The Crap We Missed – Thursday 5.29.14

May 29th, 2014 // 425 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed which has no breasts in the lead-off spot, so right away you can tell what kind of content day it’s been. Other than JWoww‘s hilariously grotesque face, which we should all agree to freely mock and not give a pregnancy pass to because she’s basically just a garbage patch of leftover human parts, I’m not sure any of these other pics should be in here. Oh wait, is that a terrified Seal screaming like someone put a thumbprint on his Leica while his son laughs in delight? Yep, that goes in.

Oh, oh and a Tom Cruise blow job face, yes! I feel better, I’ve done my job here,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    Swearin
    Commented on this photo:

    I think she’s turning Japanese, I think she’s turning Japanese, I really think so…

  2. Lindsay Lohan Nipple No Bra
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s a completely repulsive person. A pathological liar, drug addict and international whore. Anyone would be wise to stay away from her.

    That having been said, I still would. For the story if nothing else.

  3. David Beckham Dickprint Athletic Shorts Knit Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    Shown here bending it

  4. Angelina Jolie Brother James Haven Maleficent World Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    He looks way too much like Angelina for me to fap to her ever again.

  5. Betty White Carressing Mario Lopez Hand Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    The new Harold & Maude reboot looks so badass!!

  6. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Anybody want to guess how long it will take her to jump to the next old billionaire when Hef dies?

  7. David Beckham Dickprint Athletic Shorts Knit Hat
    Commented on this photo:

    We think Posh is horrifying too, David.

  8. Debby Ryan Blonde Hair Tiara
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Gomez but does she stink like Bieber?

  9. Joan Rivers Creepy Tight Face Michigan Avenue Magazine Celebrates Its Women Of Influence May/June Issue Event
    Commented on this photo:

    “Where does he get all those wonderful toys?”

  10. Seal Terrified Scream On Rollercoaster With Son Henry Disneyland
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously who the hell follows Seal into Disneyland?

    There’s got to be better paparazzi gigs than that.

  11. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    THE BITCH ATE OLIVIA MUNN!!

  12. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    This guy is the epitome of not giving a fuck. I love him.

  13. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    That Eastwood has insulted my chair FOR THE LAST TIME!!

  14. Lindsay Lohan Nipple No Bra
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Sorry I missed my flight. I had a miscarriage yesterday.

    Also, sorry I was carrying a gun. Miscarriage.

    Drugs in my bag? I just had a miscarriage in the bathroom!!

  15. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    Kathleen Turner, today, again?

  16. Lacey Chabert Cleavage The Color Of Rain Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Still as beautiful as ever. Ironically, Lindsay Lohan is the only train wreck to come out of “Mean Girls” It’s a tossup for me between her and Amanda Seyfried as the hottest woman in that movie.

    And as much as I like Amanda (and I do like her a lot), I’m leaning towards Lacey here.

  17. Angelina Jolie Brother James Haven Maleficent World Premiere
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks like Jon Voight gave birth after his canoe trip.

  18. Joan Rivers Creepy Tight Face Michigan Avenue Magazine Celebrates Its Women Of Influence May/June Issue Event
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Good lord, I can actually see rebar in her nose.

    • Queef Sister

      It’s amazing what you can do with a little bondo, a few sheet metal screws, synthetic fibers, and dryed out PlayDoh.

  19. Angelina Jolie Brother James Haven Maleficent World Premiere
    Jennyfurr
    Commented on this photo:

    Mangelina.

  20. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Can’t decide if he wants to be a professor or a sailor.

  21. Emily Blunt Butt Tight Dress Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    The pregnancy did not affect her body.

  22. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Surprised he is still allowed to drive one of Kim’s cars after he bailed on the wedding.

  23. Barbara Walters Crazy Eyes Sesame Workshop 12th Annual Benefit Gala
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Elmo made of cloth, but still more alive than YOU!

  24. Prince Harry Petting Cow Royal Bath & West Show
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Its the one day SJP doesn’t mind Kim K getting all the attention.

  25. Tom Cruise Blow Job Face Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Well, I’m off to the rest are….I mean movie set.

  26. Camilla Dutchess Of Cornwall Royal Bath & West Show
    Commented on this photo:

    That face was considered hot enough to cheat on Diana with? Charles, you’re a weird motherfucker.

  27. Donald Faison Derpface Cacee Cobb Maleficent World Premiere
    anonymous
    Commented on this photo:

    Wasn’t she the chick Jessica Simpson fired at one time?

  28. Lacey Chabert Cleavage The Color Of Rain Premiere
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Not bad for a 42-year-old.

  29. Flo Rida World Music Award On Table Nice Airport
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Yo man they lied to us. This place ain’t nice at all!

  30. Betty White Carressing Mario Lopez Hand Extra
    Commented on this photo:

    “These gay boys always have the softest skin.”

  31. Camilla Dutchess Of Cornwall Royal Bath & West Show
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Charles has asked her repeatedly to stop wearing her Best in Show ribbon from the Westminster Horse Show, but she’s having none of it!

  32. Coco Butt Cleavage String Bikini Licious Line Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh yes. She is so fucking sexy. I appreciate all the work she does to maintain her excellent figure. I’d appreciate it all night long.

  33. Betty White Carressing Mario Lopez Hand Extra
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey if you want to come up to my room later, I’ll definitely thank you for being a friend.

  34. Joan Rivers Creepy Tight Face Michigan Avenue Magazine Celebrates Its Women Of Influence May/June Issue Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Batteries not included.

  35. Tom Cruise Blow Job Face Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Photoshoppers – begin.

  36. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    Commented on this photo:

    Fat fuck.

  37. Lacey Chabert Cleavage The Color Of Rain Premiere
    DoinkTheClown
    Commented on this photo:

    Mmmmm midget cleavage…

  38. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah, we’ve all had to deal with the “Taco Bell or Bob’s Big Boy” dilemma at some point in our lives.

  39. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    Jack Hoff
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d write something snarky, but I would feel bad just piling-on.

  40. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    DrX
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m no doctor but I’d check for preeclampsia

  41. Debby Ryan Blonde Hair Tiara
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Congratulations Princess, thine kingdom be named “Syphilis.”

  42. Camilla Dutchess Of Cornwall Royal Bath & West Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Looks as if she won a rosette in one of the categories.

  43. Nicole Scherzinger Butt Tight Pants KISS FM Studios
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s no Coco, but dat ass tho.

  44. Prince Harry Petting Cow Royal Bath & West Show
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    I guess Khloe stopped by England on her way back from France.

  45. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    Just this once
    Commented on this photo:

    Mamma said go right at the lights. Right is the the hand that I write with but I can’t remember which one I used it was so long ago. And left is what daddy did. So do I go straight?

  46. Emily Blunt Butt Tight Dress Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Jack Hoff
    Commented on this photo:

    Kim Pee and Hilary Puff need to take a few lessons from her.

  47. Zoe Kravitz Nipples Legs Short Shorts
    JimBB
    Commented on this photo:

    Awwh, she’s got her mother’s heroin habit.

  48. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    buzz
    Commented on this photo:

    She wasn’t really a looker to begin with but DAMN…how did she turn Asian from banging guidos?

  49. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    Jack Hoff
    Commented on this photo:

    He was awsome in “The Rock”

  50. Donald Faison Derpface Cacee Cobb Maleficent World Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Beautiful couple. Love Donald. Loved “Scrubs”

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