby
    Commented on this photo:

    Too easy

  26. Lena Dunham Play Fighting Photographers Girls Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Dress by Roy Lichtenstein?

  27. Jonah Hill Getting Microphone Pack Adjusted GMA
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Aldous warned him not to sneeze while smuggling heroin.

  28. LeAnn Rimes Side Boob Cleavage 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Just not a pretty girl

  29. Robert Wagner Red Splotchy Face
    Commented on this photo:

    Bob: “Have you Seen my pants?” Piano chest “You’re wearing them honey” Bob..makes face..”Thank God”

  30. Aaron Carter Crazy Eyes Headband Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat Opening Night
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that the one that wants Hilary Duff back?

  31. Beth Chapman Stuffed Into Leather Corsett Duane Dog The Bounty Hunter Chapman 2014 CMT Music Awards
    PassingTrue
    Commented on this photo:

    Two questions:
    1. Where do you start?
    2. Why would you?

  32. LeAnn Rimes Side Boob Cleavage 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    There’s a bit of baboon DNA in there somewhere.

  33. Bruce Jenner Creepy Face Long Hair
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Step #1 Cut off Bruce Jenner’s face, sew it on, assume his identity

    Step #2 Marry some dumb rich bitch, use her to get a reality show and lot of money

    Step #3 Have plastic surgery to prep for assuming Hillary Clinton’s identity.

  34. Neil deGrasse Tyson Cosmos A Spacetime Odyssey Screening Event And Panel Paley Center For Media
    Commented on this photo:

    What do idiot even religionists think when they watch his show? Seems to me their brains would start to overheat. Oh wait…

    • Speaking of idiots, why can’t you edit a comment to correct a typo? Oh I know because it’s an irrelevant celebrity blog run by complete idiots, too.

  35. Beth Chapman Stuffed Into Leather Corsett Duane Dog The Bounty Hunter Chapman 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Dog giving the cutoff sign to the dude blowing up her wetsuit dress thingy.

  36. Jaime Pressly Cleavage Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like they swapped shorts.

  37. Emily Ratajkowski Side Boob Cleavage Sticker Bikini SI Swimsuit Shoot Instagram
    PassingTrue
    Commented on this photo:

    If they’d taught math like this, I could have done much better in Algebra.

  38. Demi Lovato Cleavage Fat Legs Half Shaved Head Cosmopolitan Fun Fearless Latina Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Blowing. Up.

  39. Aaron Carter Crazy Eyes Headband Joseph And The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat Opening Night
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    No, don’t dress up for the red carpet or anything. Just whatever happens to be laying on the floor of your closet is fine.

  40. Emily Ratajkowski Side Boob Cleavage Sticker Bikini SI Swimsuit Shoot Instagram
    Dickinabox
    Commented on this photo:

    I seem to have misplaced my guitar pick, may I borrow one of yours? Any of the green ones will do!

  41. Carmen Electra Cleavage Butt Booty Shorts Fishnets Elevate Concert Series
    Commented on this photo:

    Sumthing doesnt look right here…….Maybe that chick sumo diaper is on backwards……

  42. Cee Lo Green Diamonds On Teeth Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    “You’re looking like a million bucks, Cee Lo! As long as each of those diamonds are worth $500,000.00.”

  43. Carmen Electra Cleavage Butt Booty Shorts Fishnets Elevate Concert Series
    Commented on this photo:

    OR maybe it isnt, how do you know?

  44. Jaime Pressly Cleavage Legs Short Shorts Son Dezi
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    This is what January Jones would look like with a soul.

  45. Lena Dunham Play Fighting Photographers Girls Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Burn her!!!

  46. Robert Wagner Red Splotchy Face
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh shit, it’s the fog rolling in. She’s coming back for revenge.

  47. Cee Lo Green Diamonds On Teeth Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    Really, dude?

    *sigh*

  48. Carmen Electra Cleavage Butt Booty Shorts Fishnets Elevate Concert Series
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice!!!

  49. Beth Chapman Stuffed Into Leather Corsett Duane Dog The Bounty Hunter Chapman 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Donald Sterling
    Commented on this photo:

    Amazing that she doesn’t just tip over.

  50. Beth Chapman Stuffed Into Leather Corsett Duane Dog The Bounty Hunter Chapman 2014 CMT Music Awards
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    I suspect that if a motorboating was attempted it would result in a terrible prolonged drowning.
    When Dog goes in there he must bring his own air supply equipment.

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