The Crap We Missed – Thursday 5.29.14

May 29th, 2014 // 425 Comments

Welcome to Thursday’s The Crap We Missed which has no breasts in the lead-off spot, so right away you can tell what kind of content day it’s been. Other than JWoww‘s hilariously grotesque face, which we should all agree to freely mock and not give a pregnancy pass to because she’s basically just a garbage patch of leftover human parts, I’m not sure any of these other pics should be in here. Oh wait, is that a terrified Seal screaming like someone put a thumbprint on his Leica while his son laughs in delight? Yep, that goes in.

Oh, oh and a Tom Cruise blow job face, yes! I feel better, I’ve done my job here,

- Photo Boy

Click Here To Start The Gallery

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, INFphoto, Pacific Coast News, Splash News, WENN

superficial

  1. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    Still waiting for that growth spurt, I see.

  2. Lindsay Lohan Nipple No Bra
    Commented on this photo:

    Her teeth are looking great

  3. Flo Rida World Music Award On Table Nice Airport
    Commented on this photo:

    Hey, they got the same shit here that they got in the USA, ‘cept for the lil differences.

    Example?

    Over here, they don’t call it a Quarter Pounder. Over here, they call it a “Royale with Cheese”.

  4. David Beckham Dickprint Athletic Shorts Knit Hat
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Are they making a Trainspotting sequel?

  5. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Ed Harris in “The Terry Richardson Story”

  6. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    Whatever people will come up with here, ‘gonna be hard to beat TMZ on this one…

    LIL KIM – WOWWING NYC With Her Baby Bump

    http://www.tmz.com/2014/05/28/jwoww-jersey-shore-photo-lil-kim/

  7. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh look, Billy… a “celebrity”!

  8. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    I don’t think I can look at him as a badass in a film ever again.

  9. Seal Terrified Scream On Rollercoaster With Son Henry Disneyland
    Commented on this photo:

    he’s really black knuckling it.

  10. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    JCoww

  11. Lindsay Lohan Nipple No Bra
    dontkillthemessenger
    Commented on this photo:

    Those must’ve been 27 rough years.

    • dennis

      I’d say it was the mileage but she doesn’t do anything but drugs and guys.

      Laying around not doing shit on the daily can’t be that hard.

  12. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    If you look up the word “ennui” you’ll see this photo.

  13. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    Commented on this photo:

    shortly before he broke both femurs and his lower back.

  14. Tom Cruise Blow Job Face Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Helena Handbasket
    Commented on this photo:

    Gee, I wonder how his jaw got so flexible?

  15. Emily Blunt Butt Tight Dress Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Let me be Blunt. Just for like a few hours, so I can play with myself.

  16. Barbara Walters Crazy Eyes Sesame Workshop 12th Annual Benefit Gala
    Flatliner
    Commented on this photo:

    Little did Barbara know that she would be treated like a puppet as well.

  17. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    Commented on this photo:

    Weapon of Choice.

  18. Angelina Jolie Brother James Haven Maleficent World Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    if he wore a wig, not even Brad would know the difference

  19. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Instagram
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Hugh has been dead for six months and no one has notice that she is still cashing his social security checks.

  20. Barbara Walters Crazy Eyes Sesame Workshop 12th Annual Benefit Gala
    gooch
    Commented on this photo:

    Three puppets with a hand up their ass.

  21. Barbara Walters Crazy Eyes Sesame Workshop 12th Annual Benefit Gala
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Multiple big haired hand puppets brandishing ticklers….that’s how to get a senior going.

  22. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    of all his disposable wives, this one’s the ugliest.

  23. Angelina Jolie Brother James Haven Maleficent World Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Does everyone in this family have a different last name?

  24. Joan Rivers Creepy Tight Face Michigan Avenue Magazine Celebrates Its Women Of Influence May/June Issue Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Looked more natural to me that what’s going on with J-Woww.

  25. David Beckham Dickprint Athletic Shorts Knit Hat
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    He says when he feels like crying
    he starts laughing thinking about …

    Glory days well they’ll pass you by
    Glory days in the wink of a young girl’s eye
    Glory days, glory days

  26. Crystal Hefner Cleavage Instagram
    Commented on this photo:

    The books proved too onerous, didn’t they? Sorry… “hard”.

  27. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Reds 3?

  28. Camilla Dutchess Of Cornwall Royal Bath & West Show
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    A stereotypical upper crust UK face….impeccably coiffed, tastefully garbed, and weird teeth going every which way.

  29. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    gooch
    Commented on this photo:

    if only Morton’s had a drive through…

  30. Seal Terrified Scream On Rollercoaster With Son Henry Disneyland
    Commented on this photo:

    (voiceover narration): Heidi folded her arms across her Valkyrie breasts and grimaced scornfully. “Look at him!” the Ubermodel exclaimed. “Look at his face! He is VEAK! He is no man!” And then she spit on the ground and posed topless for Instagram in a desperate attempt to remain relevant.

  31. Tom Cruise Blow Job Face Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Coooooooock!”

  32. Lacey Chabert Cleavage The Color Of Rain Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    Ooh… yes please!

  33. Betty White Carressing Mario Lopez Hand Extra
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    Mario did not know what he was in for when he paid for the ultimate cougar experience.

  34. Camilla Dutchess Of Cornwall Royal Bath & West Show
    Commented on this photo:

    Sign provided by the Department of Redundancy Department.

  35. John Malkovich Scarf Cuffed Jeans
    Commented on this photo:

    It ain’t easy “being John Malkovich”

  36. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    George P Burdell
    Commented on this photo:

    He is on a stakeout so he can eat donuts.

  37. Fat Rob Kardashian Driving
    Commented on this photo:

    I can’t believe he missed his sister’s wedding. I mean, c’mon… free food!

  38. Donald Faison Derpface Cacee Cobb Maleficent World Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    That’s how married couple, you has an one year old child, react the first time they managed to get out in months.

  39. Joan Rivers Creepy Tight Face Michigan Avenue Magazine Celebrates Its Women Of Influence May/June Issue Event
    Commented on this photo:

    Honestly, wrinkles would be more becoming.

  40. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    snugglevision
    Commented on this photo:

    Kimora Lee?

  41. Nicole Scherzinger Butt Tight Pants KISS FM Studios
    Commented on this photo:

    Note to self… ditch white van for black van.

  42. Michelle Rodriguez Drunk Cleavage Yacht South Of France
    Commented on this photo:

    …getting fisted by either Boner Boy or Cara Delavigne. I can’t keep up.

  43. Lindsay Lohan Nipple No Bra
    satan'srighthand74
    Commented on this photo:

    The Rocky Dennis Story: The Early Years

  44. JWoww Puffy Bloated Face Pregnant
    Commented on this photo:

    This is why god invented doggystyle.

  45. Seal Terrified Scream On Rollercoaster With Son Henry Disneyland
    Commented on this photo:

    “Eeek! A spider!”

  46. Flo Rida World Music Award On Table Nice Airport
    I give up
    Commented on this photo:

    Ya gotta watch these mo’fos over here man…I hear they’re into dick cheese.

  47. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    Commented on this photo:

    This is right after Chris Hansen stepped out from behind a door.

  48. Tom Cruise Blow Job Face Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    “Nope, no reason why I’m standing in front of the YMCA making this face. No reason at all,”

  49. Emily Blunt Butt Tight Dress Edge Of Tomorrow NYC Premiere
    Commented on this photo:

    How do I put this subtly? I’d like to have sexual relations with her. Nailed it.

  50. Ed Harris Slicked Back Hair Cowboy Boots Jumping Over Porch Railing The Adderall Diaries Set
    Commented on this photo:

    That young whippersnapper is gonna regret setting foot on his lawn.

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